Joseph Mallozzi's Blog! (SPOILERS For All SG Shows and Dark Matter)

[wurlitzer153]

Look four posts above you, the wordpress blog is gonna be his main one with backups on blogspot. Comment only on wordpress.

[Pharaoh Atem]

Look four posts above you, the wordpress blog is gonna be his main one with backups on blogspot. Comment only on wordpress.

ok sorry i'm still catching up

[wurlitzer153]

http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...arkhorse-wins/

December 30, 2007: Misquotes, luncheon meat, and my darkhorse wins!

Over the course of a given season, I may do anywhere from 30 to 50 interviews. Given the choice, I always prefer a face to face with the interviewer as it allows for an amiable, relaxed, and fairly straight-forward conversation. Steve Eramo is a guy who has interviewed me countless times and it’s always a pleasure to talk to him because he knows the show, he does his homework, and he always comes prepared. While we talk, he’ll have his digital recorder on, recording the conversation for later reference. His Stargate articles make for interesting, informative and, above all else, comprehensible reading. If I’m unable to meet with an interviewer, I prefer to go the email route. They can send me the questions, give me about a week, and I’ll send them back my answers. This is the process I tend to prefer when doing interviews for fan sites as it’s quick and simple, and I can ensure my answers are hopefully enlightening, occasionally humorous and, most important of all, intelligible. Although I’m usually not a fan of live interviews, I have done more than a few over the years and, as time has gone on, I’ve grown more comfortable with them. The radio interview I did for HiSciFi last year is a great example. It was fun, relaxed, and - here’s the key - coherent. Which brings us to my least favored means of conducting an interview: the dreaded phoner. The problem with phoners is that they put you at the mercy of the potentially crappy call quality and the potentially crappy recording of that potentially crappy call quality. Words are dropped and misinterpreted, leading to confusion and, every so often, quotes that are the exact opposite of their original intent. This, in turn, leads to all sorts of problems - like the that time I was credited with a controversial quote that actually belonged to my writing partner Paul, or the recent interview I did for SliceOfSciFi, a transcribed phoner in which I sound alternately imbecilic, inebriated, and outright insane. I’m sure the gang at SoSF did their best trying to make sense of what was said, but I contacted them after the initial interview was posted and asked them to double-check a couple of the more egregious errors (Like the quote that made it sound like Weir was coming back full-time. A nice sentiment but not what I had said). Still, even the revised version is problematic in some respects (Like that truly terrible pic of me. But I suppose I should consider myself fortunate. Do a search of Martin Gero and you’ll see the pic used for him was actually a cropped gag photo he took a last Christmas of him and his girlfriend in matching holiday sweaters sitting on Santa’s lap) so I’d like to clarify a few points for those who have read the interview and assume I’ve somehow lost it. Without even touching the meandering run-on-sentences and sentence fragments that don’t make a whole lots of sense…

“When he pushed out the idea…”

- Should read “when he pitched out the idea…”

“All that has obviously soured certain fans towards Joe and when certain fans are unhappy they will be very vocal.”

- That’s “the show” and not “Joe”. I’m assuming fans don’t hold Joe F. responsible for the cast changes. On the other hand, the Joe in question could be me which would make sense given that I can be held responsible for the cast changes, but I usually don’t refer to myself in the third person.

“when you factor in DVR and such and the lead off viewers across the board…”

- That’s “bleed-off” and not “lead off”.

“…it worked great for us in the beginning especially in the ranks of the Wraith…”

- No idea. Sorry.

“…vengeance I declare! A reign of fiery destruction on the heads of all those who would doubt or oppose my creative vision! The unbelievers shall be punished and made to regret their ways!”

- Silly. That should read “rain” and not “reign”.

Finally, I’m pleased to announce that with today’s win by the Cleveland Browns win (coupled with a Tampa Bay loss - sorry, Paul), I am the official winner of our office dark horse pool. I will probably blow the $100 on books, dvd’s, or a pricey appetizer.

Whoo-Hoo!!! Go Browns!

Today’s pics: Mom pretends she’s enjoying herself, mmmm luncheon meat.

Let’s catch up on the mailbag -

Annie from Freemantle writes: “Do you CG erase any urban construction that’s not meant to be in the shot ?”

Answer: Yes, if need be we will have our visual effects department effect any necessary cosmetic changes.

DeeinSouthAfrica writes: “ doesn’t your mom have a cellphone? Surely she could have ducked into the bathroom and called you?”

Answer: She does but either never carries it with her or doesn’t bother to answer it.

Padawan Aneiki writes: “When you’re shooting an episode, how do you decide to block each scene?”

Answer: That is the director’s job. He envisions how the scene will play out and then, on the day, takes the actors and crew through the blocking scheme he has in mind.

Josh Hancock writes: “1) do you think there might be a possibility that series 5 of SGA might have to have some extra episodes to help fill in the slots where programmes will be missing due to the writer’s strike? 2) Will there be more Lanteans in the new series?”

Answers: 1) No. We will be producing the usual 20 episodes this season. 2) No idea.

Morgia a ecrit: “Ce que je me demande c’est si une personne de votre équipe (ou extérieur) est capable de vous critiquer (toi et les autres scénaristes) lorsque vous écrivez vos épisodes.”

Reponse: Quand un scenario est ecrit, il est critiqué par les autres scenaristes, puis récrit avant que le studio, SciFi, le directeur, et les acteurs offrent leurs avis.

Sort of translation: After a script is written, it is critiqued by the other writers before being re-written - at which point the studio, SciFi, the director, and the actors weigh in with their comments.

Arctic Goddess writes: “Now that you are using a new blog location, what happens regarding the millionth poster? Is that now finished?”

Answer: Nope. I’ll simply take the combined stats of both blogs into account. 812 152 and counting…

Shiningwit writes: “With The Ark of Truth having been prematurely leaked do you know who it was that leaked it and what course of action has been taken?”

Answer: That is currently being investigated.

Chelledb writes: “We would like to know if it is at all possible that either Major’s Lorne, Marks and Davis could be promoted in the near future.”

Answer: It’s possible. Stay tuned.

Poundpuppy29 writes: “I have a question about Continuum do Daniel & Vala have any emotional moments with each other?”

Answer: If you mean emotional in the way I think you mean, then no

Poundpuppy29 also writes: “ Are you doing any commentaries for season 4?”

Answer: If I have time, I certainly will. But then again, I think I’ve pretty much covered everything in my post-episode write-ups

[wurlitzer153]

http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...icentiousness/

Probably easier to read here: http://josephmallozzi.blogspot.com/2...r-31-2007.html

New Poem!!!

This same time last year, on a bit of a lark
I thought I would take some time off from the snark,
And compose a brief poem filled with puzzling clues,
For fans of the show to deduce should they choose.

As such I suppose I’ve raised expectations,
That this year include some like revelations,
Ensconced in an opus of rhythm and rhyme,
Awaiting discovery from those who have time.

While I hadn’t intended to write one this season,
I suppose it should certainly stand within reason,
That in order to get you to give it a rest,
I author another and grant your request.

So here is this year’s abstruse composition,
Designed for you fans who possess the volition,
To examine and study its cryptic contents,
In a bid to unearth hints to future events.

The brilliant one slowly loses his mind,
While a group of replacements puts the team in a bind.

Wallace’s research a menace let loose.
The key to success is compress not diffuse.

A relationship blossoms, an engagement is planned.
An old enemy sweeps down and gains the upper hand.

In an underground chamber the trio is stuck,
While Sheppard battles some really bad luck.

A corpse is discovered and John plays detective.
The city assailed by mutations infective.

Call the doctor from Earth to help us take action,
As the death of a loved one spurs McKay into action.

Get talked into escorting a precocious young brat.
The experiment’s minions the team will combat.

A battle is waged on the defender’s home field,
And the means of production is fully revealed.

Two warriors head off an incursion on Earth.
A mission is snagged by an untimely birth.

The status quo shifts, a power play made.
The arrival of this one leave some feeling dismayed.

An old friend returns, loyalties are reversed,
And a ghost from the past has us fearing the worst.

Atlantis the target of a mysterious race,
While myriad permutations are viewed from space.

So just like last year here are intriguing notions,
Sure to, no doubt, stir up strong fan emotions.
But do keep in mind while you revel or groan,
That it’s still very early. Nothing’s written in stone.

[prion]

Stuck my guesses in BOLD


The brilliant one slowly loses his mind,
McKay loses his marbles? This should be fun.
While a group of replacements puts the team in a bind.

Wallace’s research a menace let loose.
OUTCAST
The key to success is compress not diffuse.

A relationship blossoms, an engagement is planned.
Rodney and Katie? - QUARANTINE?
An old enemy sweeps down and gains the upper hand.

In an underground chamber the trio is stuck,
TRIO
While Sheppard battles some really bad luck.
Oooh.....

A corpse is discovered and John plays detective.
The city assailed by mutations infective.
QUARANTINE

Call the doctor from Earth to help us take action,
As the death of a loved one spurs McKay into action.
I bet they kill off Katie BRown

Get talked into escorting a precocious young brat.
HARMONY
The experiment’s minions the team will combat.

A battle is waged on the defender’s home field,
And the means of production is fully revealed.

Two warriors head off an incursion on Earth.
OUTCAST
A mission is snagged by an untimely birth.

The status quo shifts, a power play made.
The arrival of this one leave some feeling dismayed.

An old friend returns, loyalties are reversed,
Beckett - BE ALL MY SINS REMEMBER'D
And a ghost from the past has us fearing the worst.

Atlantis the target of a mysterious race,
While myriad permutations are viewed from space.

So just like last year here are intriguing notions,
Sure to, no doubt, stir up strong fan emotions.
But do keep in mind while you revel or groan,
That it’s still very early. Nothing’s written in stone.

[PG15]

Wow...ok, that is vague and strange..and I think one of them is This Mortal Coil...

Yeah, this is gonna last us a while.

[Ltcolshepjumper]

This same time last year, on a bit of a lark
I thought I would take some time off from the snark,
And compose a brief poem filled with puzzling clues,
For fans of the show to deduce should they choose.

As such I suppose I’ve raised expectations,
That this year include some like revelations,
Ensconced in an opus of rhythm and rhyme,
Awaiting discovery from those who have time.

While I hadn’t intended to write one this season,
I suppose it should certainly stand within reason,
That in order to get you to give it a rest,
I author another and grant your request.

So here is this year’s abstruse composition,
Designed for you fans who possess the volition,
To examine and study its cryptic contents,
In a bid to unearth hints to future events.

The brilliant one slowly loses his mind Tabula Rasa or Quarantine,
While a group of replacements puts the team in a bind This Mortal coil.

Wallace’s research a menace let loose Outcast.
The key to success is compress not diffuse Possibly BAMSR.

A relationship blossoms, an engagement is planned Quarantine- Katie and Mckay.
An old enemy sweeps down and gains the upper hand Kindred- Michael.

In an underground chamber the trio is stuck Trio,
While Sheppard battles some really bad luck The Last Man?.

A corpse is discovered and John plays detective Outcast?.
The city assailed by mutations infective Quarantine.

Call the doctor from Earth to help us take action No clue. Midway- Dr. Lee; Kavanaugh?,
As the death of a loved one spurs McKay into action Quarantine- Katie Brown dies.

Get talked into escorting a precocious young brat Harmony.
The experiment’s minions the team will combat Kindred- Michael's experiments.

A battle is waged on the defender’s home field BAMSR,
And the means of production is fully revealed Spoils of War- Wraith birthing.

Two warriors head off an incursion on Earth I'm thinking Midway- tealc and ronon vs Wraith.
A mission is snagged by an untimely birth Kindred- Teyla's pregnancy.

The status quo shifts, a power play made BASMR; Spoils of War.
The arrival of this one leave some feeling dismayed Kindred- Beckett.

An old friend returns Kindred- Beckett, loyalties are reversed BAMSR,
And a ghost from the past has us fearing the worst Kindred- Michael/ Beckett.

Atlantis the target of a mysterious race The Last Man?,
While myriad permutations are viewed from space Midway possibly.

So just like last year here are intriguing notions,
Sure to, no doubt, stir up strong fan emotions.
But do keep in mind while you revel or groan,
That it’s still very early. Nothing’s written in stone.

[Alan]

HAPPY NEW YEAR
EVERYONE!!!

ALL THE BEST IN 2008!!!

[Alipeeps]

Hee. Interesting to see the amount of folks replying in rhyme in the comments section... including one person who, I have to say, should have their computer confiscated for crimes against the English language. Sorry, but that is truly one of the worst attempts at poetry (not to mention the English language in general - e.g. spelling and even correct use of words! :Hint: "glee" is not a verb! "plee" is not even a WORD!) that I've ever seen!

[PG15]

Plee?!

Ok, I'm gonna start using that word from now on. It's just so pleeful.

[Pitry]

Plee?!

Ok, I'm gonna start using that word from now on. It's just so pleeful.

This pun is just horrid. I'm pleeing you to stop!

[PG15]

No pleeing way! I'm gonna use it for as plee as I wanted to plee!

Plee.

[Briangate78]

No pleeing way! I'm gonna use it for as plee as I wanted to plee!

Plee.

Well that's cool just don't pee, we'll then have to walk in it.

[Repli!kat]

To Plee or not to Plee, that is the question.

[PG15]

http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...ear-no-really/

January 1, 20078

Photos: Food!

Write-Up: Joe rings in the new year with 5 Must-Read New Years Resolutions:

1. Be less charitable: By this, I don’t mean make fewer contributions to charity (by all means, continue sending your annual donation to the Mottled Orange Ferret Organization); simply be a whole lot less accommodating to those around you. Now I realize this sounds a tad selfish, but that’s only because it is. A tad. But believe me, it’ll make your life a whole lot easier. Montague and Trudy just called to let you know they’re running late? F ’em! Start dinner at the appointed time and have them play catch-up on what’s left of the leg of roast while you polish off their slices of sachertorte. Best case scenario: they’ll learn a valuable lesson and the rest of your dinner party will thank you. Even better than best case scenario: they end up offended and you lose their friendship, meaning one less holiday greeting to worry about when the time comes.

2. Be less patient: This one goes hand in hand with the aforementioned resolution and goes a long way toward putting on notice all of the coasting nimrods and jerks who take advantage of your stolid equanimity. Stop thinking of life as a series of compromises. That kind of attitude aspires to adequacy. Don’t lower your expectations and never feel sorry for anyone. Next time you go to a fancy restaurant and the waiter asks “Sir, how were the short ribs?”, tell him the truth: “They tasted like urine-soaked balsa wood shavings sauced with the residue of last week‘s pan scrapings. But, on the bright side, they were immeasurably better than whatever the hell you served my wife.”

3. Be less accommodating: When I first started blogging, I vowed to keep the comments section open to all opinions, from the high-and-mighty to the occasionally caustic. I felt it important that all voices be given a forum. In retrospect, it was an honorable goal and one that I would surely continue to pursue - were I the webmaster of Mahatma Ghandi’s website. However, this is my private blog. So, while I welcome input and will continue to welcome criticisms, complaints, or calls for Character X’s return, I won’t be quite so forgiving of surly missives or blanket show-bashing. If that’s the way you want to go, then I invite you to limit your comments to dedicated forums where your opinions can be shared with like-minded individuals…and absolutely no one else.

4. Be more reckless: Repercussions are for losers.

5. Be more camera-ready: I can’t help but think that if I’d adopted this resolution a little earlier, I could snapped that pic of Fondy losing her shoe in the mud last week.

Watch out Joe, because I'm gonna rip-off your ideas! Screw everyone who stands in my way, for they all deserve my vengeance!!

Ahem...moving on. Also included is a less-than-glowing food review, and this following clarification on the glorious spoiler poem:

In response to some of the comments on yesterday’s poem, I would like to emphasize one passage in particular:

“So here is this year’s abstruse composition,
Designed for you fans who possess the volition,
To examine and study its cryptic contents,
In a bid to unearth hints to future events.”

In other words, all of the clues refer to unaired episodes. Each line of rhyme, more or less, hints at one upcoming episode, covering the back half of season 4 and into season 5. And to those who complain that the clues are too vague - they’re a lot more specific than they appear. Also, as much as I appreciate all of the guesswork, I will not be commenting on your various theories (as admittedly brilliant as some of them may be) until after the cryptically-alluded to episode has aired.

...Followed by some upcoming events:

Speaking of which - Okay, as I’m sure you’re all aware, the back half of Atlantis’s fourth season kicks off this Friday on SciFi with Be All My Sins Remember’d. Well, I exchanged emails with Marty G. and, despite being in vacation mode, he has expressed a willingness to do a post-episode guest Q&A for this blog. So, if you’re interested in finding out what the hell Martin was thinking when he wrote the episode, get your questions in on Saturday and he‘ll, hopefully, get back to us in a timely manner.

...And more clarification:

Finally, a note to all of you leaving comments. Although I read all your posts before approving (or casting them down to the fiery pits of internet Hell), when it comes time for me to do the mailbag, I only reference the most recent questions (unless I missed a mailbag in which case I will go back and review the questions missed). So, if you want your question answered (or considered for a proper answering), please make sure to post in the most recent blog entry.

Questions:

PG15 writes: “Do you ever talk to the directors about what you envisioned the shot to be, or do you just let them do their own thing?”

Answer: Unless it’s crucial to the story, we have confidence in our directors and pretty much allow them free rein.

Thronyrose writes: “Are there any ideas or plans being tossed about about doing an AU episode next season?”

Answer: In fact, such an idea was tossed about in early November, yes.

Thornyrose also writes: “And are we going to see any major changes in the relationship between the Atlantis expidition and Earth? More specifically are we going to see any Earth/US politics affect the mission’s status?”

Answer: Hmmm. Yes. This possibility was also discussed.

PG15 also writes: “Atlantis’s usual ~0.3-0.4 million viewer increases after DVR is factored is is far below the top DVRed shows. So…what’s with the discrepancy there?”

Answer: It depends who you talk to and what research you happen to be referencing. It can be very frustrating at times because, clearly, the fast-developing technology is rapidly outpacing the industry.

Elizabeth writes: “Did the deleted scenes from Trio make it onto the deleted scenes special feature on the season four DVD?”

Answer: I’m not sure there were any whole deleted scenes or significant cuts in Trio that warranted a special feature appearance.

Emily writes: “Let’s say you’re shot with a zat (if it makes you feel more comfortable, imagine it’s me, not you). How much time must pass before it’s safe to be zatted again without being killed by it?”

Answer: Good question. Thinking back, I can’t recall if it has ever been established.

Linzi writes: “I was also wondering if Joe F. is going to direct in season 5…”

Answer: There are no plans to have any of the actors direct in season 5.

SamJack Shipper writes: “I have a question about Continuum do Jack & Sam have any emotional moments with each other?”

Answer: If you mean emotional in the way I think you mean, then no.

suspicious writes: “Could this entire Joe persona be a promotional constuct to promote controversy and interest in SGA? […] Have you hired actors and actresses to play your “mother” and “Fondy” for your photos? And hired others to play your pups? Come clean please, enquiring minds want to know!”

Answer: I can assure you that it’s all real. With the exception of the role of my French bulldog Lulu which is actually played by a very talented boxer named Mutton. Also, for the purposes of this blog, I am portrayed by Armand Assante.

Not Stargate related, but how can I NOT leave it in?!

(Damn, now I have to go to a second page to access this zuz-made smilie on my Photobucket account!)