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Joseph Mallozzi's Blog! (SPOILERS For All SG Shows and Dark Matter)

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    http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...week-reminder/

    February 25, 2012

    Photos: Ashleigh, Condorman


    Why, it’s Ashleigh – my former assistant/occasional vegetarian dinner companion/arch-nemesis. Notice something different about her? That’s right. She’s married!

    After trying to duck me for the past three months, my persistence (and phone calls at all hours of the night) finally paid off and she agreed to meet me for lunch at a neutral location: Chez Meme, a place we used to order from all the time back when we were working on Stargate.

    We both went with our old favorite, the pear, brie, and walnut on baguette. Boy, that took me back. I even ate some of her fries. It was just like old times! Anyway, between the sandwiches and the desserts (a creme brûlée for her and a chocolate marquise for me) we covered the recent exciting developments in our lives (my wonderful year in Toronto, her summer as a Qingyi with the Peking Opera). We also talked Stargate and she mentioned how much she missed Carl. Carl! She sounds like Akemi who spent all of three months with the guy last year and now speaks of Carl with a fondness usually reserved for family members and beloved pets. I mean, seriously. WTF?

    After lunch, I walked her back to her car (despite three successive attempts to give me the slip) and we discussed getting together on a regular basis. She suggested I wait for her call. I countered with two dinners and one lunch a week. We settled on I would wait for her call.

    Came across this article the other day: Tech is tarnishing Tinseltown. It’s an interesting read but with little in the way of surprises, especially for those of us who, for years, have been discussing the changing face of ratings and profit specifically with regard to Stargate: Universe and the Stargate franchise. The author talks about Hollywood’s recent hard times, the result of plummeting DVD sales and the not-so-coincidental rise of internet streaming services. And, as much as many in the industry don’t want to admit it, it aint gonna get any brighter. DVD will NOT be making a comeback and attempts to stem online piracy, even if successful, will not usher a return to the glory days. As the article points out: “Not one of the media sectors restructured by the Internet or digital technology has managed to rebuild itself to its previous size. Not recorded music, radio, or newspapers. More and more it looks like it’s Hollywood’s turn to get a haircut.” The reality is that, rather than force the technology to fit the long-standing paradigm, we need to throw the old paradigm out the window and rebuild by embracing these new technological developments; find a way to exploit and maximize rather than reshape. The bottom line is consumers value convenience. They want to watch what they want when they want and – increasingly – how they want. And whoever figures out the best way to deliver that stands to make a lot of money.

    A reminder to all you masochists members of our Supermovie of the Week Club (in which we review and discuss a different superhero-themed film each week!) that our guest reviewer, and Supermovie of the Week Club host Cookie Monster, will be dropping by on Monday to give us his review of this week’s pick: Condorman. I know, I know. It’s been a pretty rough start given that we’re screening these movies in chronological order but just think – we’ll watch suspect movies like Condorman and Superman III now so that we can enjoy brilliant, more contemporary entries like Daredevil and Elektra later. So track down a copy of Condorman and take part in Monday’s discussion. After all, you wouldn’t want to miss -
    sigpic
    The Sam Carter/Amanda Tapping Thunk thread The Sam/RepliCarter Ship Thread

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      http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...er-sister-win/

      February 26, 2012

      Photos: Akemi, sausages, Oyster po'boy, Cookie monster fingernails


      You’ll be pleased or indifferent to hear that I finally completed a first draft of my horror script yesterday and sent off versions to Ivon, my writing partner Paul and, of course, my Toronto nemesis Tara who would make either a fantastic lunatic or an equally great hapless victim when it comes time to shoot the movie. I, of course, feel a terrific sense of accomplishment – that will inevitably fade over the next few days to be replaced by feelings of regret, uncertainty, and a general desire to switch gears and do something completely different like go to chef school or become a professional Warhammer player. More than likely, however, I’ll just end up writing something else – probably that damn pilot script I’ve been meaning to finish. Meanwhile, the more I research that historical mini-series, the more I think it will just be too damn expensive to produce and I should instead consider writing that feature about the crime-solving monkeys.

      Today, Ivon, Patrick, Lawren and I reconvened to continue our Game of Thrones marathon.

      I was hoping we could reconvene sometime this week to continue watching but Lawren ruined everything by getting a job.

      So, everybody finished watching Condorman? I’m sure Cookie Monster, our Supermovie of the Week guest reviewer, will have plenty to say on the subject. Wonder if he enjoyed it more than Superman II?

      Speaking of Cookie Monster, check these out -

      Tara is apparently the nail art Queen of Toronto and given to posting pics of her latest creations over on her blog. The other day, I asked her if she took requests. What kind of requests? I suggested cartoon characters. She went one better.

      In addition to posting pics of her nails, she also posts the occasional amusing story – like this one, for instance, detailing an awkward on-set experience with John McLean himelf, Bruce Willis: This is My Bruce Willis Story

      My front and semi-regular blog reader, Kellie Rice, is trying to win her sister tickets to The Hunger Games premiere (which, I assume, is sort of like the Olympics for dieters). Anyway, Kellie’s video is a top 5 finalist and she needs YOUR support. Head on over to https://www.facebook.com/badassdigest?sk=wall and “like” the Badass: Katniss Everdeen vid. The gals, I’m sure, will be eternally grateful.
      sigpic
      The Sam Carter/Amanda Tapping Thunk thread The Sam/RepliCarter Ship Thread

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        http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...ews-condorman/

        February 27, 2012

        Photos: Condorman


        After terruble Superman films, Condorman a nice change of pace. Not so much terruble as trooly horruble. It be movie made for kidz – at a time when kidz not know any better (ie. dat kidz movies could aktually be good). Also, monster would like to file formal complaint becuz dis not superhero movie. Again! It more like Slovakian James Bond film.

        Our hero, Woody, be comic book writer (hate him alreddy!) who invent superhero: Condorman. Like most writerz, he like to dress up and akt like charakter from his own book. Just like George R. R. Martin when he dekapitate all dose homeless men after write Game of Drones. Monster not sure if Woody crazy, stupid, or both, but he know one ting for sure – he damn annoying! Michael Crawford play part of Woody wit all restrained finesse of mouseketeer mainlining Red Bull. He like stage aktor hamming it up for de cheap seats! Should mebbe consider career in theater.

        So, when we first meet Woody, he decide to jump off Eiffel Tower in Condorman suit and fly. But wardrobe malfunktion make him crash into Seine (which, by de way, mean “boob” in French. True. Me look it up!). Lucky for him he slowed down by wires holding him up.

        Woody be friends with CIA agent who ask him to make sekret dokument exchange wit Russian spy. Huh? Becuz Russia demand exchange to be made using civilians. HUH? And CIA have to use civilian instead of spy pretending to be civilian becuz…HUH??!!!

        Woody meet up wit sexy Russian spy, Natalia. Vavavavoom! Monster not kick her out of bed for eating chocolate chippee cookies. Unless she not share wit monster in which case he kick her out. Den invite her back when he finished. Anyway, Woody meet up wit sexy Russian, Natalia. He introduce himself = codename Condorman. Bad guyz show up. He beats dem up…somehow. He good, lucky or both? Me not sure, but monster know one ting: he still damn annoying!

        Woody go back to life as loozer. Den get call from CIA. Natalia want to defekt. But only will defekt wit help of Condorman. Monster know what dat like. Once, after have Grand Slam breakfast at Dennys, monster not defekt for tree day! Have to call Elmo to help. He have to use box of Qtips and entire bottle of linseed oil!

        For some reazon, bad guyz don’t want her to defekt. Dey try to stop Woody!

        Shootoout! Car chase – which, monster have to admit, not dat bad. Stuntz! Crashes! Monster notice dis “kid-friendly” film shot at a time when a-okay to kill off bad guyz. Dey crash, get blown up, fall off cliff – and iz all good fun!

        Condorman able to escape becuz his old truck really disguized condorman car wit floaty wings. How he get all dese gadjets? Why, CIA gave to him! American government waste money to build speshul yellow condor cars and condor sootz for civilian fake spies! Dats why ekonomy in da toilet! Dats why Cookie’s 401k almost worthless and me have to sign up to be tester for ass fur exfoliator at research lab! Don’t get monster started!

        Dey get away to Italy. Crash wedding!

        Den check into hotel. English-speaking “Italian” kids rekognize Natalia as inspirashun for comik book charakter Laser Lady! Sexy Russian spy tink Woody cool. I repeat: sexy girl tink guy who write comic book cool! Okay, monster accept fakt dat CIA send civilian wit no training on important misshun. Cookie accept fakt dat CIA pay for all gadjets for misshun. But dis a bit of a stretch, no?

        Bad guyz kidnap Natalia. Woody and his CIA friend disguize demself as sheiks and crash party.

        CIA buddy set off exploziuns. How he possibly can hide bombs under his sheik suit? Never mind dat. Woody have a little surprize for Natalia hiding under HIS robe...

        Dat’s right! Condorman soot. Natalia jump on and he giver her ride of her life.

        Dey get away. CIA buddy forgets to put car brake on and car roll into lake. For some reazon. Boat chase! Lasers! More bad guyz crash, burn, blow up!

        Woody save Natalia. Dey go back to Amerika. Go to Dodgers game. CIA offer Condorman new assinement! Leave door open for crummy sekwel.

        Verdikt: So far, udder moviez monster have reviewed for supermovie of de week club aim high and fail mizerably. Condorman aim very low and fail even miserablier! Action sekwences and Barbara Carrera very watchable, but rest of movie like watching drunk high school understudy produktion of Ian Fleming’s lesser known works. Condorman is for de birdz (me was also tinking about going wit equally witty: “Condorman never takes off”, “Condorman crashes” or “Condorman takes giant dump on dis viewer’s head”).

        Also, NOT A SUPERHERO MOVIE!

        Rating: 1 chocolate chippee cookie.
        sigpic
        The Sam Carter/Amanda Tapping Thunk thread The Sam/RepliCarter Ship Thread

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          http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...-such-mailbag/

          February 28, 2012

          Video: Jelly

          Photo: Jelly


          Wow. Two years after the stem cell transplant, my pug Jelly is an all new pug. This was the same dog that, at one point, could barely stand...

          Heard back from my writing partner, Paul, this morning. He just read the first draft of the horror script and is very enthusiastic about it. He made a few excellent points, came up with some excellent suggestions, and informed me he wanted to re-read the script a couple of times and give it further thought. Tomorrow, I meet former Stargate Special Features Producer Ivon Bartok to talk about the script and start envisioning the trailer he’s going to shoot for it. The script is also in the hands of my Toronto nemesis, Tara Yelland. I sent her a copy a couple of days ago and she turned around some notes in record time, but complained about the fact that the script was unfinished. Turned out I had sent her an early version that was about 50 pages light! I mean, seriously. How can she start studying her lines without a proper script? Anyway, I sent the proper draft her way and am looking forward to reading her accolades/criticisms/innumerable character requests.

          Well, this is interesting. Just heard from my agent in L.A. who called with some intriguing developments on the Dark Matter front. Looks like we’ve got a big conference call later this week to discuss. Will, of course, keep you all posted.

          I needn’t remind you all the the next selection in our continuing Supermovie of the Week Club will be Superman III which we’ll be discussing Monday, February 5th when guest reviewer Cookie Monster weighs in with his review.


          Mailbag:

          poundpuppy(Erika) writes: “Hi Joe I know it has been awhile but I have a question for you, you said you saw Jack & Sam together in your AU what about Daniel & Vala are they together in your AU or your mind?”

          Answer: Hey, Erika. Just this morning I was thinking about some of the former regulars I hadn’t seen in a while, including you. How goes? To answer your question – in my mind, Jack and Sam got together not long after the events of Threads and Daniel and Vala not long after the SG-1 series finale. But, of course, given that we never saw any of this play out onscreen, my opinion is just that – an opinion, no more or less valid than that of any other viewer.

          gforce writes: “One of things that’s great about Joe’s blog, in this case the Supermovie club, is that I find it encourages me to try things like these movies that I never would have normally.”

          Answer: Given the quality of the movies we’ve screened s far, that’s not necessarily a good thing.

          howdy doo writes: “Are you retired from tv writing buddy?”

          Answer: Nope, not retiring – just doing what I should have done last year, something I had always told myself I would do once Stargate ended: taking the year off to focus on my own projects (features, pilot scripts, pitches for an original series or two) and do a little traveling. In addition to going back to Japan, I ‘m also considering trips to Hong Kong, Vegas, San Francsico, Paris, and Berlin (to visit my friends Alexander and Sarah). One of the many great things about those eleven years on Stargate is the freedom it’s given me to be able to take the time off, make my own schedule, and, for the first time in twelve years, not worry about deadlines or what’s coming up next.

          Aussuu writes: “Quick question about the inspiration for the writing of Stargate, particularly the story line of the ancients. I was invited to go see a pre-screening of John Cater this last weekend and couldn’t help but see the correlation between the ability to travel between worlds and a superior race that over saw everything. Having not read the books by Edger R Burroughs I can’t say for certain, So my question is was there any inspiration taken from Burroughs writing in the creation and continued writings of Stargate?”

          Answer: This one’s a question for Robert Cooper since he was the one who created and developed the whole Ancient backstory. I doubt, however, that he was influenced by Burroughs though.

          Lisa R writes: “And Joe, you don’t know what The Hunger Games is?”

          Answer: Sure. Isn’t it Battle Royale with Western actors?

          Matt writes: “I started reading Dark Matter and i picked up the first two issue and i was wondering during the creation of the characters for Dark Matter, did you and Paul ever wonder if your work on stargate was going to affect how you developed the characters? such as one character would end up as a Jack O’Neill type character. one character end up as the Carter type? the daniel type? teal’c type?”

          Answer: As much as I loved the characters that made up team SG-1, there was never any danger of their personalities bleeding into the characters I’d created for Dark Matter. I think that both groups of characters are distinct enough, something that will hopefully become obvious as the personalities of the DM crew develop.

          Lewis writes: “If the X-Men’s Nightcrawler were to walk through an open Stargate would he be able to “transport” his molecules outside of the wormhole while still in the wormhole before reaching the Stargate at the other end? And if he were able to do so, where would he end up? (a random point outer space between the 2 Stargates? the nearest planet? back at the 1st gate/point of origin?)”

          Answer: Hmmm. Interesting question – although I’m not sure I understand the question. Given what I know about Nightcrawler’s teleporting ability, he would be a simple physical form (no different from, say, a Cyclops or aWolverine) in order to walk into the event horizon – at which point we would be demolecularized, transported to the receiving gate, and remolecularized on the other end, back to his physical form. He wouldn’t be able to teleport while in his demolecularized state, much less think. On the other hand, I’m not sure what would happen if he was to teleport inside the event horizon – and doubt that would even be possible. Again, I’m not sure how his teleportation abilities work, but I would think he would need some knowledge (or mental picture) of wherever he intended to teleport. If, for the sake of argument, he was able to teleport himself beyond the event horizon (unlikely, but let’s say), I would imagine he would be instantly demolecularized within the mouth of the wormhole, transported, then remolecularized on the other side like anyone else. The key here is that in order to be transported, he would need to physically reappear when he teleports himself beyond the event horizon. In Kurt’s case, he teleports traveling not by dispersing his molecular structure and crossing to a certain target area but disappearing and reappearing from one location to the next instantaneously. Or at least that’s the way I believe it works.

          Sparced writes: “Personally I think Blu-rays killed the entire home video market.”

          Answer: That’s what did it for me. I used to purchase 4-5 dvd’s a week – then, when Blu-ray came out and made my dvd collection obsolete, I just said “Screw it!” and looked to the web for all my entertainment needs.

          roger reynolds, Dallas Texas writes: “Joe, I wanted to write and say thank you (!) for what you created in Stargate Universe – i just watched again, the first three episodes – “Air” and am blown away by the musical scoring, the performances of the ensemble of talented actors and the expression of the storyline. The work stands repeated viewing and still impresses.”

          Answer: Thanks, Roger. A lot of very talented people worked very hard to produce Stargate: Universe and I’m very proud to have been a part of it. Hopefully, I’ll have the opportunity to work with most of them again in the near future.
          sigpic
          The Sam Carter/Amanda Tapping Thunk thread The Sam/RepliCarter Ship Thread

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            http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...nary-creation/

            February 29, 2012

            Photos: Dark Matter, Alexander M. Ruemelin, baking


            The third issue of my comic book, Dark Matter, hits the shelves March 12th. It’s a series with action, adventure, suspense, mystery, humor, twists, turns, surprises…but you already know this because you picked up issues #1 and #2 and are now anxiously awaiting the third installment of the four part opening story arc. You’re no doubt wondering how our heroes will respond to last issue’s shocking revelation. Well, if you’re REALLY curious, I can offer you a sneak peek of what you can look forward to in issue #3 – or, more to the point, several sneak peeks. Over the next six days, I’ll be giving you a glimpse of what lies ahead for our intrepid crew. But, just in case you’ve yet to get around to reading issue #2 (tsk tsk), I’ve uploaded the sneak peek to the bottom of this post. Scroll away!

            My editor at Dark Horse, Patrick Thorpe, has been keeping busy. He’s overseeing the return of the avenging spirit, Ghost, in a three-part story that will premiere in the June issue of Dark Horse Presents (#13): http://www.comicbookresources.com/?p...ticle&id=37265. Meanwhile, he continues his editing duties on a comic book I really should be checking out: http://battlepug.com/.

            The conference call we’d set up on the heels of the intriguing news I received yesterday (re: Dark Matter) has been pushed to Friday afternoon. Welcome to Hollywood. It’s still quite early in the game but, if this piece falls into place, it’ll be a enormous coup for the project.

            Speaking of projects, I got together with Ivon Bartok today to talk about the trailer for our horror movie. We discussed the narrative structure its (we want to tell the story in under two minutes) and its production demands and costs (we want to tell the story in under two minutes without having it cost us a lot of money). I think we have a pretty solid plan of attack. Over the next few days, I’ll be working on fine-tuning the mini script. Ivon, meanwhile, sent me some terrific samples of the type of visuals we could use for the trailer. Creepy and incredibly effective.

            When, in a recent email, Alexander casually mentioned he’d bought a suit, I, naturally, refused to believe him. After all, this was a guy who, I’ve long suspected, was actually born in jeans and a t-shirt. Him in a suit? No way. I asked for proof. So he sent me the above pic. Hunh. He DID buy a suit. But why? My guess is parole board hearing.

            Akemi was busy in the kitchen yesterday trying out a new recipe...

            One of the interesting things I just learned about the macaron-making process is that you should allow the macarons to rest for 24 hours before serving. I sampled them freshly made and, while tasty, they were far too chewy. The shells lacked that diaphanous crispness characteristic of a truly great macaron (They, in fact, possessed the exact textural failings of the macarons Thierry Busset sells at his shop on Alberni). The next day, however, they were perfect – crisp, airy and delicious.

            Today’s entry is dedicated to Kathode. Congrats on the engagement!

            And, oh yeah, that first sneak peek of Dark Matter #2 I promised you...

            You can check out more of the Dark Matter #3 preview, in addition to sneak peeks at other comic book titles, here: http://www.comicbookresources.com/
            sigpic
            The Sam Carter/Amanda Tapping Thunk thread The Sam/RepliCarter Ship Thread

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              http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...eview-mailbag/

              March 1, 2012

              Photos: Stargate SG-1 and Stargate Atlantis behind the scenes pics, Dark Matter


              Today, Ivon was out and about, scouting locations for our horror trailer. Kudos to him for coming up with some fantastic, diabolically creepy-looking places – the type of places you would never frequent at night, least of all to shoot something. While Ivon was on the road, I was on my laptop, working on the script for the 2 minute trailer. It’s pretty close. Rhythmically, it goes something like this:

              - – - …….!-!-!….?….?……!!!

              So, whaddya think? There are two great scenes I could use to cap the trailer and I’m not sure which one to go with. Both are suspenseful with great pay-offs but the first leaves a lot to the imagination while the second is quite visceral (and might require me to call on the services of a couple of my old Stargate cohorts). I’m leaning toward the former only because the expenses for this little project are coming out of pocket and the budget is a little tighter than what I grew accustomed to working with on Stargate.

              Hey, speaking of Stargate, I was clearing out the files on my old Sony camcorders and came across a bunch of old pics...

              I’ve got thousands of them, mostly unsorted, that I should really go through at some point.

              Hey, blog regular, Deni, is raising money for a worthy cause: 100 Doghouses for 100 Dogs Without Shelters. If you’d like to help, head on over here: http://wishes.causes.com/wishes/4457...fb_stream_wish

              To those of you having trouble tracking my comic book series, Dark Matter, at their local comic book store, might I remind you that you can always order copies from here: TFAW.com or digital versions here: digital.darkhorse.com

              Continuing our ongoing sneak preview of Dark Matter‘s next issue. Yesterday, I posted the first page of Dark Matter #3. Today, I repost it – along with the second page. If you haven’t read the first two issues, avert your eyes. Spoilers abound!

              For more previews, head on over here: http://www.comicbookresources.com/previews


              Mailbag:

              kathode writes: “Joe (or any of the Vancouverites on here), have you ever gone to French Made Baking, on Kingsway near the intersection with Main? (I think it’s a new place. Maybe just opened at the tail end of 2011?) People rave about their macarons on yelp.”

              Answer: Thanks for the tip. To be honest, I’ve never even heard of it. I’ll definitely check it out next week and report back.

              kathode also writes: “I have an extreme weakness for delicious desserts, a là Fratelli’s, on Commercial. (Sadly, though, Fratelli’s does not produce a cannoli up to my expectations. I don’t know why, with the sizable Italian population of this metropolis, I can’t find a decent cannoli here. WTF?!?)”

              Answer: Hmmm. Funny you should say that. Akemi and I just visited Commercial in our quest for pistachio cream. Alas, no luck. As someone who grew up in Montreal with its vast Italian offerings, I don’t find the Italian population of Vancouver all that sizable.

              profmadmax writes: “You never seem to mention ANYTHING Sanctuary related I notice…?Did the Sanctuary team have better foresight to go rogue and create a new medium in your opinion?”

              Answer: I never mention Sanctuary because I wasn’t involved in the production and it wasn’t a show I watched (though, to be fair, my viewing line-up is numbers about a half dozen). I’m not in a position to gauge the success of their initial online venture, but clearly the fact that they’ve been on the air for some four seasons is a testament to the hard work of former Stargate vets Amanda Tapping, Martin Wood, and Damian Kindler.

              profmadmax also writes: “Are you considering the successful(Sanctuarty)webisode approch to Dark Matter or the as yet unnamed horror project?”

              Answer: Nope, not the preferred approach for either project. Ideally, Dark Matter will be a television series (or mini-series, I’m liking this idea more and more given the property), while the horror movie will be a big screen feature. That’s the plan anyway.

              Tam Dixon writes: “Those macarons are impressive! Any other flavors planned?”

              Answer: Akemi is mixing the buttercream as we speak. We might do matcha, coconut, and speculous.

              StellaByStargate writes: “Emboldened by your last mailbag, I have one question to ask…and after all these years, I promise it will be my last S/J question ever…had we gotten the 3rd SG-1 movie, would the status of Sam and Jack’s post-Threads relationship have been made clear?”

              Answer: All I can say to that is that, there’s a dinner scene in the first draft of Stargate: Revolution that made it pretty clear that Jack and Sam were, in fact, together.

              Samantha Padilla writes: “I never thought of your thinking that Jack and Sam getting together after “Threads” was an AU, is it? Or is it actually a concensus between the SG-1?s writing staff that ‘Yep, Sam and Jack are together now, but we just won’t make that fact so obvious on screen it’s like a pie shoved in someone’s face’?”

              Answer: Neither AU nor consensus. There was never a discussion about it among the writers.
              sigpic
              The Sam Carter/Amanda Tapping Thunk thread The Sam/RepliCarter Ship Thread

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                http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...-dark-matters/

                March 2, 2012

                Photos: Pork buns, Dark Matter


                Akemi: I like Laboratory Retrievers.

                Me: Huh? You mean Labrador Retrievers?

                Akemi: Labo-ratory…

                Me: Labrador.

                Akemi: Labratory…

                Me: Labrador.

                Akemi: I like Labu-chans!

                Last night, Akemi made pork buns the likes of which you’re unlikely to find in most chinatowns...

                Well, things are certainly picking up on the creative front – and this after everything I said about wanting to take things a little easier this year. Just this morning, as a matter of fact, I was considering the prospect of doing a foodie tour of the U.S., hitting about a half dozen cities (San Francisco, Las Vegas, L.A., New Orleans, Boston, Chicago, New York) over the course of a two and a half week period to sample their culinary bests. It’s still doable but I now have a few more things on my mind...

                I had that conference call today about our comic book series, Dark Matter. Apparently, it has sparked the interest of a marquee feature director and his team. We had a great initial conversation about the prospective series, covering everything from tone and theme to the all-important character dynamics. They struck me as smart, creative and potentially a lot of fun to work with. A very promising first step. My homework this weekend is to polish the series overview and send it their way.

                Also today, my agent phoned to gauge my interest in show running a series based on a well-established horror property. I’ve been a huge fan of the creator since way back when and am certainly intrigued by the prospect of bringing this to series. More cautious optimism. Looks like I’ll be extra busy this weekend, reviewing.

                Still fiddling with the script for the horror movie trailer (Sorry, Ivon). I want it to be as tight (and unnerving) as possible and am still undecided on a couple of clips. I hope to have it done by tomorrow after which it’ll be smooooooooooth sailing!

                Continuing our sneak peek at the next issue of Dark Matter. Here are the first three pages of issue #3:

                More previews here: http://www.comicbookresources.com/previews
                sigpic
                The Sam Carter/Amanda Tapping Thunk thread The Sam/RepliCarter Ship Thread

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                  http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...m-my-time-off/

                  March 3, 2012

                  Photos: Jelly, Dark Matter


                  Whew! I spent much of the day working on the series overview for my SF space opera comic book (hopefully soon-to-be-television series) Dark Matter. I covered the major story arcs, from the individual backstories to the end of their respective journeys. I also included various images from the comic book to compliment the fifteen page document. Only problem now is that the file is a hefty 37.5 mb and not exactly easy to email. Looks like FedEx might be the way to go.

                  I sent it Paul’s way so he could do a quick pass on it before I send it out and he informed me that he is two thirds of the way through the pilot script he pitched me a couple of months ago. Damn. In order to get in all the projects we want to pitch, next time we’re in L.A. we may have to stay the whole week. That’s a lot of Ben & Jerry’s Red Velvet ice cream!

                  Also received notes from Ivon on the script for the horror trailer. Will work on incorporating his thoughts into a revised version. I’ll also have to give that last scene so more thought. I want that build up and payoff to that final image to leave a lasting impression. A lasting, unsettling impression. By the way, Ivon informed me of his purchase of our very first prop: a baseball cap. Exciting, no?

                  So I went to the bank yesterday and withdrew some cash. Among the bills I received was the new Canadian $100 bill and my first impression upon feeling it blindly in my pocket was: “This can’t be right. It must be counterfeit.” As it turns out, the bill’s unique qualities are intended to thwart counterfeiters. It’s composed of a polypropelyne substrate and includes some raised ink, transparent text, a metallic portrait, hidden numbers, and two transparent windows (once of which contains a hologram of what I believe is the Millennium Falcon). Not only is the new polymer bill more durable than the old banknote, but it is apparently far tastier...

                  Tonight, we’re off to have dinner at the Cooper’s where we’ll watch the final two episodes of Top Chef Texas. Go, Paul!

                  Continuing our preview of Dark Matter, here is a sneak peek at the first four pages of issue #3. The crew reacts to last issue’s shocking revelation...

                  More previews (Secret Avengers, Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season 9, The Strain) ici: http://www.comicbookresources.com/previews
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                    http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...t-chez-cooper/

                    March 4, 2012

                    Video: Pork belly

                    Photos: Trevor, dinner, Rob Cooper, Dark Matter


                    Well, well, well. If it isn’t my former assistant on that Toronto-based show, finally getting around to sending me a pic of himself enjoying Dark Matter. Trevor writes: “Look what finally came in! They kept selling out so fast I had to order them special from 1000000 Comix. I was so excited I read them simultaneously!” Now THAT is impressive. Apparently, he’s landed a gig as a script coordinator on a new series and is having a terrific time. Great to hear – although I was disappointed to learn that, despite the Name Trevor’s Baby Contest held on this blog, his wife insists on calling their daughter Ava instead of winning entry Eufemia.

                    Last night, we were invited to the Cooper house for an evening of pork bellies and Top Chef. When we arrived, we were ushered into the kitchen where we were greeted by this glorious sight:

                    According to Rob, when he asked the butcher for pork belly, an older female customer threw him an indignant look and cried: “It’s full of fat!”. Well…yeah…

                    After a string of disappointing visits to my go-to Vancouver restaurants, I was pleased that this semi-regular favorite continues to impress. Highly recommended, but book early to avoid disappointment.

                    After dinner, we headed downstairs to screen the final two episodes of Top Chef Texas. My thoughts?

                    S

                    P

                    O

                    I

                    L

                    E

                    R

                    S

                    Meh. When I watched the premiere, I pegged Sara as the one to beat. As the season progressed, it became clear that Paul was the guy to beat. So I suppose it was only fitting that the two would meet in the finale, a finale which was, surprisingly, underwhelming. I think a lot of it had to do with the fact that it took place in my backyard, here in Vancouver. When I heard that Top Chef was coming to Vancouver, I wondered which of the city’s top restaurants would be featured on the show. Would it be West? Bishops? Maybe somewhere hip like L’Abattoir? Perhaps they would go with someplace delightfully unexpected like La Quercia? Nope. According to the show, the chefs would take over two of Vancouver’s top restaurants: Italian Kitchen and Black + Blue. Vancouver’s top restaurants? Maybe part of the top 250! And what Canadian chef would be making a guest appearance on the show? Would it be Susur Lee or Chuck Hughes or local fave Vikram Vij? Nope, it was none other than Toronto’s Mark McKewan, coincidentally the head judge of the unwatchable Top Chef Canada (I’ll save my rant on the crap programming served up by Food Network Canada for a later date. I used to leave the Food Network on as background noise for the dogs but I think my dogs deserve better than Family Cook Off, Ice Cold Cash, and You Gotta Eat Here). Anyway, the two finalists faced off and, in the end, the best chef won.

                    Finally, continuing our sneak peek at Dark Matter #3.

                    More previews here: Previews – Comic Book Resources
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                      http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...-superman-iii/

                      March 5, 2012

                      Photos: Superman III


                      Superman III so bad it make Superman II look like Superman I! It as if director Richard Lester read monster’s reviews and den, out of spite, get Superman to spin world backward so he can go back in time and inklude everyting me hate so much about first two movies in first five minutes of dis turd. Kooky musik play as guy walk into pole, girl in rollerblades knock phone booths over, blind man mistake street painter for seeing eye dog, old man get bucket of yellow paint on head, blind man walk thru painting, mime slip and fall on marblez, guy get pie in da face, etc. And dis just opening creditz! Phoo-wee. Already, dis movie stink like Fozzie Bear at hot yoga class. If Buster Keaton ever make comeback, Richard Lester your guy!

                      We introduced to Gus Gorman. He lovable loozer dat can’t hold down job. Just like Grover before he start mangosteen juice franchise. Gus get job as computer programmer and, in no time, become hacker genius. Find way to redirekt extra fraktion cents from everybody else paychek into his own – and make $85k+ on first try! Me have to admit, dis very brilliant idea. Remind monster of time Oscar da Grouch run similar scam. Except instead of stealing money from checkz, he steal cash. And instead of from co-workerz, he take from strangers. And instead of computer program, he use rusty pipe and strong language.

                      Gus seem like smart guy. But not really. Boss of company (Napoleon Solo) told dat someone steal $85k+ from company but no way to track it. In olden days possible becuz people check everyting dat go in and out but nowadays have to rely on lazy computerz so no way to know. UNTIL Gus drive to work in flashy sportscar. Den Napoleon Solo say “Aha!” and offer Gus deal. Gus have to use computer to command weather satellite to cause storm dat wipe out coffee crop in Columbia. Weather satellite can control weather? Of course! Dat why it called WEATHER satellite!

                      Meanwile, back at Metropolis, Clark get permishiun to go back to Smallville for high school reunion. And Lois get permishiun to go on vacashun to Bermuda. Monster tink “Aha! Writerz so smart. Lois going to go to Bermuda and get stuck in storm!” But writerz fool monster by not even bother to take advantage of Lois charakter. She gone for most of movie and, instead, we follow dopey couple we don’t know who visit Columbia and get caught in storm and watch giant piece of church roof fall and land on head of parishish parshishi church people.

                      On way to Smallville, bus stop at site of chemikal fire. Superman arrive on scene just as two guyz run out of building on fire. Superman ask: “Chief, how can I help?” Monster think: “Would be nice if you could put out dose two guyz” but instead Supes fly into building and chat wit scientist watching acid vaporize. Need to cool tings down but problem wit water pressure! So Superman fly to lake five miles away, freeze water wit super breath, den fly giant ice piece back and drop it on factory. For some reazon, it instantly melt and put out fire instead of crush everybody like me hoping.

                      Superman return to Smallville. Meet up wit Lana Lang and her kid and hilarious abusive alcoholic ex-boyfriend. Superman teach Lana Lang kid valuable lessons like cheating a-okay (by using super breath to help kid win at bowling) and lying a-okay too (by showing up for kidz birtday after kid tell everyone Superman coming even though Superman not have plan to go and probably not like buttercream icing anyway). Clark go on piknik wit Lana and son. For some reazon kid fall asleep in middle of field during treshing season. Superman save before he end up like Cookie’s second cuzin Froppet whoze frozen lemonade stand shut down by municipal snow blower. Permanently.

                      Meanwhile, Napoleon Solo decide he want to kill Superman. He diskuss wit Gus who, in stoopidest scene of many of movie’s stoopid scenes, Gus akcidentally ski off top of building wearing pink tablecloth cape, fall turdy floors, land on slanted (GLASS!!!) roof and slide onto street. Kidz, don’t try dis AT home! Unless you wear helmet – den okay. Napoleon Solo make Gus use weather satellite to analize fragment of kriptonite (don’t ask). Not able to identify one element so Gus make it up, den lab make kriptonite and Gus show up at Superman parade and give it to Superman.

                      But not pure kriptonite. Instead of kill Superman, just make him very cranky. He get drunk.

                      He fix leaning tower of Pizza so not leaning anymore and Italian stereotype in front of ****ty green screen very angry. He blow out Olympic torch. He punch hole in oil tanker (Oh, yeah. Monster forget. Bad guy redirekt oil tankerz to middle of Atlantic. Need to include dis crooshal piece of informashun or movie make even less sense.).

                      But Superman conflikted. He fight inner battle dat become outer battle when he split in two: Superman and Clark Kent. How possible? Well not, but dis franchize stop making sense two moviez ago. Superman fight Clark Kent in junk yard. Try to crush him in compactor. Trow him into giant vat of acid (standard eqwipment in most junk yardz). Clark strangle Superman, killing him. Den open up shirt to reveal: S! Superman back!!! Yay?

                      Bad guys fly around in air balloon chairs. For some reazon.

                      Superman follow dem to hideout where dey built supercomputer. Superman fight supercomputer. Gus feel bad and want to help. Big booby girl feel bad and want to help too. Napoleon Solo sister not feel bad at all and turn into computer tingie -

                      But Superman win! He save Gus and, for some reazon, drop him off instead of leave him wit everybody else to be arrested. Den Superman go back to Metropolis where Daily Planet get new computerized bingo machine. It explode, reinforcing movie message: “Computerz bad! Stay stooped!”

                      Verdikt: Superman moviez = super crap. 0 for 3 so far wit super-crappy-looking Superman IV next after even super-crappier looking Supergirl.

                      Rating: 1/2 chocolate chippee cookie and 1 broken button.

                      Pleaze diskuss.

                      P.S. Cookie now have own movie review website here: Film reviews by resident film criti… Tell your friends!
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                        http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...atter-mailbag/

                        March 6, 2012

                        Video: Supergirl trailer

                        Photos: Dark Matter


                        Thanks to everyone who took the time to support guest reviewer Cookie Monster by subjecting themselves to watching Superman III as part of this blog’s Supermovie of the Week Club. Lots of great commentary from some of you and Cookie Monster truly appreciates the input. I know, I know. You’re no doubt thinking: “Well, at least it can’t get any worse.” No? Feast your eyes on this trailer for next week’s supermovie club selection: Supergirl!

                        Console yourselves in Helen Slater’s cuteness and press on.

                        Picking up (and concluding) our sneak peek at Dark Matter #3…(Spoiler abound!):

                        More previews here: http://www.comicbookresources.com/previews. Swamp Thing #7! Hulk #50! Fatale #3! Ragemoor #1!

                        Today’s entry is dedicated to Woody.


                        Mailbag:

                        jys writes: “going to E by jose andres on wednesday”

                        Answer: As Akemi would say: “Luckeeeeeeeeeeeee!”. Take pics and report back. Let me know if they serve the uni sandwich!

                        Randomness writes: “I think the worst thing about having a pet put to sleep, besides the grief that follows is no doubt the helplessness that you can’t do anything to make someone you regard as part of the family well again. The realisation of that if anything is the most heartbreaking though.”

                        Answer: So true. Even though the doctors said the radiation therapy had helped extend Maximus’s life (another six months after the initial diagnosis which was three months more than the mid-treatment prognosis), there was much sadness and frustration at the end. There’s no worse feeling than the hopelessness that comes when you’ve run out of options.

                        gforce writes: “How does taking a screw out of the super computer shut it down? It just doesn’t make sense! Also, where did that canister of acid come from?”

                        Answer: All very good points. Clearly there was too much atrociousness in this movie to cover in a single review.

                        DP writes: “40 minutes in and rich people recognize that pilfering money through computers makes Gus ideal material to help them drown people with weather and be okay morally with it.”

                        Answer: Yeah, I wonder how many people Gus killed or seriously injured with his manufactured storm? Yet the dizzy blond goes to prison while he gets to walk!

                        DP also writes: “100 minutes in and it’s so completely pointless that the tourist couple berates the editor for not predicting an aberration of all known weather science.”

                        Answer: Yes, this sequence was hilarious for all the wrong reasons.

                        Thornyrose writes: “A picnic where Lana’s cooking is brought into question(Clark eats dog food, yuk yuk) and a picnic where there is a thunderstorm in the distance.”

                        Answer: At first I wondered why the hell would these idiots choose to picnic with a storm approaching. I assumed it was just laziness on the part of the writers and that the storm would figure into some sort of action sequence. And then, when it didn’t, I was left wondering why the hell introduce the looming storm in the first place?

                        woody writes: “We had to put our cat to sleep. She was a part of our family for almost 20 years. My oldest son of 30 is taking it the hardest. He’s mentally handicapped and Garfield slept on his bed almost every night. We’re gonna miss her. Thank you for just taking the time to read this.”

                        Answer: Condolences, Woody. I truly do empathize having gone through it in January with my boy Max. Reflect back on the happy memories.

                        glowyzoey writes: “Can’t comment on Top Chef or Top Chef Canada, but I must get my Drive-ins, Diners and Dives fix every day and Eat St. whenever possible. Maybe my tastes are a little low brow, but you gotta love the creativity of the cooks. Still not sure how to take Iron Chef America. Is it serious or goofy or something in between? Have you watched Triple D and what do you think of it?”

                        Answer: Love all three of the shows you mentioned. Just last week, I did my version of a Vietnamese sandwich recipe I saw on Triple D. Eat St. is great, but it always leaves me frustrated because it’s unlikely I’ll get the opportunity to sample most of the amazing food trucks profiled. As for Iron Chef America – it takes its cue from the original Iron Chef, a Japanese production that was part culinary samurai duel, part over-the-top showmanship, and part spectacular culinary creations. The American version is produced along the same lines with the added bonus of being hosted by the terrific (Stargate alum) Mark Dacascos.

                        Sue Rann writes: “BTW, I see you’re currently reading about Renaissance Italy – have you read Niccolo Macchiavelli? “Before all else, be armed.” My youngest daughter has been enjoying herself lately working for him as a cold-blooded killer while playing ‘Assassin’s Creed: Brotherhood’.”

                        Answer: Machiavelli is a character in a video game? Interesting.

                        Nate writes: “Have you been to Siena on 12th and Granville yet? It’s owned by the same person who owns CRU. My wife and I went last Saturday evening and it was very good and priced well.”

                        Answer: Hadn’t even heard of it. Thanks for bringing it to my attention.

                        Mike from Victoria writes: “Should I start watching SGA now as well, or just run through all of SG1 then watch Atlantis?”

                        Answer: I’d finish with SG-1 and the movies first before proceeding onto Atlantis.

                        Deni writes: “I’m in for The Fifth Element, as well. You in, Joecito?”

                        Answer: Alas, no. Not a superhero movie.

                        kathode writes: “I think the difference between this one and Superman II is that I was expecting so much more from #2 and didn’t get it: no interesting or sufficiently motivated villains; no heart-wrenching drama; no sensible plot. And with #3, I wasn’t expecting any of that…”

                        Answer: In other words, you accepted the fact that these people who produced the first two were incapable of making a good movie, so you were expecting atrocious and were pleasantly surprised by something that was just awful? Skiing off a building in a pink tablecloth? If actually liked the original 1966 Batman because it was silly and over-the-top. Superman III just felt sad and tired.

                        Kathode also writes: “But aside from that misstep, a lot of the humor bits in Superman III worked for me.”

                        Answer: I have to admit, I did laugh at the line: “I ask you to kill the Superman and you’re telling me you couldn’t do that one simple thing?”.

                        Kathode also writes: “Of course the worst things Superman can think of to do are all about playing pranks and impressing a hot girl!”

                        Answer: Uh, I think he did more than “impress” her.
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                          http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...w-t-v-edition/

                          March 7, 2012

                          Video: Jelly

                          Photos: Jelly


                          Poor Jelly. She went in for her dental today. She certainly knew something was up the moment I buckled her into the car. Check out how nervous she was...

                          It’s always same thing when we visit the vet. She’ll tremble all the way there and in the waiting room. Then, once I’ve checked in with the front desk, she inevitably pulls the “Well, I guess we’re done here” strategy and casually walks over to the door, waits, then throws me a look, part annoyed, part impatient, that seems to ask: “You coming already?”. At which point I invariably scoop her up and redirect her back into the waiting area.

                          After having another eight extracted on this latest visit, her tooth count now stands at 12! As a result, as of today, in the event she attacks, Jelly is officially more likely to gum you to death.

                          Big day tomorrow. I have a conference call in the morning about that horror series I mentioned a couple of posts back (a preliminary call to gauge everyone’s interest and make sure we’re all on the same page), and one in the afternoon about Dark Matter (in which we dial in another player on the increasingly widening game plan). Also tomorrow, I’ve got to start thinking about the rewrite of the horror script. I got Paul’s notes and, while I don’t disagree with any of his concerns, I’m not quite sure how I’m going to address all of them. Suggestions? Ivon, meanwhile, is hard at work on the trailer, assembling some great footage and appropriately ominous audio. We’re getting together for lunch to discuss what we’ve got so far – and celebrate his birthday over tacos and Mexican rice milk!

                          Well, the news that House is about to wrap up its final season means one less show on my regular viewing rotation currently made up of: House, Spartacus, Breaking Bad, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Game of Thrones, The Office, 30 Rock, The Walking Dead, Survivor, and The Amazing Race. That seems like a lot and yet I know people (Martin Gero, SGU VFX Supervisor Mark Savela) who seem to find time to watch everything. On the other hand, you have someone like Akemi who limits her t.v. viewing to a couple of show on dvd (lately, she’s been doing marathon sessions of South Park and Sex and the City).

                          Which brings me a little game I’m going to call: “It may surprise you to know…”. In today’s version of the game, let’s focus on t.v. I want to know what show it may surprise everyone to hear you actually enjoy. Are you a closet Teen Mom fan? Is your DVR set to record Toddlers and Tiaras? Are you still bemoaning the premature cancellation of Cavemen? I want to hear all about it. As for me: It may surprise you to know that I don’t hate Sex and the City. I actually think it’s a clever, amusing, well-written series (although I hear the franchise went off the rails with the movies). It’s not a show I actually ever sat down to watch but one that has always been on, like background music, enjoyed by the women in my life. While Ibusy doing other things around the house, I somehow managed to acquire an understanding and appreciation of the series through osmosis. Big is all wrong for Carrie! How could she have dumped Aidan? And is Charlotte just adorable?
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                            http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...rs-of-horrors/

                            March 8, 2012

                            Photos: Ruby, Ivon Bartok, Robert Cooper, lunch at La Tacqueria, pistachio chocolates


                            Over the past two months, I’ve had a lot of friends send me pictures of themselves reading my comic book, Dark Matter, obviously seeking to impress in the hopes that I will think of them when it comes time to cast the series/mini-series. While I’ve certainly appreciated the gestures, none have really moved me enough to decide right there and then: “That’s it! I have to cast this individual!”. That is until today when I received the above pic from my former Stargate ace editor Mike Banas P.I. Mike informs me that he and wife (former Stargate Associate Producer Jennifer Johnson) have been so busy working on home renovations that their dog, Ruby, has had to entertainment herself.

                            I guess it’s true what they say. Golden Retrievers ARE smart dogs!

                            Today, I celebrated Ivon R. Bartok Day by going to lunch with the birthday boy. We were joined by Robert Cooper at La Tacqueria for – what else? – tacos!

                            We talked projects on the go including Rob’s own terrific horror feature (based on true events!) that I’m sure he’ll tell you all about the next time he swings by for a Q&A. We got together for a couple of hours and then it was time for Ivon to head back to his place and get back to work on our horror movie sizzle reel. Birthday or not, that trailer aint gonna produce itself!

                            Two conference calls scheduled for today but the second one, rescheduled from last week, has been rescheduled to next week. The first one, I’m pleased to report, went very well. We discussed a terrific property that, if done right, would be a lot of fun to work on. The people I spoke with are apparently eager to get going, so Paul and I will take the weekend to go over the source material and then get back to them early next week and see whether we’re on the same page creatively and production-wise. In the meantime, our agent will continue his inquiries.

                            It would seem that, lately, everything is coming up horror for me. From a creative standpoint anyway. Over the past few days, I’ve been working on fleshing out the story for a new horror feature idea (I do some of my best thinking while I’m driving or walking the dogs) I’d like to get started on once I’ve finished my rewrite on the first one. I’ve lined up some horror viewing to get me in the proper mind frame: The Devil’s Backbone, Cold Prey, Calvaire, and Imprint (Takashi Miike’s banned episode from the Masters of Horror series). Of course, I’ll be watching alone. Akemi can barely get through an episode of The Walking Dead.

                            Fortunately, while I’m focused on screening horror movies, she can turn her mind to equally productive matters. Like, say, making pistachio chocolates...

                            Some interesting entries in the “It May Surprise You To Know (t.v. edition)…” And plenty of surprises. Reminds me of the time Ming-Na told me she was a closet Hoarders fan.

                            Today’s blog entry is dedicated to belated birthday gal Deni!
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                              http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...mpany-outings/

                              March 9, 2012

                              Photos: Drinking: Please do it at home, capsule hotel


                              While I’ve been immersed in my esoteric/artistic pursuits (writing that horror script, pitching that scifi series, fielding show running opportunities, waiting around for conference calls that never happen, etc.), Akemi has been doing her own thing – specifically, attending English classes three to four times a week. The classes vary, from pronunciation to idioms to conversation in which the students and teacher discuss all sorts of topics: tea, poutine and, today, social drinking.

                              As some of you may (or may not) know, social drinking is an important part of professional life in Asia. For instance, in Japan, a lot of the time, when work ends at the office, a whole new phase of the job begins at the local watering hole where salaryman get together with co-workers, bosses, or prospective clients to discuss business and drink, drink, drink! There’s nothing quite as surreal as being out on the streets of Tokyo at around 11:00 p.m. when the various bars and restaurants disgorge their inebriated clientele, pleasantly pickled as they wind and stagger their way to the nearest metro to catch the last train home (otherwise it’s a night at the capsule hotel for them!).

                              Beet-faced, perspiring, ties and jackets askew – occasionally boisterous, sometimes vomitous – they’re a far cry from their staid daytime selves. On my last trip to Tokyo with my buddy Ivon, we would pass them on our way back to the hotel – singing, shouting, crouched down by some bushes throwing up dinner. It’s all part of social custom promoting company harmony and it’s considered downright rude not to drink, or to drink too slowly if someone else is buying. According to one of Akemi’s fellow students, a Taiwanese national, these work-related outings can go on for a while. His longest clocked in at an impressive/insane 20 hours. 20 hours! Seriously, we’re talking about a business meeting here, not spring break in Tijuana!

                              Over the course of our professional lives, I’m sure that we’ve all had to participate in some irksome work-related activities be it to close a deal, secure a promotion, or satisfy Martha from accounts receivable that you had nothing to do with the recent spate of missing staplers. So, I want to know: What was the worst business outing you’ve ever attended? In my case, I think it was the mandatory company picnic where I was forced to participate in an impromptu game of volleyball and, later, caught by my boss trying to slip away during the archery competition. For what it’s worth, the food wasn’t very good either.
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                                http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...opportunities/

                                March 10, 2012


                                It’s nice to be wanted. Really. Over the past few weeks, my agent has brought me no less than three potential show running opportunities on projects (presumably) ready to go. All are interesting possibilities. Of course having said that, interesting things generally command closer scrutiny, and closer scrutiny commonly yields explanations, details, and demystification. What at first may seem very interesting often ends up being much less so. For a variety of reasons. Well, in the case of show running opportunities, two: creative and production. Creatively: Is it any good? Am I on the same page with the producers/broadcasters? Do we all want to make the same show? How willing are they to allow me to address some of the issues I have with the show’s premise or the existing scripts? Will they trust me to make the best show possible? Production: How much money will we have to make the show? Given the concept and the existing scripts, is it possible to make the show within the established parameters? Where will the show be shot? Will they trust me to make the best show possible?

                                Ideally, the answers to all these questions will be yes, yes, yes, very, yes, a lot, yes, somewhere I’d enjoy spending time, and yes – but, realistically, you’ll probably have to compromise on a couple of these points (and sub-points). And just how much you’re willing to compromise will depend on several things – like how much you love the project, how much control you’ll have over it, whether or not it’s a good opportunity, and whether it will be worth your while. So far as I’m concerned, the easiest type of project to say no to is one that fails the creative questions, especially the first one: Is it any good? I have to like a show to work on it. I know, I know. It seems obvious, but I’d hazard to say that there are a lot of people out there working at jobs they hate. Film and television is no different. Still, after 11+ years on Stargate, I’m thankfully in a position where I can be a little choosey. I have to like the show I’ll be working on. Unfortunately, liking a show isn’t enough. There’s nothing worse than being offered a fantastic show and then not being given the tools to properly execute its potential.

                                So many things can go wrong on a production, but when they go right, the results are spectacular. And, looking at some of the spectacular shows I enjoy, I see the same like variable: a strong creative show runner driving the production, whether it’s David Chase on The Sopranos, Vince Gilligan on Breaking Bad, Shawn Ryan on The Shield, Mitchell Hurwitz on Arrested Development, or Larry David on Curb You Enthusiasm. I’m not saying that all shows with strong creative show runners are necessarily great, but I am saying that every great show I can think of had a strong creative show runner at the helm. All extremely talented; all obviously very passionate about their respective series.

                                So, in the end, that’s all I ask for: the opportunity to work on a show I can feel passionate about; a show that will prove as interesting on its first day of production as it did on the day it was first pitched to me. Is that too much to ask?
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