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    bad news: there's nothing near
    I'm a Slasher. I slash. It's what I do.
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      Good News: The Wraith show up unexpectedly (having found the way to Earth) and eat enough people so there's enough food for those who are left. This is primarily good news for the people that are left..... ;D
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        bad news: half of SG-1 was culled
        I'm a Slasher. I slash. It's what I do.
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          Good News: They can get clones to replace them.
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            bad news: the clones are defective
            I'm a Slasher. I slash. It's what I do.
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              Good News: They are defective in that they try to heroically sacrifice themselves at every moment. This is good news for the rest of the team.
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                bad news: their heroic sacrifies never work

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                  Good News: The others resort to simply throwing the clones into the line of fire whenever necessary.
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                    bad news: the clones make lousy shields

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                      Good news: But they make great target practice
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                      The Red Team proudly supports Stargate: Universe, Suck it Blue

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                        Bad News: Unfortunately they sure don't last long.
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                          Good News: If you are not satified you can get your money back
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                          The Red Team proudly supports Stargate: Universe, Suck it Blue

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                            Bad News: Unfortunately you'll be dead by that time.
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                              good news: there's a catch 22
                              I'm a Slasher. I slash. It's what I do.
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                                Bad News: Catch-22's have never saved anyone.
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