Favorite Farscape Quotes

[Huaracocha]

Some lovely quotes here

I'm guessing most of the Harvey ones have been exhausted but here are some of my favourites;

John: Harvey, kiss my medulla oblongata.

*

Harvey: Give me the Letterman list then.
John: Earth, Dad, pizza, sex, cold beer, fast cars, sex, Aeryn, love.
Harvey: Well, we're dead.

*

Harvey: COMING THIS YEAR! JOHN AND HARVEY'S WORMHOLE WEAPON TO THE STARS!
John: We're on my timetable. You're fired.

*

Harvey: I resent you calling me here at a whim.
John: If you dont like it, there's the dumpster. Those are the rules, Harv.

*

John: If he gets the wormhole tech, what will he use it for?
Harvey: Faster delivery of pizzas.

*

Harvey: Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to pay our final respects and to say farewell to our dear friend, Commander John Crichton. A schmuck. Muleheaded, reckless, and probably brain-dead before I met him.

[blueray]

Crichton: Cross my heart, smack me dead, stick a lobster on my head!
--Thanks for sharing

that quote had me laughing out loud when i saw that episode and still does .

bad timing:

Crichton: (into a tape recorder) My name is John Crichton...an astronaut. Four years ago, I got...shot through a wormhole to a distant part of the galaxy. I ending up on this ship...this living ship, populated by escaping prisoners...who became my friends. I made enemies.

[blueray]

Zhaan: He says he's been experiencing the future.
Aeryn: The future? He can barely function in the present.

[BigBear]

"You want someone to like you? Invest in a mirror" (Chiana)

[tmoore4261]

That's why I loved Farscape, Crichton and his zainy, zainy quotes:

Emperor Staleek: A fission bomb. [Staleek's guards start to approach Chrichton] Put those down!

John Crichton: Nice threads. You must be the Emperor. Now, before anybody decides to get clever, you should know I have multiple dead-man sensors from every culture on my ship and a few cultures I haven't heard of. My heart stops, we all go boom. My heart speeds up, it's boom again. Too hot, too cold, too happy, too sad, thirsty, hungry, bored... it's John Lee Hooker Time... boom, boom, boom. And you try your little psychic trick... kaboom... and we're all pushing up day-glow daisies.

Season 4 / Episode 20: - We're So Screwed (2): Hot to Katratzi

Hahahahahahaha ....... I was laughing just reading it and the quotes you guys have posted, he would always have me cracking up ... funny stuff.

[Geryalex]

"Damn, Smokey. You can't argue with a woman" ("Meltdown")

[rushy]

Scorpy: Terribly sorry, didn't see ya there.
Aeryn: I AM UNDER ATTACK I REPEAT I AM UNDER ATTACK!!

[ValaAeryn]

Crichton: "John Crichton, Wizard of Oz"

[Infinite-Possibilities]

"RONALDO!"

*Crichton kicks Dargo in his bleeding wounded leg*

Yeah, I just watched that episode again. It's also kind of amusing how that kind of sounds topical even today despite there being a different guy called Rolando who is famously associated with football than back then.

[Geryalex]

The first couple of times I heard that "Ronaldo", I thought it was only my imagination. But I made the right association - it's for a good reason that they call the young one by his whole name ;-)

"Hope, D'Argo. It's what keeps you going."

[St@r:chickwithpun]

B'Sogg: (as Chiana holds a gun on him) You're a thief and a tralk, but you're not a killer.

Reminds me of someone a little less Farscape-y...

[St@r:chickwithpun]

"The reason he's the only one unaffected by the light is because he's deficient."
"Who're you calling 'deficient'?"
"You. You've to the worst eyes out of all of us."
"I got GREAT eyes! They're better than 20/20, and they're BLUE!"
--Chiana and John

"If it's blue eyes that's going to save us, we need to come up with a VERY good plan."
--Aeryn

Obviously Aeryn didn't think her own blue eyes would be much use in that situation, either...(!) Since she's so "superior" though, they're probably *beyond* "better than 20/20"!!

[St@r:chickwithpun]

Aeryn: Rain? Is that what you call this? I like it. - A Human Reaction

I heard somewhere that Claudia improvised that line, as it just happened to be raining while they were filming. Funnily enough, Aeryn is an anagram of an alternative spelling of rain ("rayne") Also, that's one of many quotes I have stuck on my bedroom ceiling (were on a wall once, but I ran out of space!), not all Farscape, but all either amusing or insightful.

The Farscape ones I have up there (besides the rain one above) are below - I know some have been quoted in this thread already. They're fairly accurate as they were mostly written down while watching the episodes, but it was a while ago and I didn't make a note which episodes most of them were from:

*Rygel [to D'Argo, about a guitar-like instrument, in "Natural Election"]: Why did you construct another of those hideous instruments? my bowels make better music!

*Aeryn [to Rygel]: Nobody knows you here. It's only people who know you who want to kill you.

*Rygel: [something like]: Hail the prince of the blinking obvious(!) [can't remember exact quote]

*Zhaan: Getting dren-faced is not helping, Rygel(!) [he was getting drunk]

*Crichton [about Rygel, D'Argo and Aeryn's feelings regarding Zhaan's religious 'quest']: Screw 'em, Zhaanie - you're a tenth-level Pa'u...you get to eleven, we get a TV ministry(!)
Zhaan: If I may be honest, John, most of the time I have no idea what you're saying.
Crichton: Neither do I(!)

*Crichton: I got great eyes. They're better than 20/20. And they're BLUE! [whereas mine are blue but obviously not so 20/20 as I had to put my glasses on to see the rest of my ceiling quotes properly, ironically]

*Aeryn [while in labour!]: Shooting makes me feel better!

Also, not from Farscape itself but related to it:
*reviewer in SFX magazine: ...the death of Zhaan in the two-part "Self-Inflicted Wounds" comes like a halibut applied with force to the face.

*Claudia Black [in an interview, in Farscape magazine I think]: ...If you are feeling down, these things I live by may help you as they have me: unleash the creativity inside yourselves, vote green, fall in love and eat chocolate." [ I'm all for creativity and chocolate]

Not on the ceiling, I also like when Aeryn exclaims/mutters "For the love of Cholak(!)"...though recently it's started to remind me of my manager frequently using the phrase "Oh, for Pete's sake(!)" which could well be the human equivalent...! "Frell" is always good, too...and I like how Pilot says "Officer Sun", but that's not really much of a quote.

[Geryalex]

Reminds me of someone a little less Farscape-y...

[rushy]

Avatar-Stark: This is all about you, John Crichton! You're far too sick to be let run free in the universe. And when your body is dead, your mind will live on. Here. With us. Welcome home, John.

John Headroom: My name John Crichton-Crichton. The most notorius criminal in the known universe. I may look Sebacean, but I'm not-not-not. Billions upon billions upon billions of lives hang in the ba-alance, hang in the ba-alance. I may look Sebacean. Hang in the ba-alance. Your mission, should you choose to accept it. Your mission, should you choose to accept it: travel to the source of evil-evil. Discover the darkness. Erp. Erp. Have a good day.
Stark: Manual!

Stark: Vouchers. Each good for one answer to one question. Squeeze them hard, use them well. Oh, time's out! Game's up! Good luck! Have fun! The tower is up, but up is down. Follow the path through the fairy town.
John: I have... some questions.