things you would not want to hear on the SGC's intercom

[penguininablender]

Lol!


Can I take this moment to ask who Mary Steenbergen is?

lol, the woman with which Jack is enamoured. Hmm...It's hard to think of something she has been in that you might have seen. Google her under images (she is one of those people you see in all sorts of stuff but rarely care enough to get her name) Oh!! she was in "what's eating Gilbert Grape", she had an on screen affair with Johnny Depp. ( and she is married to Ted Danson)

[dancer_4_daniel]

Teal'c: I am also indeed both glad and grateful that I do not have to wear the article of clothing known as the "thong". They appear most uncomfortable...

[Syera]

(Static/beeping/pulsing tone which continues for hours.)

[penguininablender]

Teal'c: I am also indeed both glad and grateful that I do not have to wear the article of clothing known as the "thong". They appear most uncomfortable...

lol, that's funny

[Morgasshk]

walter: we've picked up a ship on radar sir, its hailing the planet.
Hammond: this is stargate command, why do you enter our territory?

Ship captain: this is the starship enterprise.
*jack jumps up*
Jack: YES! I KNEW IT! tealc, daniel pay up! escpecialy you carter....

lmfao, good call!

Intercom: Similar sounding countdown to the one on Lost

Intercom: Scotty: I dinna hava tha powah cap'n!

Intercom: This is Blade, I heard there were some kinda of techno Vampires on the way? I'm here to offer my services, *evil laugh*

Intercom: Hi! This is Ork from Mork and You are on the air! Woohoo! Blah Blah, Blah! Sooo, who's our next caller? Hey, It's me!

Intercom: Paging, Paging, I'm looking for a Hugh... Mr Jass? a Mr Hugh Jass? Anyone seen a Hugh Jass on the bass? (Sam turns to McKay, "I think someone is looking for you...")

Intercom: Hiccup, cough, ahem, yeah, (in incredibly drunken voice) yeah, Carter, you're promoted honey, because, you, *hic, cough*, have nice norks, you can be a commander or something *hic* now

Intercom: "Seriously! Anyone that gets me Treehouse of Horror VIII on DVD can have a promotion, I am NOT kidding! O'neill out"

[Syera]

Jack: "Hey, Carter, are you wearin' my underwear? 'Cause I'm wearing yours and they're not doin' it for me."

[penguininablender]

lmfao, good call!

Intercom: Similar sounding countdown to the one on Lost

Intercom: Scotty: I dinna hava tha powah cap'n!

Intercom: This is Blade, I heard there were some kinda of techno Vampires on the way? I'm here to offer my services, *evil laugh*

Intercom: Hi! This is Ork from Mork and You are on the air! Woohoo! Blah Blah, Blah! Sooo, who's our next caller? Hey, It's me!

Intercom: Paging, Paging, I'm looking for a Hugh... Mr Jass? a Mr Hugh Jass? Anyone seen a Hugh Jass on the bass? (Sam turns to McKay, "I think someone is looking for you...")

Intercom: Hiccup, cough, ahem, yeah, (in incredibly drunken voice) yeah, Carter, you're promoted honey, because, you, *hic, cough*, have nice norks, you can be a commander or something *hic* now

Intercom: "Seriously! Anyone that gets me Treehouse of Horror VIII on DVD can have a promotion, I am NOT kidding! O'neill out"

haha! you said norks

[Syera]

"...Sorry guys, we're doomed."

[Lokii]

...General Lanudry has been re-assigned.... (Cheers).... His replacement will be General... this can't be right.... (Throat clearing) The new commander of the SGC will be Army General Forrest Gump.... we're so screwed.....

[penguininablender]

...General Lanudry has been re-assigned.... (Cheers).... His replacement will be General... this can't be right.... (Throat clearing) The new commander of the SGC will be Army General Forrest Gump.... we're so screwed.....

lol

Forest: I like shrimp...do you like shrimp? I own a shrimp boat.
Daniel: Oh no
Sam: This sucks
Mitchell: SHRIMP!I LOVE SHRIMP!!! Hey ...does that mean you can get me free shrimp??

[dancer_4_daniel]

Forrest:I like to run.
Sam: Run Forrest Run...right out of here!

[Morgasshk]

Intercom: I like Jenny

Intercom: Me and Jenny was like peas and carrots

Intercom: I just kept on RUNNING!

Intercom: Sometimes, there just aren't enough rocks.

Intercom: But she tastes like cigarettes!

Intercom: Oh, yes sir. Bit me right in the buttocks. They said it was a million dollar wound, but the army must keep that money 'cause I still haven't seen a nickel of that million dollars. Crap, intercom is on...

Intercom: (O'neill) What the frack is that smell?

Intercom: (O'Neill, obviously trashed) Carter, oi, carter, listen to dis, Hello my honey, hello my baby, an na na na na na, ummm, theres something elsethere, I forget.

Intercom: There will be a 5:30pm showing of Series 6 of the Simpsons in the gateroom, no camera's will be permitted, if you are affiliated with any copywright or braodcasting authority, you are commanded to forget you heard this message and go about you business in the usual manner.

[Morgania]

We are the Borg. You will be assimilated. Resistant is futile.

[Trek_Girl42]

Walter's a cylon, Walter's a cylon!

[Syera]

"Intelligence has it that our uniforms may have been tainted with dangerous chemicals during the last washing. You will remove your uniforms, put them in bags, and place them all in the laundry chutes. Please form a neat line holding your bagged uniforms."