Convention Etiquette: Discussion and Advice on Do's and Don'ts

[discodiva]

I seem to remember being told horror stories of a young lady (and I use the term in it's broadest sense) who would bring her pet iguana to cons.

This was despite being asked, repeatedly, not to by con organisers.

Ring any bells with anyone?

Oh dear....nope - no bells rung....but it does remind me of the fan who sat close behind me last year in Van who "miaow-ed" every time Jason Mamoa came on stage during the Cabaret!!...


Deeds xx

[BruTak]

It actually came as quite a surprise to me the change in the fans when I attended a Buffy con in Glasgow some years ago.

I was used to the old Glasgow Star Trek cons, where the guests would be greeted with polite applause and cheering etc.

At the Buffy con, I was almost deafend by the collective screaming of the squeee-brigade when a male cast member (J. August Richards for example) came on stage.

[prion]

I seem to remember being told horror stories of a young lady (and I use the term in it's broadest sense) who would bring her pet iguana to cons.

This was despite being asked, repeatedly, not to by con organisers.

Ring any bells with anyone?

Well, if told not to bring the pet iguana, I can see the problem, but what's wrong with lizards? They're neat.

However, I do recall some fan at the past NJ CCs who would yell out a room number all the time. Got to be...er, what's the word? Um, uh, oh yeah, ANNOYING!

[Arctic Goddess]

Oh dear....nope - no bells rung....but it does remind me of the fan who sat close behind me last year in Van who "miaow-ed" every time Jason Mamoa came on stage during the Cabaret!!...


Deeds xx

I remember that, Deeds, and thinking that I felt sorry for whoever was sitting around the weird "cat lady". There always has to be at least one idiot at every convention.

[Chelle DB]

OK...i have a question with regards to the con etiquette thing...FF posted a link to "Con behavior -clues for free"...and one of the comments was:

DO NOT TOUCH PEOPLE WITHOUT PERMISSION. Even if you know them.

I just need to know something with regard to this...say I know someone...must I ask them repeatedly if I can hug them or touch them...as in a non sexual or threatening way??
You see, when I meet up with folks at the cons I go to, well, we all run and hug each other...and occasionally I put my hand on their arms in a friendly manner...but is that overstepping the boundary??
Am I really doing something wrong??
Coz when I go to Gabit later this year, I'd like to think that I wont have to ask over and over again if it is alright to touch someone just because I'm not married to them.
Since reading this, it's really been bugging me. I'm not an overly touchy feeling person...but I don't want to offend anyone when we meet. But I also don't want to come across as being standoff-ish or anything like that.

[Jersey13]

I don't see why anything is wrong with that, if you're comfortable with someone's presence and vice versa. It's just that some people have problems respecting other people's personal space and boundaries. Not everybody is comfortable with personal contact, even actors, and it's best to ask them for permission if you want a hug at your photo op or something of the sort. A lot of "glomping" goes on at some conventions, too. That's when someone unexpectedly and without any warning runs up to someone, typically a cosplayer or celebrity guest, and forcibly grabs them in a very strong hug. This is exactly the sort of situation that people who aren't fond of a lot of physical contact are afraid of, and it happens all too often, unfortunately.

[slamaina]

I sure hope they were not GateWorld members. I'd hate to think that people who post on these forums would be that immature.

Some were GateWorld members.

It worked out for me though because if I had hung with them I would not have met the great group that I now hang with. Since that Con I have gone to two Cons with them and will be hanging out with them in Vancouver.

Age doesn't preclude bad behaviour sadly - nor does belonging to one particular on-line group/forum.....rudeness/immature behaviour can strike anywhere.......I have seen such behaviour from people who post elsewhere and on here, and in all aspects of the fandom's factions - I also have friends from on-line groups outside of GW who are great fans of MS who would no more think of behaving like the group you met than flying!!...


My apologies for not recalling our meeting straight off....2008 was a hectic con for me.....I was with a small group of very close friends that I've had since I joined GW and my husband was not as well as usual, so I spent a lot of time "being spread around thinly"....many faces blurred into one over that weekend and I'm sure there are others I may claim to have not met when I already had.....

Deeds xx

Deeds - We met, we didn't hang out. If and when we meet again you will most likely remember seeing me at another Con.

OK...i have a question with regards to the con etiquette thing...FF posted a link to "Con behavior -clues for free"...and one of the comments was:

I just need to know something with regard to this...say I know someone...must I ask them repeatedly if I can hug them or touch them...as in a non sexual or threatening way??
You see, when I meet up with folks at the cons I go to, well, we all run and hug each other...and occasionally I put my hand on their arms in a friendly manner...but is that overstepping the boundary??
Am I really doing something wrong??
Coz when I go to Gabit later this year, I'd like to think that I wont have to ask over and over again if it is alright to touch someone just because I'm not married to them.
Since reading this, it's really been bugging me. I'm not an overly touchy feeling person...but I don't want to offend anyone when we meet. But I also don't want to come across as being standoff-ish or anything like that.

I think that with touching, it is a matter of reading people, paying attention. If you run and hug someone who ran to you and hugged you at the same time. There is no need to ask. If someone is touching you in a friendly manner, it is fine to do it to them.

But, for the talent/actors, I would always ask. They are getting compensated for being there. I am not saying that they are not glad to interact with their fans but don't confuse that with some sort of personal bond. Plus, it is always better to err on the side of being too polite.

Slam

[BruTak]

I don't see why anything is wrong with that, if you're comfortable with someone's presence and vice versa. It's just that some people have problems respecting other people's personal space and boundaries. Not everybody is comfortable with personal contact, even actors, and it's best to ask them for permission if you want a hug at your photo op or something of the sort. A lot of "glomping" goes on at some conventions, too. That's when someone unexpectedly and without any warning runs up to someone, typically a cosplayer or celebrity guest, and forcibly grabs them in a very strong hug. This is exactly the sort of situation that people who aren't fond of a lot of physical contact are afraid of, and it happens all too often, unfortunately.

Any silly bugger tries that at a con where SG-999 are security, they get a facefull of floor and their hands cuffed behind their backs.

Two words ladies and germs - Tactial Takedown.

[Sa'Hut_IH']

Any silly bugger tries that at a con where SG-999 are security, they get a facefull of floor and their hands cuffed behind their backs.

Two words ladies and germs - Tactial Takedown.

I LOVE tactical takedowns!!

ask the drunk man in NJ a few years back what happens when you grab one of Mama's protectees and try to climb him... wasnt pretty (and thankfully dont happen often)

[ScifigirlSG]

I LOVE tactical takedowns!!

ask the drunk man in NJ a few years back what happens when you grab one of Mama's protectees and try to climb him... wasnt pretty (and thankfully dont happen often)

I hope it wasn't Saki(sp?) cuz he does resemble Lani Tupu.

[Frostfox]

Any silly bugger tries that at a con where SG-999 are security, they get a facefull of floor and their hands cuffed behind their backs.

Two words ladies and germs - Tactial Takedown.

Many (oh, many, many years ago, the early 80's) a rather the worse the wear Scottish fan was bothering my friend Gytha at an Albacon (at the Central, wonderful hotel). She put him in his place (with typical Gytha scything words). By the next time we were up in Scotland, the story had snowballed so much that not only had she supposedly hospitalised him, but she'd refused to send flowers to the funeral.

It's amazing what a reputation can do for you.

Not that Gytha (42nd Squad and Brighton Vike and Aikido) couldn't have wiped the floor with the oik, she just didn't need to.

FF

[BruTak]

Many (oh, many, many years ago, the early 80's) a rather the worse the wear Scottish fan was bothering my friend Gytha at an Albacon (at the Central, wonderful hotel). She put him in his place (with typical Gytha scything words). By the next time we were up in Scotland, the story had snowballed so much that not only had she supposedly hospitalised him, but she'd refused to send flowers to the funeral.

Oh God. I think I know the guy you're talking about.

He didn't have a two headed Beeble-bear with him, did he?

[Frostfox]

Oh God. I think I know the guy you're talking about.

He didn't have a two headed Beeble-bear with him, did he?

Nope (and I know who you mean ) I think this was pre-beeble bears being on sale at cons, hard as that is to imagine. I can't remember the fan's name, he wasn't a BNF just a drunken Glaswegian, mostly harmless, hence her not actually having to put him through a wall.
Gytha could be well scary, I once saw her take down Harlan Ellison. In case you are wondering, Terry P stole her name for one of his witches, before he knew her very well (just well enough to phone and ask if he could nick her name!). He later admitted that Gytha was much, much more like Granny Weatherwax than Nanny Og.

FF

[BruTak]

You know the inafamous Jimmy "Maltman" McPaul?

Blimey, it's a small world an no mistake.

Did you know the mad bugger went and climbed Kilimanjaro a year or so ago?

[ScifigirlSG]

Isn't that what the internet is for? SInce joining the net community way back, I"ve seen all sorts of bad behavior. ANd it's definitely not contained to fans of TV shows. Professionals can be just as bad if not worse.

Didn't Al Gore claim he invented the internet? We can blame him.