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    #61
    Atlantis dials in...the rotting, matted hair, maggot infested corpse of Janet Fraser appears on screen, she is back from the dead...

    Fraiser:"My name is Janet and I remember everything*...my zombies and I have wiped out this galaxy and we're coming for you - Colonel Sheppherd. You should have been watching my back, but instead you were gawking at that cute new Lieutenant that was on the mission. Now you're going to die...I'm one mighty pissed b***h"
    Sheppherd: I guess somebody got up on the wrong side of the grave today...How about if I set you up with my hairdresser, you do look like you've been having a couple of bad hair days...




    *Think Alice from Resident Evil
    Last edited by chyron; 26 November 2006, 03:09 PM.
    "The Clarke Postulate - One's ability to correctly explain advanced theoretical thermodynamics as applied to string theory within a fictional context is directly related to one's ability to cook the perfect lemon chicken with mushrooms in a nice garlic butter sauce. While some use this unexpected correlation as proof of intelligent design, I believe that its all about the person's choice of mushrooms.

    I also believe that there is a tear developing in the space-time continuum which if left uncheck will allow Microsoft to become a world power. I suspect that unless we all download Firefox 3 on the same day, thus sealing the tear, that life as we know it may be over and children will have their teddy bears and blankets ripped mercilessly from their arms.

    Comment

      #62
      How do you follow something like that up its hillarious.

      GWRPG CHARACTERS

      Comment

        #63
        like this....

        *on screen is a naked Sam*

        Sam: the president has outlawed clothes... from now on, when you're on Earth you have to walk around naked.
        McKay:-to weir- In the best interest of the male species, I request that Sheppard not be allowed to return to Earth.
        Weir: Request denied.
        McKay: then I request to be sent to Earth immediately.
        Sam & Weir: Request denied!!!!!!!!
        Sheppard: -at the same time- Request granted!!! this should be fun....
        I'm a Slasher. I slash. It's what I do.
        sigpic

        Comment

          #64
          Landry:Dr. Wier, I've been looking over your most recent requisition for supplies...I noticed that Shepherd has increased his C4 request by 1000% - That's an awful lot of explosives, are you planning some sort of covert operation?
          Dr. Weir: I apologize, I thought that I had taken that out of the request
          Landry: How the hell did it get in there in the first place? Was it a typo? Some sort of practical joke?
          Dr. Weir: No, actually that was his original request. I immediatley denied it.
          Landry:Let me guess he slipped it back it. What was his thinking?
          Dr. Weir: He's taken up fishing
          Landry:And that relates how?
          Dr. Weir:Do you really want to know?
          Landry:Go ahead...
          Dr. Weir:He's been fishing using C4...seems he got a bit bored waiting for the fish to bite
          "The Clarke Postulate - One's ability to correctly explain advanced theoretical thermodynamics as applied to string theory within a fictional context is directly related to one's ability to cook the perfect lemon chicken with mushrooms in a nice garlic butter sauce. While some use this unexpected correlation as proof of intelligent design, I believe that its all about the person's choice of mushrooms.

          I also believe that there is a tear developing in the space-time continuum which if left uncheck will allow Microsoft to become a world power. I suspect that unless we all download Firefox 3 on the same day, thus sealing the tear, that life as we know it may be over and children will have their teddy bears and blankets ripped mercilessly from their arms.

          Comment

            #65
            i blame Captain Mal Reynolds for this

            Shep: Yo ho! We live yet?
            Weir: Boy, you better chill yo little ghetto ass down befo i btchslap you. Yo homedog, sup?
            Landry: Hey baby-G. you lookin mighty fine. why don't you come visit the hood sometime?
            Shep: yo nigga! you hittin on my gurl? come on old geezer, it's on!
            Landry: who you callin geezer punk?
            Shep: yous, fat a$$!
            I'm a Slasher. I slash. It's what I do.
            sigpic

            Comment

              #66
              I don't want to hear that Beckett is gone missing.


              Damn it
              sigpic
              Sig by im_meli
              More random Hewlett nerdery on my LJ

              Comment

                #67
                Originally posted by Mercury973 View Post
                I don't want to hear that Beckett is gone missing.


                Damn it
                neither would i, but we like to keep the tone jovial in here as much as possible...
                I'm a Slasher. I slash. It's what I do.
                sigpic

                Comment

                  #68
                  *giggles* now if I could think of somthing witty.....I have a funny Atlantis related story but no witty jokes......

                  Comment

                    #69
                    Landry:Dr. Weir, I'm sorry to have to announce this, but we have to recall Dr. Beckett back to Earth
                    Dr. Weir:*shocked* Why?
                    Dr. Landry:The oversight committee has decided to name him the official SGC Party Host to help liquor up various international leaders to drum up additional support for the SGC and your mission
                    Dr. Weir:Well...I guess that makes sense - no one parties like a Scot.
                    "The Clarke Postulate - One's ability to correctly explain advanced theoretical thermodynamics as applied to string theory within a fictional context is directly related to one's ability to cook the perfect lemon chicken with mushrooms in a nice garlic butter sauce. While some use this unexpected correlation as proof of intelligent design, I believe that its all about the person's choice of mushrooms.

                    I also believe that there is a tear developing in the space-time continuum which if left uncheck will allow Microsoft to become a world power. I suspect that unless we all download Firefox 3 on the same day, thus sealing the tear, that life as we know it may be over and children will have their teddy bears and blankets ripped mercilessly from their arms.

                    Comment

                      #70
                      Originally posted by chyron View Post
                      Landry:Dr. Weir, I'm sorry to have to announce this, but we have to recall Dr. Beckett back to Earth
                      Dr. Weir:*shocked* Why?
                      Dr. Landry:The oversight committee has decided to name him the official SGC Party Host to help liquor up various international leaders to drum up additional support for the SGC and your mission
                      Dr. Weir:Well...I guess that makes sense - no one parties like a Scot.
                      Beckett: I don't wanna go back to Earth!!! I don't wanna!!!!
                      McKay: Why not? You won't have to deal with the Wraith.
                      Beckett: But I'll have to deal with politics!
                      McKay: Alright you have point.....
                      Shep: -just walks in- You lucky bstard!! I hear get to go back to Earth and spend the rest of your days plying diplomats with booze... You know those diplomat chicks get girls gone wild crazy when their drunk off their asses... and I hear some of them on the IOA are pretty hott!
                      Beckett: When do I leave again?
                      I'm a Slasher. I slash. It's what I do.
                      sigpic

                      Comment

                        #71
                        landry: col. shepperd i regret to inform you that you have the following desieses chalmidia, AIDS, hepititis A and B, oh and crabs
                        *shepperd feints*
                        wier: really sir?
                        landry: hold on.... yeah walter? what?!
                        wier: something wrong?
                        landry: it seems theres been a mistake, i read the list of what he doesnt have, you should tell him
                        wier: oh i will, ill just wait a few weeks.....
                        sigpic

                        I'm not dead. Yet.

                        Comment

                          #72
                          Originally posted by susanne View Post
                          landry: col. shepperd i regret to inform you that you have the following desieses chalmidia, AIDS, hepititis A and B, oh and crabs
                          *shepperd feints*
                          wier: really sir?
                          landry: hold on.... yeah walter? what?!
                          wier: something wrong?
                          landry: it seems theres been a mistake, i read the list of what he doesnt have, you should tell him
                          wier: oh i will, ill just wait a few weeks.....
                          Sheppherd (the next day): Well, at least I don't have lice.
                          "The Clarke Postulate - One's ability to correctly explain advanced theoretical thermodynamics as applied to string theory within a fictional context is directly related to one's ability to cook the perfect lemon chicken with mushrooms in a nice garlic butter sauce. While some use this unexpected correlation as proof of intelligent design, I believe that its all about the person's choice of mushrooms.

                          I also believe that there is a tear developing in the space-time continuum which if left uncheck will allow Microsoft to become a world power. I suspect that unless we all download Firefox 3 on the same day, thus sealing the tear, that life as we know it may be over and children will have their teddy bears and blankets ripped mercilessly from their arms.

                          Comment

                            #73
                            Originally posted by susanne View Post
                            landry: col. shepperd i regret to inform you that you have the following desieses chalmidia, AIDS, hepititis A and B, oh and crabs
                            *shepperd feints*
                            wier: really sir?
                            landry: hold on.... yeah walter? what?!
                            wier: something wrong?
                            landry: it seems theres been a mistake, i read the list of what he doesnt have, you should tell him
                            wier: oh i will, ill just wait a few weeks.....
                            Sheppherd (the next day): Well, at least I don't have lice.
                            "The Clarke Postulate - One's ability to correctly explain advanced theoretical thermodynamics as applied to string theory within a fictional context is directly related to one's ability to cook the perfect lemon chicken with mushrooms in a nice garlic butter sauce. While some use this unexpected correlation as proof of intelligent design, I believe that its all about the person's choice of mushrooms.

                            I also believe that there is a tear developing in the space-time continuum which if left uncheck will allow Microsoft to become a world power. I suspect that unless we all download Firefox 3 on the same day, thus sealing the tear, that life as we know it may be over and children will have their teddy bears and blankets ripped mercilessly from their arms.

                            Comment

                              #74
                              Weir: Attention, attention. This is Doctor Weir. Would the pilot of Jumper One please report to the hanger deck. You left the lights on.

                              Comment

                                #75
                                It looks like the Gao'uld have taken the Wraith as hosts and then the Ori came along and made them all Priors. Oh and they seem especially pissed at Sheppard for some reason. Something to do with him having cooler hair.
                                sigpic

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