GABIT attendees thread

[dipsofjazz]

(Jumps onto soap-box)

Spoiler:

We call them 'dummies'. I get incensed when I see babies with plugs in their mouths. These days they cover most of the bottom of their dear little faces. So ugly!!

My two never saw one of those, and they both did fine without. I was a stay at home Mum, and when they wanted attention, they got it. As most of you know them both, I hope you'll agree they turned out just fine!

(Puts soap-box away again.)

Mumsey

Hmmmm..........I'm not so sure about Becky. *runs away quickly*

[Jumble]

My neice had one, for a while, while she was still nursing. But she hasn't used one in years. She does suck on her sippy cup at times, but she is going through a rather insecure phase at the moment. (just started pre-school)

they serve their place and were originally meant to be a 'no, you can't have your bottle yet' or 'i don't have a bottle ready yet' substitute, not a means for peace and quiet for years

I've always found dummies to be more manageable than thumbs. You can keep a dummy sterilized and take it away before the child goes to school. Can't do that with a thumb

[Tittamiire]

I sucked my thumb as a child....but generally only when I was sleepy or upset, or at night. Generally I was too busy otherwise to be sucking my thumb. There were better things to do with my hands. I'm kinda okay with dummies if it is just a bedtime/nap time comfort, but if they're toddling around with the darned thing in their mouth trying to talk around it then it's not doing any good. I didn't have one, nor did any of my brothers and none of them sucked their thumbs, just me.

That's why my niece is lagging behind. She's blind, so she can't see how we make the sounds. But she's getting there.

I've got a friend whose deaf and could see the shapes and feel the sound of different noises, but not hear them. Her first language is ASL, but she wasn't that far behind in speaking either once she got going.

[Chelle DB]

One of the worst detriments to speech is parents who use the pacifier (binky) from an early age to 'quiet' or 'pacify' their children. They unfortunately get used to it, almost addicted to the rubber plugs and refuse to give them up. I've known kids who sucked on the things all the way up to 5 yrs of age and these children spoke little, and when they did, it was one or two words at a time combined with quite a bit of pointing/gestures to indicate their wants.
Used sparingly, in only in the first few months, I don't find a problem with pacifiers. It's the parents who abuse it's use in their children's first few years who unknowingly are harming them and their natural aptitude to learn speech.

I've always found dummies to be more manageable than thumbs. You can keep a dummy sterilized and take it away before the child goes to school. Can't do that with a thumb

Oooh...

Spoiler:

please don't judge me now...my kids both had dummies as babies. They only ever used them when it was sleep time though...it wasn't something they had in their mouths all the time. I'm not a bad mother.
I found that with the dummy, it was easier to take it out of the equation than a thumb...we had the dummy fairy take it once the kids reached a certain age. The dummy never interfered with my kids speech development or the development of their mouths and neither did they become addicted to it. And as Jumble said, they are so much easier to keep clean than a thumb or a teddy that they suck on...and we've been there too. And even as a stay at home mum who gave my kids all the attention they demanded...and demand they did/do well...well the dummy helped.
There are a lot of old wives tales about the use of dummies and thumb sucking. It's almost really sad that as parents we're damned if we do and we're damned if we don't. I find even now with teenagers, the decisions I make don't always agree with everyone...I can't win either way. But please don't assume that if a parent gives their child a dummy or bottle feeds or chooses disposable over cloth nappies then their bad parents. And just to add to the infraction list...I did feed my kids baby food from a jar...on the odd occasion...I used to make batches of baby meals up and freeze them. I also breast and bottle fed my babies, mostly used disposable nappies...more so with Tom than Niki...used a dummy, as already listed, used a baby walker, gave them Gripe Water when they had bad wind, let them sleep on their tummy's and even fed them solids at an earlier than recommended age...under advisement from the doctor though. Kinda makes me look like the mother from hell doesn't it? it's so easy to judge parents, but life isn't always black and white.

So...any news yet of a date for AT5??

[Tittamiire]

Oooh...

Spoiler:

please don't judge me now...my kids both had dummies as babies. They only ever used them when it was sleep time though...it wasn't something they had in their mouths all the time. I'm not a bad mother.
I found that with the dummy, it was easier to take it out of the equation than a thumb...we had the dummy fairy take it once the kids reached a certain age. The dummy never interfered with my kids speech development or the development of their mouths and neither did they become addicted to it. And as Jumble said, they are so much easier to keep clean than a thumb or a teddy that they suck on...and we've been there too. And even as a stay at home mum who gave my kids all the attention they demanded...and demand they did/do well...well the dummy helped.
There are a lot of old wives tales about the use of dummies and thumb sucking. It's almost really sad that as parents we're damned if we do and we're damned if we don't. I find even now with teenagers, the decisions I make don't always agree with everyone...I can't win either way. But please don't assume that if a parent gives their child a dummy or bottle feeds or chooses disposable over cloth nappies then their bad parents. And just to add to the infraction list...I did feed my kids baby food from a jar...on the odd occasion...I used to make batches of baby meals up and freeze them. I also breast and bottle fed my babies, mostly used disposable nappies...more so with Tom than Niki...used a dummy, as already listed, used a baby walker, gave them Gripe Water when they had bad wind, let them sleep on their tummy's and even fed them solids at an earlier than recommended age...under advisement from the doctor though. Kinda makes me look like the mother from hell doesn't it? it's so easy to judge parents, but life isn't always black and white.

So...any news yet of a date for AT5??

Chelle, you're not a bad parent, as you've said there are lots of different options and messages and so much of parenting is personal opinion.

My parents used to give me a whole apple to eat, well well before I had teeth. It was as much for their own entertainment as mine, a apparently I enjoyed the challenge and it'd keep me quiet for hours!

[Jumble]

Oooh...

Spoiler:

please don't judge me now...my kids both had dummies as babies. They only ever used them when it was sleep time though...it wasn't something they had in their mouths all the time. I'm not a bad mother.
I found that with the dummy, it was easier to take it out of the equation than a thumb...we had the dummy fairy take it once the kids reached a certain age. The dummy never interfered with my kids speech development or the development of their mouths and neither did they become addicted to it. And as Jumble said, they are so much easier to keep clean than a thumb or a teddy that they suck on...and we've been there too. And even as a stay at home mum who gave my kids all the attention they demanded...and demand they did/do well...well the dummy helped.
There are a lot of old wives tales about the use of dummies and thumb sucking. It's almost really sad that as parents we're damned if we do and we're damned if we don't. I find even now with teenagers, the decisions I make don't always agree with everyone...I can't win either way. But please don't assume that if a parent gives their child a dummy or bottle feeds or chooses disposable over cloth nappies then their bad parents. And just to add to the infraction list...I did feed my kids baby food from a jar...on the odd occasion...I used to make batches of baby meals up and freeze them. I also breast and bottle fed my babies, mostly used disposable nappies...more so with Tom than Niki...used a dummy, as already listed, used a baby walker, gave them Gripe Water when they had bad wind, let them sleep on their tummy's and even fed them solids at an earlier than recommended age...under advisement from the doctor though. Kinda makes me look like the mother from hell doesn't it? it's so easy to judge parents,

but life isn't always black and white.
So...any news yet of a date for AT5??

Exactly And we all have different childhoods and lives from which we are expected to glean our 'training' for parenthood, so we all do it differently. In the end, as long as we love them enough we usually do ok

[Kliggins]

(Jumps onto soap-box)

Spoiler:

We call them 'dummies'. I get incensed when I see babies with plugs in their mouths. These days they cover most of the bottom of their dear little faces. So ugly!!

My two never saw one of those, and they both did fine without. I was a stay at home Mum, and when they wanted attention, they got it. As most of you know them both, I hope you'll agree they turned out just fine!

(Puts soap-box away again.)

Mumsey

Well.................. maybe *scurries away after Bev*

[Celandine]

Oooh...

Spoiler:

please don't judge me now...my kids both had dummies as babies. They only ever used them when it was sleep time though...it wasn't something they had in their mouths all the time. I'm not a bad mother.
I found that with the dummy, it was easier to take it out of the equation than a thumb...we had the dummy fairy take it once the kids reached a certain age. The dummy never interfered with my kids speech development or the development of their mouths and neither did they become addicted to it. And as Jumble said, they are so much easier to keep clean than a thumb or a teddy that they suck on...and we've been there too. And even as a stay at home mum who gave my kids all the attention they demanded...and demand they did/do well...well the dummy helped.
There are a lot of old wives tales about the use of dummies and thumb sucking. It's almost really sad that as parents we're damned if we do and we're damned if we don't. I find even now with teenagers, the decisions I make don't always agree with everyone...I can't win either way. But please don't assume that if a parent gives their child a dummy or bottle feeds or chooses disposable over cloth nappies then their bad parents. And just to add to the infraction list...I did feed my kids baby food from a jar...on the odd occasion...I used to make batches of baby meals up and freeze them. I also breast and bottle fed my babies, mostly used disposable nappies...more so with Tom than Niki...used a dummy, as already listed, used a baby walker, gave them Gripe Water when they had bad wind, let them sleep on their tummy's and even fed them solids at an earlier than recommended age...under advisement from the doctor though. Kinda makes me look like the mother from hell doesn't it? it's so easy to judge parents, but life isn't always black and white.

So...any news yet of a date for AT5??

Chelle, nobody is here to sit in judgment of you nor are we here to throw rocks. You might remember how that story ended up.

You said yourself in an earlier post to use your 'gut instinct' and I think your 100% correct. What you do as a parent ultimately is your decision. The point of my post was how parents abuse the use of pacifiers where the child is seen throughout the whole day with the blasted thing in their mouth, not just nap or sleepy time. This is where their speech development became harmed. You didn't do that so don't feel badly for anyone stating what your doing might be wrong. I know you have some awesome kids as your pride for them shows in all the things you say about them so I'm more than apt to believe you than think otherwise.

*hugs for any earlier hurt feelings*

[Tittamiire]

Exactly And we all have different childhoods and lives from which we are expected to glean our 'training' for parenthood, so we all do it differently. In the end, as long as we love them enough we usually do ok

Love is the starting point, but parents do need the knowledge and skills too. I work around a lot of parents who truly and genuinely love their children, but who can't give them the care they need. The range of 'good enough' parenting is huge....but if someone didn't have good parenting themselves, no matter how much they love their child they've got to learn a lot of stuff that someone who had good parenting doesn't.

[Chelle DB]

Spoiler:

Chelle, nobody is here to sit in judgment of you nor are we here to throw rocks. You might remember how that story ended up.
You said yourself in an earlier post to use your 'gut instinct' and I think your 100% correct. What you do as a parent ultimately is your decision. The point of my post was how parents abuse the use of pacifiers where the child is seen throughout the whole day with the blasted thing in their mouth, not just nap or sleepy time. This is where their speech development became harmed. You didn't do that so don't feel badly for anyone stating what your doing might be wrong. I know you have some awesome kids as your pride for them shows in all the things you say about them so I'm more than apt to believe you than think otherwise.

*hugs for any earlier hurt feelings*

Spoiler:

Awww...right back at ya Cel. Not so much hurt feelings as much as I still doubt myself...and that's my own issues I have to learn to deal with. I think it helped to put out there my own experiences with the dummy...so much so that I even sat down with hubby after tea tonight and we chatted about it...I guess the need for reassurance that I did ok as a mum kicks in when I hear differences of opinion...especially when they're strongly voiced. I just need to get over my own insecurities as a parent...and that's not easy.

[Skydiver]

there's no such thing as an absolute rule to raise a kid. Some eat food earlier than others. some only thrive once they get on formula, some walk when they're 9mos, others not until they're 18 mos

every kid is different.

no one should feel bad for anything they've done. y'all got good kids so i think you did your job right

[Skydiver]

sooooooooo

about those cons

I've heard a rumor that there'll be an abnormal's ball at the SE con...what costumes are folks gonna wear?

[EH-T]

My parents used to give me a whole apple to eat, well well before I had teeth. It was as much for their own entertainment as mine, a apparently I enjoyed the challenge and it'd keep me quiet for hours!

I'll have to remember that for the next con.

sooooooooo

about those cons

I've heard a rumor that there'll be an abnormal's ball at the SE con...what costumes are folks gonna wear?

Is that what this thread is about?

I bet I know what Titta will be wearing.

[Skydiver]

i'm almost afraid to ask

[EH-T]

i'm almost afraid to ask

You should be, she was pretty scary!