things you would not want to hear on the SGC's intercom

[Eragon]

- We're cutting Rodney off of coffee
- My bolgna has a first name....
- No one will no we where here
- dont push that button, im rewiring the self destruct.

[Mimzy]

Doof: Someone told me that Perry the Platypus was here... but this is just a normal platypus.

Perry: *gurgle* <Phew! That was close.>

[AtlantisRules!!!]

Perry: *gurgle* <Phew! That was close.>

*bends down to pick up a small detective hat* Awwww! Wouldn't this look so cute on the Platypus? *puts it on Parry*
Doof: *gasp* Perry the Platypus!

[Mimzy]

Perry: *GURGLE* *opens mouth and random laser shoots out*
Doof: AAAHHG! *disappears*

[AtlantisRules!!!]

[Mimzy]

Perry: *takes off hat* *gurgle*
Pigeon: Coo-coo coo. <Well done, my friend!>

[GSRgategirl923]

Wha--?!?
Perry:Gurgle <Its a long story>

-No one is paying attention to -
No, seriously where do all these people keep comming from?

[timstro59]

*We are the Borg. Lower your shields and surrender your ships. We will add your biological and technological distinctiveness to our own. Your culture will adapt to service us. Resistance is futile.*

[Mimzy]

Wha--?!?
Perry:Gurgle <Its a long story>

-No one is paying attention to -
No, seriously where do all these people keep comming from?

Me: The Broom Closet is a portal from another dimension.

[GSRgategirl923]

Oh okay, as long as there's a logical explanation.

[HAL2100]

Carter: We've just detected a meteor containing a brown dwarf on a collision course with the Moon. The resultant impact will cause the Moon to crash into the Earth in 39 days.

[Kirdy_Mulder]

Ladies and gentlemen from the SG... Hereby I announce my retirement and introduce Siler as my successor. God bless all of you!

[Lt.Cassandra Blue]

someone singing: "vampires are aliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive....the story had to surviiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive"

[GSRgategirl923]

Ladies and gentlemen from the SG... Hereby I announce my retirement and introduce Siler as my successor. God bless all of you!

Uhm..Where's Siler??
I think he may have died a good 20 pages back...
Siler:I did.
But then how are you here?
Siler:Plot hole.

[sueKay]

Landry: Attention all personnel. Due to the popularity of the SGC curry night, we now have a major blockage in the base's plumbing. Siler, bring your wetsuit.