Originally posted by gater101
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Just dropping this off...
Title: Shatter
Summary: Rodney doesn’t talk much; not when he feels like this. Kindred tag.
Characters: John & Rodney
Pairing: John/Teyla
Rating: K
Title: Shatter
Summary: Rodney doesn’t talk much; not when he feels like this. Kindred tag.
Characters: John & Rodney
Pairing: John/Teyla
Rating: K
Spoiler:
“What about you?”
John grunts as he looks up, his gaze landing on the (until now) quiet scientist. Rodney doesn’t talk much, not when he feels like this. John knows because he was there, the first time and he was there with Elizabeth. Rodney is all talk about doom and gloom but when it comes, when it grips them with cold, unrelenting fingers he’s different. He’s not like John – who hides everything – or Ronon – who beats the crap out of everything. John wonders if it’s the over-whelming amount of alcohol the Canadian has consumed that has drawn the words from him but when he meets the blue eyes of his friend, there is a clarity – as startling as it is painful – chilling John to the bone.
“I didn’t just lose my best friend – again.”
They’d had to drag Rodney out of the stasis room at dinner time. Rodney’s eyes mist over again but John doesn’t look away, doesn’t ask him to hide them. This is how Rodney deals with it. It’s better than John’s way.
“He’s not gone... not yet.”
John nods, casting his eyes away from Rodney’s, afraid his true thoughts might shine through and shatter whatever illusion it is that Rodney is under. John wants Carson back just as much as anyone else but he’s come to realise that that is an unlikely situation. He’s tried to console himself with the speech that Ronon laboured onto them – he’s just a clone; it’s not really Carson.
Rodney’s cheerleading must have done a number on him.
“I meant Teyla.”
John looks up again, his eyes lingering on Rodney’s once more before glancing down to the beer bottle in his hand. The label is almost half off and he’s not even taken a sip from it yet. He can’t. He can’t drink when he knows she’s out there. He sighs and looks up at the ceiling, wondering if the mystical architecture of the city of the Ancients will provide him with the answer. It hadn’t the night before, so he’s not surprised when it doesn’t again.
“We’ll find her.”
Rodney purses his lips, casts his own glance out the window that is shrouded by an eerie mist. The city had descended into silence one Carson had been put in the chamber, since John had come back without Teyla. John knows it’s the eye, the calm before the storm. The air is a heavy burden on his heart and shoulders, his lungs and muscles and he can’t wait for the fog to lift.
“That’s not what I asked.”
John knows this but he doesn’t answer because he doesn’t have the words to answer. She’s gone and there’s nothing he can do about it. They’d done all they could; still it wasn’t enough. He’d seen what Michael had done to the others; he can’t let himself think he’s done the same to Teyla. He has to believe that they’ll find her.
He’ll never forgive himself if he doesn’t – if they don’t.
He meets Rodney’s eyes again and the scientist smiles flatly.
“That’s what I thought.” John tries to smile in return. He flicks the label away with his thumb and forefinger. He can hear Rodney cough – or is it a sob? -, emit a low laugh and he can imagine the head shake that accompanies it. “We’re quite the pair.” He lifts the rim of the bottle to his lips; doesn’t drink.
John does the same, lowers it and gazes out to the shroud around Atlantis.
“We’ll do it.”
There’s a beat and John lowers his gaze again.
“Yeah.”
He wishes he could hear the enthusiasm he’s sure Rodney tried to put into the word.
“Yeah.”
He can’t even hear it in his own.
John grunts as he looks up, his gaze landing on the (until now) quiet scientist. Rodney doesn’t talk much, not when he feels like this. John knows because he was there, the first time and he was there with Elizabeth. Rodney is all talk about doom and gloom but when it comes, when it grips them with cold, unrelenting fingers he’s different. He’s not like John – who hides everything – or Ronon – who beats the crap out of everything. John wonders if it’s the over-whelming amount of alcohol the Canadian has consumed that has drawn the words from him but when he meets the blue eyes of his friend, there is a clarity – as startling as it is painful – chilling John to the bone.
“I didn’t just lose my best friend – again.”
They’d had to drag Rodney out of the stasis room at dinner time. Rodney’s eyes mist over again but John doesn’t look away, doesn’t ask him to hide them. This is how Rodney deals with it. It’s better than John’s way.
“He’s not gone... not yet.”
John nods, casting his eyes away from Rodney’s, afraid his true thoughts might shine through and shatter whatever illusion it is that Rodney is under. John wants Carson back just as much as anyone else but he’s come to realise that that is an unlikely situation. He’s tried to console himself with the speech that Ronon laboured onto them – he’s just a clone; it’s not really Carson.
Rodney’s cheerleading must have done a number on him.
“I meant Teyla.”
John looks up again, his eyes lingering on Rodney’s once more before glancing down to the beer bottle in his hand. The label is almost half off and he’s not even taken a sip from it yet. He can’t. He can’t drink when he knows she’s out there. He sighs and looks up at the ceiling, wondering if the mystical architecture of the city of the Ancients will provide him with the answer. It hadn’t the night before, so he’s not surprised when it doesn’t again.
“We’ll find her.”
Rodney purses his lips, casts his own glance out the window that is shrouded by an eerie mist. The city had descended into silence one Carson had been put in the chamber, since John had come back without Teyla. John knows it’s the eye, the calm before the storm. The air is a heavy burden on his heart and shoulders, his lungs and muscles and he can’t wait for the fog to lift.
“That’s not what I asked.”
John knows this but he doesn’t answer because he doesn’t have the words to answer. She’s gone and there’s nothing he can do about it. They’d done all they could; still it wasn’t enough. He’d seen what Michael had done to the others; he can’t let himself think he’s done the same to Teyla. He has to believe that they’ll find her.
He’ll never forgive himself if he doesn’t – if they don’t.
He meets Rodney’s eyes again and the scientist smiles flatly.
“That’s what I thought.” John tries to smile in return. He flicks the label away with his thumb and forefinger. He can hear Rodney cough – or is it a sob? -, emit a low laugh and he can imagine the head shake that accompanies it. “We’re quite the pair.” He lifts the rim of the bottle to his lips; doesn’t drink.
John does the same, lowers it and gazes out to the shroud around Atlantis.
“We’ll do it.”
There’s a beat and John lowers his gaze again.
“Yeah.”
He wishes he could hear the enthusiasm he’s sure Rodney tried to put into the word.
“Yeah.”
He can’t even hear it in his own.
Long live the Queen of Angst
We must convert LInda from shipper to thunking shipper.
Maybe SGA has the power to cure the common cold... Elf always talks about the power of "Teh Hair." 
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