I'm not sure if it's a rule, but as Fems says, it ought to be. I would go with what your beta says. As others have pointed out, if nothing else, it's less confusing and looks better. In your original example, it could very well be O'Neill clearing his throat and then someone else interjecting their thoughts.
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sigpicSig by Bay, for my birthday. Find me on fanfiction.net, AO3, or fictionpress.com. If you are over 18, I invite you to read my blogs. On Blogger: Other Worlds, Other Loves On Wordpress: Other Worlds, Other Loves.Fennyman: "Who is that?" Henslowe: "Nobody. The author." (From Shakespeare in Love)
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Originally posted by Sealurk View PostFems: I would write the second example (can't seem to quote the quoted text at the moment).
Originally posted by Sealurk View PostI start new dialogue on a new paragraph, but I don't break it into separate paragraphs just because there is a line of non-dialogue in the middle, as long as it remains the same speaker.
Originally posted by Sealurk View PostLike Mathpiglet said, I was always taught new speaker, new paragraph. However, reading that source, I'm still possibly in the wrong as the following would appear to be correct.
Originally posted by Sealurk View PostFor some reason, I've always seen this as looking clumsy and wrong, but apparently not. I must just be reading the wrong sort of books!
Originally posted by Whytewytch View PostI'm not sure if it's a rule, but as Fems says, it ought to be. I would go with what your beta says. As others have pointed out, if nothing else, it's less confusing and looks better. In your original example, it could very well be O'Neill clearing his throat and then someone else interjecting their thoughts.Unmade Plans (WIP: 11/20):
Sam's life takes a turn in an unexpected direction when she's faced with an unplanned pregnancy. The decision to keep the baby and raise it on her own will alter her life forever. Relationships are put to the test, especially the one between her and Jack. She doesn't know what to expect from him and he surprises her at every turn.
On FFnet or AO3
My S/J fics can be found on FFnet and AO3. I also tweet and tumble about the ship and my writing/stories.
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Originally posted by Sealurk View PostI'm reading a copy of my latest fic that has been edited and returned by a beta, and I've run into a bit of an issue.
The bulk of my knowledge regarding proper English comes from just reading a lot and slowly developing a sense of what is correct or incorrect rather than from formal education. Admittedly, this isn't ideal for a writer and has led to me being a little ignorant of some rules and developing a few bad habits.
The problem is that with this edited fic, I'm having a little difficulty picking apart what is genuinely grammatically incorrect and what is simply personal style or preference. For example, I've always started dialogue in a new paragraph:
O'Neill leaned forward and cleared his throat.
"I've always thought there was something wrong with that." ...whereas the beta repeatedly corrects it to:
O'Neill leaned forward and cleared his throat. "I've always thought there was something wrong with that."
Is either one of us actually incorrect or is it just a matter of personal preference?
Jack said,
"I've always thought there was something wrong with that."
would you?
The rule for beginning a new paragraph for dialogue only applies to separating one person's speech from another, so that you don't have two characters speaking in the same paragraph.Sum, ergo scribo...
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Explore Colonel Frank Cromwell's odyssey after falling through the Stargate in Season Two's A Matter of Time, and follow Jack's search for him. Significant Tok'ra supporting characters and a human culture drawn from the annals of history. Book One of the series By Honor Bound.
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As much as I find the Tok'ra to be a great source of plot twists, I can't figure out which of their council would be best to use as a representative to speak on their behalf (or, heck, which of them would be dead by this time in the series).
The time is set a few months after the end of Atlantis and the representative is there to sign a peace treaty.Price for Pain What do you mean violence isn't the answer?
Burn It All Away Blood moves the heavens. Fire purifies the land. Legends change worlds. Destiny burns.
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot Fiat justitia et pereat mundus. Fiat justitia ruat caelum.
All are PG-13, each with a single act of rated R violence. Adults situations and other, tamer violence.
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Nice discussion on the grammar rules, all! I was paying rapt attention.sigpic
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"When Colonel Maybourne and yourself were stranded off world, Major Carter felt a similar sense of frustration. She despaired at the thought of never seeing you again." ~Teal'c
"I didn't leave,because I'd have rather died myself,than lose Carter." ~Jack O'Neill
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Originally posted by WraithRichard View PostAs much as I find the Tok'ra to be a great source of plot twists, I can't figure out which of their council would be best to use as a representative to speak on their behalf (or, heck, which of them would be dead by this time in the series).
The time is set a few months after the end of Atlantis and the representative is there to sign a peace treaty.
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Originally posted by Skydiver View Postgarshaw. Or they used Persus one time, or just make one up who happens to be Selmac's replacement. For all we know the council's membership changes regularly as Tok'ra die. Or maybe they only serve on the council for a period of time?Price for Pain What do you mean violence isn't the answer?
Burn It All Away Blood moves the heavens. Fire purifies the land. Legends change worlds. Destiny burns.
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot Fiat justitia et pereat mundus. Fiat justitia ruat caelum.
All are PG-13, each with a single act of rated R violence. Adults situations and other, tamer violence.
Ficta voluptatis causa sint proxima veris
I'm creating a fan comic and I want input from as many fans as possible. Please PM me if you want the discord link. You can also chat, show off your own creations, and rp.
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Any speculation as to what Mark Carter does for a living? I always imagined him as intelligent and accomplished, but don't want to necessarily write him into a role too similar to Sam's -I don't want to make him an Astrophysicist or anything. Just searching for any opinions, regardless of what I choose to go with.sigpic
sig by Ikorni
"When Colonel Maybourne and yourself were stranded off world, Major Carter felt a similar sense of frustration. She despaired at the thought of never seeing you again." ~Teal'c
"I didn't leave,because I'd have rather died myself,than lose Carter." ~Jack O'Neill
SaraBahama FanFic; AO3
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Originally posted by SaraBahama View PostAny speculation as to what Mark Carter does for a living? I always imagined him as intelligent and accomplished, but don't want to necessarily write him into a role too similar to Sam's -I don't want to make him an Astrophysicist or anything. Just searching for any opinions, regardless of what I choose to go with.
Other than that Mark could have any other conceivable job.No Sam w/o a Jack and no Jack w/o a Sam.
It's like and immutable law of the multiverse.
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Originally posted by SaraBahama View PostAny speculation as to what Mark Carter does for a living? I always imagined him as intelligent and accomplished, but don't want to necessarily write him into a role too similar to Sam's -I don't want to make him an Astrophysicist or anything. Just searching for any opinions, regardless of what I choose to go with.
You also have to keep in mind that he's buddies with Pete, who was living in Denver while Mark was living San Diego where he'd moved to some time before Cold Lazarus and with the boy and girl (~5 years old in Seth) already born. I always thought Mark looked like a computer geek from the brief glimpse we got from him, but he could also be a lawyer, forensic specialist or a shrink and met Pete on a case they were both working on. Unless Mark had been living in/around Denver too and happened to meet Pete coincidentally. Or they met at university/college or a specialized course that Pete the detective had to attend.Unmade Plans (WIP: 11/20):
Sam's life takes a turn in an unexpected direction when she's faced with an unplanned pregnancy. The decision to keep the baby and raise it on her own will alter her life forever. Relationships are put to the test, especially the one between her and Jack. She doesn't know what to expect from him and he surprises her at every turn.
On FFnet or AO3
My S/J fics can be found on FFnet and AO3. I also tweet and tumble about the ship and my writing/stories.
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I somehow figured that Mark was as different as possible from the military life embraced by his sister and father.
Professor of Philosophy or art critic or author or highschool English Teacher. I'd keep him as far from math and science as possible.
That way I could see why Jacob and Mark are not close. They would struggle to find something to talk about.Calculus and Alcohol don't mix. Never drink and derive.
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Thanks all! That gives me some different perspective to draw from...sigpic
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"When Colonel Maybourne and yourself were stranded off world, Major Carter felt a similar sense of frustration. She despaired at the thought of never seeing you again." ~Teal'c
"I didn't leave,because I'd have rather died myself,than lose Carter." ~Jack O'Neill
SaraBahama FanFic; AO3
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Has anyone got any theories as to what Cassandra did/has done after High School?
Or what happend after Janet died?"What do you mean by 'Oopps'?"
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According to a missing scene from Ripple Effect:
Spoiler:Scene 26: Green Daniel and Green Teal'c interview Desert Camo Fraiser
This was a great little scene reuniting Teal'c and Daniel with Fraiser (albeit an alternate version of the good doctor). Again, due to time constraints, we had to lose some references to Cassie. Here is the exchange as originally scripted:
GREEN ##TEAL'C: You have been greatly missed.
Suddenly, she realizes -
DESERT CAMO FRAISER: How's Cassie?
GREEN DANIEL: She's fine. She moved in with Sam after it happened.
DESERT CAMO FRAISER: I can't imagine what she must have gone through.
GREEN DANIEL: It was tough for her -- but she got through it. She managed to deal with her loss by focusing on her studies.(beat) She's majoring in Biochemistry at UCLA.
Desert Camo Fraiser can't help but smile.
DESERT CAMO FRAISER: She's doing well back home too.(then, catching herself) I mean -- my home.
GREEN TEAL'C: Hopefully you will be able to return to her shortly.
DESERT CAMO FRAISER: Hopefully?
GREEN DANIEL: For the moment, it looks like your trip here was only one-way.
Don't recall who pointed this out a couple of weeks ago, sorry, I just saved it.Unmade Plans (WIP: 11/20):
Sam's life takes a turn in an unexpected direction when she's faced with an unplanned pregnancy. The decision to keep the baby and raise it on her own will alter her life forever. Relationships are put to the test, especially the one between her and Jack. She doesn't know what to expect from him and he surprises her at every turn.
On FFnet or AO3
My S/J fics can be found on FFnet and AO3. I also tweet and tumble about the ship and my writing/stories.
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