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Current US Military Intelligence on Father Christmas' Status and Progress

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    #1

    Current US Military Intelligence on Father Christmas' Status and Progress

    Yes, that's right - Straight out of Cheyenne Mountain, NORAD *cough* Stargate Command *cough* is providing the world with real time intelligence on Father Christmas' status and progress and he undertakes the most phenomenal of all sorties across the globe tonight. Faster than the most cutting edge military jet fighter, and carrying more cargo than a Hercules C-130J Transport aircraft. Saint Nicholas is, as of 2200hrs GMT, currently over Port Elizabeth, South Africa, according to satellite imagery that is tracking his every move, ensuring a safe and trouble free night time operation for the jolly individual.

    Anyone interested in keeping an eye on Father Christmas' progress can view the latest intelligence right here; http://www.noradsanta.org courtesy of the United States Air Force (probably with RAF support of course ). In addition, US satellites have also picked up imagery of St Nick navigating national landmarks, and even making a stop at the International Space Station!

    Merry Christmas All!


    "Five Rounds Rapid"

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    #2
    I see.... so now would be a good time for Putin to attack!

    .... OI VLADIMIR..... YOUR UP!
    A word of advice... there are creatures that live between this dimension and the next, fiendish creatures that feast on the suffering of an entire world to satiate their eternal hunger. Support the Gateworld Cantina or suffer the fate of all who fall into the clutches of the 'Eladrith Ynneas'

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      #3
      *gets all excited* He's headed my way!
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        #4
        He's on his way folks! And currently over Zimbabwe!


        "Five Rounds Rapid"

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          #5
          ho ho ho

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            #6
            you know things are getting bad when the govermeant implanted a GPS chip on santa's slay. doesn't anyone have the right to anonymous
            https://twitter.com/#!/Solar_wind84

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              #7
              Originally posted by Pharaoh Atem View Post
              you know things are getting bad when the govermeant implanted a GPS chip on santa's slay. doesn't anyone have the right to anonymous
              It's a sub claus in the Patriot Act (geddit? Sub claus? clause? Oh I'm funny!) that allows the US government to monitor Father Christmas' at all times in the interests of Homeland security during this uncertain period of time with the risk of terrorist action.


              "Five Rounds Rapid"

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                #8
                Originally posted by Pharaoh Atem View Post
                you know things are getting bad when the govermeant implanted a GPS chip on santa's slay. doesn't anyone have the right to anonymous
                They don't need to. We track him like we would any other large flying object, its rather easy.
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                In Islamofascist Afghanistan, pain experiences you!
                "The faster you finish the fight, the less shot you will get." ~ AFSOC MOUT Instructor

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                  #9
                  Originally posted by Coela Bellatore View Post
                  They don't need to. We track him like we would any other large flying object, its rather easy.
                  I dunno... if your guys are anything like ours they'd probably dismiss Santa's RADAR image as an error simply because he wasn't behaving like a contemporary aircraft.
                  Last edited by Flyboy; 26 December 2009, 09:52 AM.


                  "Five Rounds Rapid"

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                    #10
                    Originally posted by Coela Bellatore View Post
                    They don't need to. We track him like we would any other large flying object, its rather easy.
                    tell that to pearl harbor
                    https://twitter.com/#!/Solar_wind84

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