The Last Word

[Bagpuss]

Who's this FBH? Far as I know,I'm FHB and yes I still hold TLW!
Actually I'm holding her v. gently: all this Universe hopping has played sheer havoc with her digestion on top of last night's excesses. Poor little TLW!

Sorry CW.No idea what you've got but judging from the hangover,looks like I have the real TLW.(No idea how to cure her,any ideas?)

[DJFavorite]

DJF, having disappeared over the weekend, shows up on the scene. She sees FHB trying to nurse TLW back to perfect health, and seeing her difficulty, offers to help. DJF pulls out her miracle cure and heals TLW. FHB, being grateful, realizes that TLW is better off under the care of DJF and hands it over.

[bcmilco]

DJF then takes TLW to BCM because, if anyone can take care of a sick TLW it's him... So BCM takes off with TLW to make it feel better. =P

[Champos]

The thing is, you're all referring to TLW as being female, which it blatantly isn't (it transcends our petty imaginings of gender). Realising something's wrong here, Champos checks back along the path and concludes that someone along the way someone must have picked up a fake TLW (we'll call it TLW2). Champos wanders along the path aimlessly and just-so happens to come across the real TLW. He picks it up, checks it is indeed the correct TLW, and they head off together for a curry.

[Champos]

I'm hurt! Really, very, very hurt. First off I'm accused of drinking Kingfisher beer (!), then of having a green salad! I have to say that I really am shocked by your perception of me. Now, if you'd said you'd drugged my pint of, I don't know, Carling Extra Cold maybe, or even Tsing Tao, and that I was snoring into my medium/well-done steak, or my Madras curry, maybe then I'd be happy. As it is I'm too hurt even to bother taking back TLW. I suggest you go up to your room and think about what you've done.

[Bagpuss]

Sheeeeeesh! I was only trying to keep you healthy with the salad !

As for the beer,let's substitute your fave instead? Quite partial to a drop of Carling myself- Cheers!

OK,I've thought about "What I've Done". Sorry,my Bagpuss persona still regrets nothing!(What do you expect from a cat?)

Can I come downstairs now? TLW says Hi and thanks for the gentlemanly treatment.......

[Crazedwraith]

The thing is, you're all referring to TLW as being female, which it blatantly isn't (it transcends our petty imaginings of gender). /

You mean sex not gender. Gender means if your behavour is masculine or feminie where as sex is physically what kind reproductive organs you have.

BTW FHB, I thikn you'll find If you look carefully at my post i say FHB not FBH but in the intrest of fair play i wont take TLW back on those grounds. I'll just shoot you now and take by force.

*shoots FHB in the kneecaps with a FN P-90 and runs off with TLW*

[SeaBee]

Having spotted the cheating heart that is CW ( I also saw the FBH) shoot the food provider that is FHB, SB goes red mist and attacks.


AAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!!!!!!

*SNARL!!! FOAM!!! FROTH!!!*

Under the vicious attack CW drops the gun, which SB eats, and TLW, which SB grabs.

[Crazedwraith]

luckily in the few moments he had TLW, CW nish'ta-ed it and gave it a zat, thus TLW is CW's fanatical servant, TLW zats SB and returns to its rightful lord and God CW.

[Bagpuss]

Only for Tok'Ra FHB to electronically zap CW and TLW with Carter's old ear gadgets (from the Seth Ep ).Just slunk up and popped 'em in,then zatted CW.

FHB pockets the suddenly docile TLW,leaves CW a "Things not to try on slinky SG1 fans" Manual and a Strawberry pie,and sets off on her merry way again.
With the Zat gun just in case of attack from other TLW predators!

FH Bagpuss is getting nasty again.
Ggrrrrrrr!

[DJFavorite]

As FHB is traveling on her merry way, she comes across DJF. They greet each other happily, as it has been a week or two since they last visited. They sit down and chat and as FHB is distracted in conversation, DJF sneaks TLW. They say their goodbyes and head off for another adventure (down different roads....)

[Bagpuss]

FHB is really happy to have met up again with DJF!(Ah,TLP memories..Wow!What a marathon and so much fun!! )

After a few minutes,lost in fond remembrance,FHB's TLW Absence Monitor(T.M) starts bleeping.OMG! DJF swiped the TLW! Again.

Trundling off after DJF,at top speed,(NOT pretty ),FHB eventually catches up with DJF.Zats her, reclaims TLW and scoots away ..feeling v. guilty for rendering DJF comatose by the roadside.........still she might cheer up when she wakes up to find a small pile of Antsy Cup-Cakes by her side!

[DJFavorite]

Yummmmmmm, those cupcakes were great!!! And oh the memories (btw, we missed you at the end, FHB).

After DJF finishes eating and has tons of energy (ants do that you know ) she tracks down FHB (who's scooter has broken down).

DJF give FHB a stern lecture about zating others and takes TLW as punishment. DJF then takes off as fast as she can run........

[Bagpuss]

FHB isn't too worried about the scooter as it was "Acquired" anyway.FHB is worried about TLW,though as it's way past the little dear's bed time......still,
she still has the tracking device,so away she goes again!

Attracted by the crabby bawling of TLW, FHB arrives to find DJF about to go bananas at the racket!

FHB already knows TLW's little bad habits so she volunteers to calm things down. Breaking out the Bailey's, FHB doses the "Lush" (!) TLW and noticing that DJF seems to have relaxed,as soon as the noise stopped,FHB quietly tiptoes off into the night with the TLW in tow.
.............................................................................

*Afraid I missed the "End" of TLP on Delphi as our comp decided to crash.Got it repaired and safely back on May 8.What a pain! However,I've gone back to the old forum to read all the stuff I missed and had great fun ! At least Tame
got the real Last Post as a consolation for missing # 1000 .Drat the "Sly-Boy" BCM! **

[TameFarrar]

*Afraid I missed the "End" of TLP on Delphi as our comp decided to crash.Got it repaired and safely back on May 8.What a pain! However,I've gone back to the old forum to read all the stuff I missed and had great fun ! At least Tame
got the real Last Post as a consolation for missing # 1000 .Drat the "Sly-Boy" BCM! **

Just popping in to *THANK YOU* for noticing that My Friend....nursing a headache myself...so leaving TLW in your capable hands....although I will be swiping one of those cupcakes....kind of got hooked on those Glad you are back and the comp is hale and healthy!!!