things you would not want to hear on the SGC's intercom

[Lilith]

Daniel: Attention all personel. This is Dr. Jackson. Due to the coffee shortage, you are all required to buy me one bag of premium coffee per day until this crisis has passed. Oh, and don't try anything stupid. I have General O'Neill hostage.

Jack: Now Daniel....

Daniel: Shut up before I castrate you.

*klaxons ring and Ba'al hologram shows up*

Ba'al: Where is O'Neill?

Daniel: Sorry Ba'al, but your gonna have to wait your turn. Now, where's my coffee?

Ba'al: Dr. Jackson's coffee deprived? I'll come back in a week, if you all are still alive.

[Trek_Girl42]

Attention! We'll be projecting tonight's season premiere of Wormhole X-Treme onto the gateroom wall! Siler's bringing popcorn!

[Lokii]

Airman: Here you go Dr. Jackson a whole case of coffee

Daniel: Why than.....decaf.....DECAF!!!!!! YOU BROUGHT ME DECAF!!!!!!

O'Neill: I suggest you RUN!!!!!

[Lilith]

Airman: Here you go Dr. Jackson a whole case of coffee

Daniel: Why than.....decaf.....DECAF!!!!!! YOU BROUGHT ME DECAF!!!!!!

O'Neill: I suggest you RUN!!!!!

*pulls out a shot gun and cocks it* Daniel: It's hunting season!!!

[penguininablender]

*pulls out a shot gun and cocks it* Daniel: It's hunting season!!!

lol...


Airmen: here dr.jackson....this isnt decaf
Dr. Jackson: WHAT!!! THIS ISNT THE STARBUCKS BOLD SUMATRA BLEND!!

Jack: Run son...run fast!!!

[2ndgenerationalteran]

walter: we've picked up a ship on radar sir, its hailing the planet.
Hammond: this is stargate command, why do you enter our territory?

Ship captain: this is the starship enterprise.
*jack jumps up*
Jack: YES! I KNEW IT! tealc, daniel pay up! escpecialy you carter....

[dancer_4_daniel]

Walter: I wonder if they have a Lt. Uhura...

[2ndgenerationalteran]

landry: twenty bucks says, the ori kick the crap out of us. fifty says vala will actually prostrate when we get our ass kicked.

[Jakebbq]

Daniel: Black as hell, strong as death, sweet as love. mmm Coffee

[Trek_Girl42]

Landry: In order to raise funds due to budget cuts, we'll be appearing in a commercial.....a camera crew and representitives from Maxwell House are on their way, I suggest everyone work on their singing.....And Walter, I need you to re-arrange the patches on the uniforms, we'll need to wear the logo of our sponser.....

[dancer_4_daniel]

Landry: In addition to the commerical, we're going to be in an infomercial for Bow Flex. Everybody hit the gym!

[Trek_Girl42]

Landry: In addition to the commerical, we're going to be in an infomercial for Bow Flex. Everybody hit the gym!

Teal'c, you'll be our poster boy!

[dancer_4_daniel]

Teal'c: What is this "Poster" you speak of?
Daniel: A picture of a person. You get to be the person the picture will be off.
Teal'c: Pictures like the ones O'Neill has in his locker?
Daniel: Not quite...

[penguininablender]

Teal'c: What is this "Poster" you speak of?
Daniel: A picture of a person. You get to be the person the picture will be off.
Teal'c: Pictures like the ones O'Neill has in his locker?
Daniel: Not quite...

lol

Teal'c: That is good indeed Daniel, I do not look like either "Mary Steenbergen" or "Uma Thurman" at all.
Daniel:.....no buddy, no you dont

[Trek_Girl42]

lol

Teal'c: That is good indeed Daniel, I do not look like either "Mary Steenbergen" or "Uma Thurman" at all.
Daniel:.....no buddy, no you dont

Lol!


Can I take this moment to ask who Mary Steenbergen is?