Originally posted by ChocolateLovingEntity
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Things You Wouldn't Want To Hear in the Tardis or in the Torchwood Hub
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And she's tame?
So back to the fun...
Jack: Hello...
Doctor: Stop flirting!!!
Jack: I'm not flirting!!!
Doctor: Yes you are!!!
Jack: What makes you say that!?
Doctor: Saying hello is flirting to you.
Jack: I'm talking to Donna...
Doctor: Oh...
(Hence, the beginning and ending to Donna bashing today)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChocolateLovingEntity
Tardis flying through space
Donna's been playing in the wardrobe and found a tight red dress to match her hair.
Donna: "Doctor"
Doctor: "mumble mumble" head burried in Tardis guts as he works on its innards. "Yes Donna, mumble mumble"
Donna: "Oi!! Doctor" Doctor raises head
Donna: "Does my bum look big in this?" Doctor frowns and says nothing"
Sudden wooshy sounds and Jack materialises
Jack: "Well hello there....." as he checks out Donna
Doctor: "Oi you stop flirting"
Big whooshy sound Donna and Jack vanish
Wooshy sounds as Donna reeappears
Donna: "sigh" straightens hair
Donna: "OI Doctor where's the nursery?"
Doctor: "Oh no!!!!" slaps head and frowns.
Doctor: "Ok down the stairs two floors down past the bins two more floors down
and two doors away from the spa bath"
Originally posted by ChocolateLovingEntity View Post
9 Months Later
Donna: "Doctor"
Doctor: "Yes"
Donna: sobs "Jack's run off with Owen" sob "and he wants custody of the
baby" sob "we named it Tara in honour of the Tardis since that's where he
picked me up from" sob
Doctor: "Oh that's fine whatever"
Donna: screams "Oi you never care, you never listen" throws stuff around the console room"
Doctor: "If it makes you happy I'll drop you off at Torchwood"
Donna: "Oi yep"
Wooshy sounds as the TARDIS lands
Donna runs out the Tardis into Torchwood with a big shiny axe
The city of New New York Billions Of Years In The Future Or thereabouts
Doctor: "Hello old friend"
Face of Boe: "Hello friend"
Doctor: "What is it"
Face of Boe: "You remember that time Donna ran into Torchwood wiht an axe?"
Doctor: "Yes friend"
Face of Boe: "well guess you know it's me Jack?"
Doctor: slaps his head "Oh doh,. and here I was thinking you were bullsh*tt*ng me"
fade to black...Last edited by Coco Pops; 04 April 2008, 09:03 PM.Go home aliens, go home!!!!
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DOCTOR: "Jack? What have you been doing to my hand that it's all gooey?
JACK: "He, he, he."
TOSH: "Owen, what are you doing!"
OWEN: "Well, it's not like I need them. Why can't I remove my organs and use my chest cavity to carry a concealed weapon?"
JACK: "Um, Ianto? Surprise."
IANTO: "Jack, why didn't you tell me 51st century men could get pregnant?"sigpic
Doctor Who and Top Gear
The only thing better would be if I won the lottery.
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Originally posted by Allestian View PostIanto: Jack, I know that you like me but is the growling necessary?
(From the other side of the Hub)
Jack: What d'ya say!?
sigpic
Doctor Who and Top Gear
The only thing better would be if I won the lottery.
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Originally posted by Allestian View PostCannot believe I'm going to write this...
Spoiler:Jack: That's my job!!!
mental green
Jack: "Don't worry Ianto, I'll save you!"
*Da-da-da-dahhhhhhhhhhhhhh*
Ianto: "Oh, my hero." *swoon*sigpic
Doctor Who and Top Gear
The only thing better would be if I won the lottery.
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Spoiler:Jack: *whimper, iz hard* "Oh I love a man who can dish out some punishment."
OWEN: "Oh my god, please not in the HUB. Some of us are trying to work, here."
GWEN: "Mmmh, yes. I can see that issue of Playboy is taking all your concentration."
OWEN: "F*** off!"
GWEN: "I have Rhys for that, thank you very much."
TOSH: "I'm not listening, la, la, la, la, la, la."sigpic
Doctor Who and Top Gear
The only thing better would be if I won the lottery.
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Originally posted by JJSNgadget View PostSpoiler:Jack: *whimper, iz hard* "Oh I love a man who can dish out some punishment."
OWEN: "Oh my god, please not in the HUB. Some of us are trying to work, here."
GWEN: "Mmmh, yes. I can see that issue of Playboy is taking all your concentration."
OWEN: "F*** off!"
GWEN: "I have Rhys for that, thank you very much."
TOSH: "I'm not listening, la, la, la, la, la, la."
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Originally posted by JJSNgadget View PostGWEN: "Chewing gum helps me think."
TOSH: "Sweetie, you're wasting your gum!"
JACK: "You do an eclectic celebration of the dance! You do Fosse, Fosse, Fosse! You do Martha Graham, Martha Graham, Martha Graham! Or Twyla, Twyla, Twyla! Or Michael Kidd, Michael Kidd, Michael Kidd, Michael Kidd! Or Madonna, Madonna, Madonna!... but you keep it all inside. "
GWEN: "So, how did you and Lisa meet."
IANTO: "I thought I was gonna have a heart attack. I mean, I walk in the door and there's a woman in my bed!"
LISA: "I paid the doorman twenty dollars - twenty dollars, in those days!"
IANTO: "Oh, God. And I thought, "what the hell, let's try it once with a woman and see what those straight guys are raving about.""
OWEN: "Don't give me that tone!"
JACK: "What tone?"
OWEN: "That sarcastic contemptuous tone that means you know everything because you're a man, and I know nothing because I'm a woman."
JACK: "You're not a woman."
OWEN: "Oh, you 8@st@rd!"
Originally posted by Allestian View PostCannot believe I'm going to write this...
Spoiler:Jack: That's my job!!!
sigpic
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Jack: What are you giving him drugs for? What the hell are Pirin tablets?
Owen: It's aspirin with the "A" and the "S" scraped off.
Jack: My God, what a brilliant idea!
Owen: I know.
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Jack: Ianto, you're gonna have to get yourself a uniform and dress like a butler.
Ianto: No! I'm gonna look like a f*g!
Jack: Maybe, but you'll look like a f*g in a uniform.
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Ianto: Oh god, I pierced the toast!
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I just HAD to continue with The Birdcage! Aaaand maybe you can guest what this lot is from!
Jack: I'm dead. I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I died, I'm dead.
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Owen: Bubbles. Bubbles. My bubbles.
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Jack: Who's with me?
Ianto: I.
Gwen: I.
Toshiko: I.
Owen: I think you're nuts.sigpic
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