things you would not want to hear on the SGC's intercom

[Syera]

"Attention, personnel, the SGC has been chosen as the site of the Annual Alien Convention. You will continue your normal duties during the convention, which will last from the third to the eleventh.

Do not associate with the Ferengi."

[penguininablender]

"Attention, personnel, the SGC has been chosen as the site of the Annual Alien Convention. You will continue your normal duties during the convention, which will last from the third to the eleventh.

Do not associate with the Ferengi."

attention: If a ferengi asks you " I think I have something on my ear...would you try to get it off of there for me?" DO NOT COMPLY!!!

[2ndgenerationalteran]

Landry: MITCHELL! Get your ass in here! i got a call from your mother and OOH is she mad at you!

[Syera]

"This is the Spanish Inquisition!"

[Unorthodox]

"Folks, this is General Landry. We will be holding the next Brady Bunch Reunion at 1500 hours tomorrow. All security officers please need to remain informed of all Tok'ra appearances within the Reunion area - we all know how the Tok'ra love the Brady Bunch..."

[Kestra Scott]

Sam: Come on sir, where did you hide my pregnancy test? You do want to know if you're going to be a father again don't you?

Jack: I left it at your place last night. You were suppose to tell me the results today, remember?

Sam: Right, sorry sir. I'll have those test results for you tonight

[aacid]

Season Seven or Prior

Hammond: "Maintainence and Medical Team to the Commisary. And Will Col. O'Neill, Major Carter, and whoever mad that abomination that they tried to pass off as blue Jello please come to my office within five minutes. After that, the MP's are cleared to use Zats."

[Kestra Scott]

Season Seven or Prior

Hammond: "Maintainence and Medical Team to the Commisary. And Will Col. O'Neill, Major Carter, and whoever mad that abomination that they tried to pass off as blue Jello please come to my office within five minutes. After that, the MP's are cleared to use Zats."

Jack: Sir it wasn't our fault. Felger challenged us to a jello wrestling match and we just couldn't turn him down. Half way through we ran out of jello so we HAD to make more.
Sam: I quess we didn't get the recipe right, sir.

[Syera]

"We have an invasion of fangirls! This is not a drill! Repeat, we have an invasion of fangirls!"

[gatebuster64]

lol, and try our new Prim'tah kids meal that comes with a super Jaffa action figure

and now your children can get a healthy choice like goa'uld apple dippers

[dancer_4_daniel]

Sam: Well...remember that one experiment that went awry?...

Felger: You mean I have to change diapers and I didn't even get to have the fun that went into it?!?

[Pharaoh Atem]

attention all personal would the pilot of the cargo ship please report to the surface your park illegally

[Lilith]

Jack: Will the Jaffa who parked his death glider in my parking spot please move it before i blow it shreads?

[penguininablender]

to the owner of a 1997 , silver, ori ship parked on the west side of the sgc...your lights are on

[dancer_4_daniel]

Daniel: Felger, will you stop singing "Foxy Lady" everytime Sam walks by? It's getting to be just plain creepy now...You can also stop doing the Wayne's World dance with it too...