Favorite SG1 Quotes

[Goodfairy]

From the Fair Game:

Daniel: What just happened?
Jack: Apparently we said hello, insulted each other, and broke for recess.

[Lucycat]

Foothold

Carter: Mayborne, you are an IDIOT every day of the week, why couldn't you just take one day off?!

[Gate Girl]

From Enemy Mine

EDWARDS: O'Neill was right about you. You are a pain in the ass. But, well worth it.

Love it!!

[Morgania]

Gen. Hammond: Can we determine what threat they pose?
Col. O'Neill: Apparently all desserts on base are in grave danger.

[Eye Of Ra]

The Enemy Within


O'Neill: Listen, I gotta ask you something. It's not easy for me.
Kawalsky: We're friends.
O'Neill: If you don't make it... can I have your stereo

[Reseph(Shed)]

In Last night's episode, Thor's Chariot
Teal'c to O'Neil: "Things will not calm down, in fact they will calm up". He said something like this but it was funny. It may not have came out right but it was still the truth.

[Lucycat]

From URGO

Teal'c *guzzles pitcher of coffee
Jack: Teal'c, isn't that hot?
Teal'c: Extremely.

[Eye Of Ra]

Mitchell: This place is deader than a Texas salad bar.

[Morgania]

Mitchell: This place is deader than a Texas salad bar.

Which episode was that? I'm going to look for salad in Texas someday.

[USS Thor]

"Are You Smiling?" O'Neill
"First Time in a Death Glider" Jonas
"Oh" Rolls the Glider haha

[Madness reigns]

Fallen

Col. O'Neill: All I'm saying... just for the record... this is the wackiest plan we've ever come up with. [He turns and starts to leave the room]

Maj. Carter: Wackier than strapping an active Stargate to the bottom of the X-302?

Col. O'Neill: [As he walks out the door] Oh, yeah.

Maj. Carter: [Calling after O'Neill] Wackier than—than blowing up a sun?

Col. O'Neill: [From the corridor, unseen] Yep!

Maj. Carter: [to Jonas and Daniel] ...He's probably right.

[RedDevil]

From Lost City part 1:
"I did it again."
That's one of my favorite quotes from the show.

Or then from season twos episode The fifth race:
Dr. Jackson: "Uh, w-well, my translation's a little bit vague, um, I think the circle means 'the place of our legacy'…or it could be 'a piece of our leg', but the first seems to make more sense."

Also, on of the best few lines from Unending:
Dr. Jackson: I told you to bring something to amuse yourself. I didn't mean me or the crew.
Vala: They won't believe it's my birthday…again.
Dr. Jackson: Not my problem.
Vala: Being stuck on this ship is worse than being stuck at the SGC! I tell you, the last time I was this bored, I took hostages!
Dr. Jackson: I was there.

[Eye Of Ra]

Jackson: We'll go in disguise; pretend to be foreigners.
O'Neill: How are you going to do that?
Jackson: Well, I speak twenty-three different languages. Pick one

[tomstone]

I havent read this one before, but it got me bursting out laughing when I noticed that last part.

9x01 Avalon
Vala describing to Mitchell and Daniel a Artefact she found.

Daniel: "Why do you need me?"
Vala: "Reading it is one thing and understanding it is another. The Tresure it describes is on earth, but I know nothing about your fair planet...other than it seems to have a rather interresting if somewhat limited Genepool"
Mitchell and Daniel giving looks at each other that say "What does she mean with limited?"

[tomstone]

2x16 A Matter of Time

Carter: "Sir, relatively speaking, by ordering O'neill to wait 5 minutes, you really told him to wait 6 hours or more."
Hammond: "Captain, you are relatively giving me a Headache"