GABIT attendees thread

[EH-T]

I went to AT3 alone AND didn't know anyone. I met so many wonderful people to spend time chatting with. The hotel construction I guess made it more difficult this year (people told me) so I did spend some time by myself but I enjoy that to. I go alot of places by myself (not married). If I always waited for a time when my friends could also go, I'd miss out on alot of my trips. And my family/friends, lets just say, don't share my love of all things Amanda or Stargate, heh.

So Chelle, you go girl! And DON'T let those who are trying to make you feel guilty about going get you down. You tell them this is for your mental health and in the long run will be better foryou and your family. It will teach your children that everyone deserves time for themselves, Moms and Dads included. It's also a good lesson for your daughter that she to is entitled to think of herself first. You can't always put others before yourself. If you do, eventually, there won't be anything left of YOU to give.

LilFerret,
I also went on my own to London before meeting up with family and friends on the continent. I think that the only time I spent alone the whole weekend was when sleeping. Very easy to hook up with people, all you have to do is see the AT badge and start talking. Besides, we will be setting something up through GW to meet up as a group.

Chelle,
Erin, Scifithinker and Celandine are all correct. We have a tendancy to define ourselves by our relationship to others: wife, mother, daughter, etc. While these are all important we cannot forget that we are also independent individuals. We are often so busy tending to others that we forget to tend to ourselves. It is not selfish to do so. Erin is right, in the long run it is better for us and everyone around us.

Funny story from AT3. Gabit was selling badges with various "Sam sayings" on them. Proceeds to the hearing dogs. The morning after the auction I was looking through the basket and decided to buy one that said "What's a girl to do?" Starflight happened by right at that moment and said "You're going to keep your purchase this time, right? You should keep something for yourself!" Whenever I saw her thereafter she kept asking if I still had my badge! (Still do by the way)

[LilFerret]

Well as you know Samandans have a certain reputation

I have NO idea what you're referring too...*twitches*




And HA...Ames had five million of those badges.

[Erin13]

Gah..we talked before the con but I never did run into you at all. Glad you had fun though and next year (if I go) I'll definitely make sure I find you.


OT spoilers up and blinking!!

Spoiler:

I've been feeling a bit down for quite a few days. Some rl cr..p happened recently and changed everything for me. Been a hard crawl upwards and I know I'm not there yet, but the dirt 'neath my nails is proof I havent given up.

Yesterday I watched 'Fragile Balance' again. I sooo love that ep. Michael Welch did such a great job with getting Jack's mannerisms and expressions down pat. I laughed my way throughout the whole thing which was cool since I havent cracked a smile in a long time. I love Stargate.

Went out mt. biking today with some friends to Starved Rock and had an awesome time. We biked and climbed some of the boulders and just laid around being bums. I'm exhausted now, but in the best way possible. I'm off now to re-watch the rest of S7 and just chill. *sigh*

You MUST go next year because we missed each other this year. Did you ever get your Indian food? The restaurant in my book was at the consierge desk and they would come pick you up for 5 pounds gas money. Consierge said food was really good.

Chin up! Keep clawing away....dirt under my fingernails right now too so I know what you mean. RL sucks sometimes, but coming here helps. If you stand on my shoulders a bit, then your hands get a rest from clawing away I've got broad shoulders...but bad knees

Love Fragile Balance too. If Michael Welch hadn't been as good as he was then that ep would have fallen flat. He was awesome! It just makes you smile. I love when they go to wake up O'Neill at his house. RDA cracks me up, all crunched in bed like that, ha!

Hang in there C!!!!

[Skydiver]

chelle

at the end you have to do what you feel is right, but i will say this...my sis and my bro in law have a good marriage...and part of that i think is because they know to take time apart. He does stuff without her, she does stuff without him. he'll take the baby while she runs, she'll take the baby and let him hang with the guys.

sometimes a relationship needs a little time out.

AGain, you gotta do what you feel is right and what the both of you can live with, but 'separation makes the heart grow fonder' is a cliche for a reason

[scifithinker]

Part of me wants to go alone (only because I'd like to just hang with my friends, for once)...but the other part of me is worried I will be alone more than with friends. And that part sucks.

How much time you spend alone is wholly up to you. I'm an introvert, so I need time alone to recharge, but I was having so much fun at AT3, I think a shower in the morning sufficed.

That remains to be seen. Most of the time I feel like an outsider.

My friends and family here don't share the interest, that's for sure.

My family doesn't get it at all. I've been working on them for years, though, and I got a kick out of my mom's telling my new sister-in-law about my then upcoming trip. When I was worried about money and the exchange rate, she told me in no uncertain terms that I had to go.

My parents and my sibs think it's weird, but they know how good fandom is for me.

[LilFerret]

How much time you spend alone is wholly up to you. I'm an introvert, so I need time alone to recharge, but I was having so much fun at AT3, I think a shower in the morning sufficed.

As long as I have a way to get in touch with people I'll be fine.

My family doesn't get it at all. I've been working on them for years, though, and I got a kick out of my mom's telling my new sister-in-law about my then upcoming trip. When I was worried about money and the exchange rate, she told me in no uncertain terms that I had to go.

My parents and my sibs think it's weird, but they know how good fandom is for me.

My grandma spent over three hours going through pics with me...and she didn't even SEE the AT3 pix...just London itself and the rest of Europe. And then we went to my parents' house and left the CDs there so they could view it all at their leisure. LOL

My mom has her Moody Blues thing (touring all around going to concerts. I used to too, but haven't in years) and I have my Stargate thing.

[ames]

I have NO idea what you're referring too...*twitches*

And HA...Ames had five million of those badges.

Well, only about 26 or so, but close enough
The girls said they could hear me coming ... LOL!
Lemme tell ya though - my lanyard sure was heavy by the end of the weekend!

chelle: do the trip hun. Family time is great, but sometimes you need to do stuff on your own - and if travelling on your own is something you really want to do, then grab the opportunity. I've learned over the past few years that sometimes you need to throw your safety net out the window, and take the opportunities - see where you land afterwards and work from there. There are so many things I didn't take the time to do/see while I was in the UK for various reasons that seemed so sensible at the time ... and I'm totally kicking myself for not grabbing those chances in hindsight.

Cel: *hugs* for the current cr*ptastic RL sitch. Keep clawing, and you will survive.

Lilferret: worry not! I don't think you'd ever have to be alone at a con if you didn't want to be. I did manage to find some alone time when I needed it, but I also was able to find someone with whom to chat pretty much any other time ... then again, I talk a fair bit. But moving right along... very glad to see you expanding your posting zones -- I missed our convos back in the Sanctuary!

...and in other news: my mother is now officially hooked on Stargate. Next step, get her hooked on the awesomeness that is Amanda! Then I convince her to plan our trip to the UK to coincide with AT4 ... and ames is good to go! LOL - I know, not asking for much there, eh? Yeah ... but a girl can dream!

[LilFerret]

but a girl can dream!

Ah yes, we do a fair amount of that...

[Mousie]

How much time you spend alone is wholly up to you. I'm an introvert, so I need time alone to recharge, but I was having so much fun at AT3, I think a shower in the morning sufficed.



My family doesn't get it at all. I've been working on them for years, though, and I got a kick out of my mom's telling my new sister-in-law about my then upcoming trip. When I was worried about money and the exchange rate, she told me in no uncertain terms that I had to go.

My parents and my sibs think it's weird, but they know how good fandom is for me.

Nor do mine and I get lots of gentle teasing about it, particularly from my sister and her boyfriend. I know a few others who are into sci fi but they have their preferences like Star Wars and Angel, not Stargate.

I don't buy much merchandise but I do have a thing for the set used costumes and love the Gabit events for the fact that Legends are there. I usually end up buying a piece at each event and my mum says to me "you spent how much on a tee shirt?!" And I reply that it's not like I go out boozing my moeny away each week. And then I point to my older sister and say "yeah well......she's just spend £3500 on a horse and another £3000 on a horse box so go and moan at her"!

Parents!

[becky_preen]

Chelle, I have a hubby who is sooooo not into stargate it's unbelieveable. He has never been to a convention ( even one of ours). But we have a good solid relationship and we each do things for ourselves. We don't have kids to worry about but we do have a dog... which is sometimes worse ( more difficult to find a baby sitter!)

Planning and reassurance is the key. if hubby is worried about how he'll cope try and find out what he's worried about. is it the cooking? the cleaning? keeping the kids schedule? You should make some lists and have a plan for him. cook like crazy and have meals in the freezer all labeled up with re-heat instructions and stuff. Do all the laundry in sight so they have clean clothes for the time you are away. show them how to use the washer ( if they don't already know!) Leave instructions.

Accept that the house will probably be a mess when you get back. tell hubby that's okay but it would be nice if it wasn't. take some of the pressure off him. This is a great bonding oppotunity for him to be with the kids and either way he will gain a new apreciation of everything that you do.

Talk to your kids too, this is probably a big thing for them too cos mummy is going sooooo far away for a while. You obviously do so much in thier lives that it could be unsettleing. but it's an adventure for all of you. You for the travelling and them to gain a little bit of independance. Show them on a map where you are going. Be open about it. show them how excited you are about going and how excited you will be to come back and tell them all about it. Make that clear, you are coming back... kids can get the wrong idea sometimes.

If you have family locally, a parent or sibling then enlist thier help as a back up, they don't need to be you and step in, but in case hubby needs a babysitter at short notice, make some plans for him. But really hun, he should be fine. It's a long ways off and they will all be a year older by them too.

Don't give up on your dreams. We all need to do things for ourselves occasionally. It doesn't mean we are selfish. it just shows we value ourselves, which means we become better people for those around us.

hugs
Becks

[EH-T]

Well, only about 26 or so, but close enough
The girls said they could hear me coming ... LOL!
Lemme tell ya though - my lanyard sure was heavy by the end of the weekend!

I had trouble deciding which one to buy. Your solution was to buy them all!

...and in other news: my mother is now officially hooked on Stargate. Next step, get her hooked on the awesomeness that is Amanda! Then I convince her to plan our trip to the UK to coincide with AT4 ... and ames is good to go! LOL - I know, not asking for much there, eh? Yeah ... but a girl can dream!

Getting her hooked on Amanda, easy. Trip to UK in (maybe) November? Might be a bit harder.

[samcarterrules]

Well as you know Samandans have a certain reputation

Nor do mine and I get lots of gentle teasing about it, particularly from my sister and her boyfriend. I know a few others who are into sci fi but they have their preferences like Star Wars and Angel, not Stargate.

I don't buy much merchandise but I do have a thing for the set used costumes and love the Gabit events for the fact that Legends are there. I usually end up buying a piece at each event and my mum says to me "you spent how much on a tee shirt?!" And I reply that it's not like I go out boozing my moeny away each week. And then I point to my older sister and say "yeah well......she's just spend £3500 on a horse and another £3000 on a horse box so go and moan at her"!

Parents!

I'm exactly the same mousie my family think I'm nuts for liking Amanda the way I do, their words are "She's only an actress how important and inspiring can she be to you?" *shakes head sadly* they have no idea, and I won't tell you what they say about Stargate, Sanctuary, being part of fandom and going to Cons LOL.




Julia(samcarterrules)

[JuliaR]

To Chelle and Jenni,

On a strictly personal level and not as a G4, a few words for you in what you think is your dilemmma.

Sometimes it's hard to make the decision to do something strictly for yourself. It feels selfish (even though it isn't) to want to enjoy something you really really want to do - for yourself, and yourself alone - and it's harder if your partner doesn't want to join you. HOWEVER. In any relationship and family life it's the richness that you bring to it from being individuals and having individual interests as well as joint interests. We come to a family, to a partnership as separate entities and join together to form a unit. The parts of the unit are still unique though. And it is the uniqueness of the individual parts which enhances the sum of the whole. In other words, stay as unique as you are - enjoy different things as individuals - and enjoy other things as partners. There doesn't have to be an "either/or" scenario.

Being a mum makes the decision to do something for yourself even harder. I know. I've been there. But take my advice (and experience) - do it. It can only bring good in the end. Your family will benefit from the experiences you will tell them about. You will feel stronger as a person because you've paid attention to the "me". If you don't follow your dreams then you end up resenting the fact that you haven't, and resentment isn't pretty.

So take it from a mother, a wife, and a woman who has stood where you stood on several, several occasions and swallowed hard and took the plunge (and never ever once regretted it) - if it's the trip you want then save hard for the trip, take the trip, and fulfil what you are dreaming about.

The life we have isn't a rehearsal. We have to grab it and live it to it's full potential.

Julia
G4

[Tittamiire]

Part of me wants to go alone (only because I'd like to just hang with my friends, for once)...but the other part of me is worried I will be alone more than with friends. And that part sucks.

I'm another lone con goer who has had a blast both times...it is a lot of fun walking up to random people in the confidence that there is at least one topic you can both talk for hours on.

Funny story from AT3. Gabit was selling badges with various "Sam sayings" on them. Proceeds to the hearing dogs. The morning after the auction I was looking through the basket and decided to buy one that said "What's a girl to do?" Starflight happened by right at that moment and said "You're going to keep your purchase this time, right? You should keep something for yourself!" Whenever I saw her thereafter she kept asking if I still had my badge! (Still do by the way)

Lol...I hope that badge attends more cons

I have my "trust me it's a maths thing" on my back pack at the moment....just because I have often said "trust me, it's the right answer" in reference to maths things.

I have NO idea what you're referring too...*twitches*




And HA...Ames had five million of those badges.

and when she thought she'd lost them it was very very scary...

How much time you spend alone is wholly up to you. I'm an introvert, so I need time alone to recharge, but I was having so much fun at AT3, I think a shower in the morning sufficed.



My family doesn't get it at all. I've been working on them for years, though, and I got a kick out of my mom's telling my new sister-in-law about my then upcoming trip. When I was worried about money and the exchange rate, she told me in no uncertain terms that I had to go.

My parents and my sibs think it's weird, but they know how good fandom is for me.

I know the feeling about needing alone time. There were times at AT3 where I just retreated to my room and lay down and very still and quiet for half an hour and then got up and got back into it lol...but I needed that alone time.

My family are wonderful, they don't get it, but they accept it and to be honest a lot of the time they are genuinely happy to see I am happy regardless of the cause. They're a good bunch

Well, only about 26 or so, but close enough
The girls said they could hear me coming ... LOL!
Lemme tell ya though - my lanyard sure was heavy by the end of the weekend!
<snip>
...and in other news: my mother is now officially hooked on Stargate. Next step, get her hooked on the awesomeness that is Amanda! Then I convince her to plan our trip to the UK to coincide with AT4 ... and ames is good to go! LOL - I know, not asking for much there, eh? Yeah ... but a girl can dream!

the lanyard served a similar purpose to when you put a bell around a cats neck and yes...convince your mum! Mother and daughter trips are fun...AT events are fun...combine the two wheee

lol...mind you at the moment I am trying to persuade my Mum that she wants to go to Glasgow to play camogie (womens version of hurling...which is a strange sport that is a bit like field hockey with the ball in the air all the time).

[SWMBOTGSG]

I'm exactly the same mousie my family think I'm nuts for liking Amanda the way I do, their words are "She's only an actress how important and inspiring can she be to you?" *shakes head sadly* they have no idea, and I won't tell you what they say about Stargate, Sanctuary, being part of fandom and going to Cons LOL.

Julia(samcarterrules)

I am so with you on this one. (Rant in spoilers so folk can avoid.)

Spoiler:

My sister has never been able to come to terms with fandom of any kind. Our mother was a Mario Lanza fan who helped to run his fan club. Remember, this was in the days before the internet, but she had pen-pals all over the world. She had rhumatoid arthritis and was housebound most of the time. That club was her escape, and kept her 'alive'. She was very aware that her obsession would not be appreciated by her family, and kept her activities with it to the day time, and ran her house as best she could given her disabilities. I personally never suffered through this, and was pleased that she had this diversion to help her through the years of pain she bore. My sister, who is 8 years my senior, never complained to me, but I don't know if she felt in any way deprived.

She is learning to live with my obsession with Stargate and RDA. I know she doesn't like the time taken up with GABIT, and I am aware that she does resent it. I am getting very strong vibes from her about my forthcoming sojourn to Canada in August. Three weeks on the other side of the Atlantic is going to be quite a trial for her. I try not to feel guilty, but it's hard. I have my life to live. She still has her husband - mine was lost to me four years ago. Gatecon is going to be hard. He loved going to Vancouver and joining in the con. He would have loved being involved in GABIT.

My point, in this lengthy rant, is that some folks have a very narrow view of what it is to really get involved in something - anything. My sister has never (in her adult life) been 'into' anything (although as a teenager she would follow Doris Day's fashions and hairstyles very closely, being a natural platinum blonde). Her life has revolved around work and her husband (they have no kids - their choice). Holidays were always spent in very few venues in the UK. In retirement, she spends a lot of time in her garden and on her hobbies of photography and painting. I, and my kids, are all she has as a family, and she has very few friends. The internet terrifies her and she won't have anything to do with it. (Our Mum would have LOVED it!) She is tied to her way of life and I am 'out there' giving it all I can and living it all I can, and trying very hard not to feel guilty about it. (And succeeding to a degree!)

Mumsey - not bovvered what others think!