Convention Etiquette: Discussion and Advice on Do's and Don'ts

[Arctic Goddess]

It's not that my voice doesn't carry. I have a deep voice, and I can shout loud if I want to. It's also not the case that I was shy. I was as relaxed as ever, not a bit nervous. It's only that I was politely waiting and didn't want to interupt an ongoing conversation.

And since they were talking about "Legend" wich I haven't seen so far I also wasn't able to step in at some point and saying "Yeah, that's my opinon also, and then..." *shrugs* Well, next time.

And I just want to add, if it sounded that I somehow excluded Amanda here, that's of course not the case. I also like her very much, but had met her before already, and definitely wasn't able to follow two conversations that took place at the same time in this situation.

I'm with you. I was raised that it's impolite to interrupt, which seems to give the rude people the advantage. However, distracting the rude person by placing your hand on their arm, then beginning your question can work well.

[GermanAstra]

However, distracting the rude person by placing your hand on their arm, then beginning your question can work well.

There were several people between us, it was a large table. No chance to reach over. We weren't allowed to stand up either.

I agree we should have talked about this whole thing beforehand. But since this wasn't an issue at any convention I had been before I didn't even think of the possibility.

But I don't want to whine anymore, what's done is done. I just wanted to protect others from the same experience, and I think we collected some good advices about this matter, how to do it right.

I especially like the one about teaming up with a friend.

[Verona]

This is tricky because in any situation where there is a mix of people some will always be more vocal than others, hopefully anyone who is maybe unsure or more restrained will know this going in and be prepared. It will be clear who is most lightly to dominate the table if you chat before hand (IMO)so the suggestion of discussing what will happen when the guests reach you is a good one if you think you may be a little shy let everyone know you want to ask guest 1 such and such, If all goes well everyone will be thinking of their table mates needs as well as their own. Of course life has shown me that some people don't care one jot what anyone else wants and will go all out to hog the whole thing for themselves in that case any one shy is gonna lose out big time sad to say.

[Skydiver]

That's especially true for the character actors that portray the recurring characters. I went to one con, and there was a group of there mainly to meet each other plus meet a particular actor. He was absolutely delighted to have people that knew his career besides Stargate. Tho' he was a little frightened I believe.

if you guys want a convo starter, run the actor you're gonna see through IMDB, see what else they've done, and you can at l east ask them about it, or have something else to go looking for.

I was with somene once that was talking to tom mcbeath...and all he kept asking him was about rda and what it was like to work with rick. And i felt so uncomfortable cause there's more to tom than his ex-co-workers

there's nothing wrong with 'throwing the actors a bone'...like say y ou're lucky enough to sit next to the actor. and you and the other table people have been chatting, waiting for him/her to arrive. Well, after you have your moment, say 'you know, jean over here is from texas' or something. give them an 'in' to each other.

One thing to avoid....folks, leave politics out of it. Don't put the actor on the spot with 'what do you think about saving the whales' or 'who do you like for president' or other stuff like that. don't put them on the spot.

oh, and for gifts. my personal preference?

something personal, such as a hand written thank you or postcard from your home town or something - minus any suggestive content please. dn't be a git.

something small. they gotta cram all this crud in their luggage if they keep it so don't saddle them with junk to haul home...or feel guilty about throwing away

non-edible. do NOT give them food. Ain't safe. Now, let's say that you and 3 other fans find out that actor A loves cadbury's chocolates....buy then a gift card to order some chocolates so that you can give it to them, they don't have to carry it home, it comes from a 'safe' source.

but honestly, you don't gotta buy them anything. What i think would mean more to them than any gift is you, treating them like a 'normal' person and getting ot know them and allowing them to get to know you, as real people

[TuesdayRain]

but honestly, you don't gotta buy them anything. What i think would mean more to them than any gift is you, treating them like a 'normal' person and getting ot know them and allowing them to get to know you, as real people

One of the best things I've heard on this forum! People are people. Whether someone's famous or not, treat everyone as you would like to be treated and fairly.

[Skydiver]

at the end of the day, they ARE real people...just with really cool jobs

they go home and do the laundry and hit the grocery and whine when thier cable cuts out and have to get the oil changed in their car...and wear ugly bridesmaids dresses (there was a photo in people, kathryn heigl of grey's anatomy was a bridesmaid for her sister)

they're just people, and in the case of some actors, - like rick - he's far, far more scared of us than we are of him.

[Arctic Goddess]

at the end of the day, they ARE real people...just with really cool jobs

they go home and do the laundry and hit the grocery and whine when thier cable cuts out and have to get the oil changed in their car...and wear ugly bridesmaids dresses (there was a photo in people, kathryn heigl of grey's anatomy was a bridesmaid for her sister)

they're just people, and in the case of some actors, - like rick - he's far, far more scared of us than we are of him.

LOL!!! It's hard to see Colonel O'Neill afraid of us. But I know what you mean. I do wish there was a thread on GW about fans personal experiences with the actors. For example, I had a wonderful chat with Jay Acovone at the Chicago convention in August. I'd love to hear about other people's experiences.

[Skydiver]

colonel O'Neill might not be. but richard dean anderson is.

If you want to start a 'I talked to...... at a convention' thread, go for it.

Or 'Close encounters with....' thread. We'll just need to make it known that this isn't the place for improper types of rumors (in other words, i don't want a groupie type 'brag how close i got' thread)

Maybe something along the line of 'I went to a con and I talked to....'

adn folks can share thier actor close encounters

[Arctic Goddess]

Thanks for that, Skydiver. Any suggestions about which board would be most appropriate?

[GermanAstra]

This one of course? Since all the convention discussions are here, anyway?

I would love to read other's special moments, also.

[Skydiver]

Thanks for that, Skydiver. Any suggestions about which board would be most appropriate?

I'd say right here in fandom. Fandom is where the con treads are, so it's a perfect place for 'I went to a con and talked to...' or whatever catchy name you come up with

[prion]

oh, and for gifts. my personal preference?

something personal, such as a hand written thank you or postcard from your home town or something - minus any suggestive content please. dn't be a git.

something small. they gotta cram all this crud in their luggage if they keep it so don't saddle them with junk to haul home...or feel guilty about throwing away

non-edible. do NOT give them food. Ain't safe. Now, let's say that you and 3 other fans find out that actor A loves cadbury's chocolates....buy then a gift card to order some chocolates so that you can give it to them, they don't have to carry it home, it comes from a 'safe' source.

but honestly, you don't gotta buy them anything. What i think would mean more to them than any gift is you, treating them like a 'normal' person and getting ot know them and allowing them to get to know you, as real people

If you're thinking about giving an actor a gift, think about this: he/she has to bring it home. Actors have often said on talk shows that they might ahve remarked they liked "elephants" and the next thing you know, fans are flooding them with elephants.

It would be great to get to know the actor but if you do creations, you got like 20 seconds in the autograph line

[prion]

Any thoughts about fans presenting gifts to the actors while they're on stage during the q&a?

Never do that. I've seen it done, more times than I care to remember, and the actor usually feels they must accept it, and it takes out time from a valuable question that yes, all those people standing in line off to the side, might have wanted answered. Gifts are for the autograph, where the actor and/or rep can stick it behind the table. Not to rant, no, wait, I am ranting.

Most cons have rules spelled out very clearly about this, but some folks still do it. Sigh...

[BlueJello]

but honestly, you don't gotta buy them anything. What i think would mean more to them than any gift is you, treating them like a 'normal' person and getting ot know them and allowing them to get to know you, as real people

There was this movie, I think it was called "Guarding Tess" with Nicholas Cage and Shirley MacLaine who played a former first lady. Whenever she walked into the local grocery store, the clerk would ask the bodyguard, does she want to be "recognized" that day or to be left alone. I thought that was considerate.

But you know, when you're at a convention with several hundred other people and a certain few vying for attention (not me, I promise), the reality is that there really is no way to get to really know a guest. The guests are probably well guarded by their handlers. LOL. But it would be great though to just sit and chat with them like anyone else. At Chicago this year, I heard that the elevator broke and the first thing that came to my mind was -- darn, if only I was on that broken elevator with a guest. That would have been pretty cool! LOL.

[Arctic Goddess]

There was this movie, I think it was called "Guarding Tess" with Nicholas Cage and Shirley MacLaine who played a former first lady. Whenever she walked into the local grocery store, the clerk would ask the bodyguard, does she want to be "recognized" that day or to be left alone. I thought that was considerate.

But you know, when you're at a convention with several hundred other people and a certain few vying for attention (not me, I promise), the reality is that there really is no way to get to really know a guest. The guests are probably well guarded by their handlers. LOL. But it would be great though to just sit and chat with them like anyone else. At Chicago this year, I heard that the elevator broke and the first thing that came to my mind was -- darn, if only I was on that broken elevator with a guest. That would have been pretty cool! LOL.

The elevator broke? Was that the one to the four floors on the right hand side of the hotel? If so, it broke before the con and people were either using the stairs or another elevator down the hall. Now if the one to the tower broke, and Cliff was in it, well, they could definitely take their sweet time fixing it.