Joseph Mallozzi's Blog! (SPOILERS For All SG Shows and Dark Matter)

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May 29, 2014

Photo: Full and empty glasses


Last blog entry, in compiling my list of crazy-but-true job interview questions, I failed to include one that should have made the list. Fortunately, my former Executive Producer Assistant, Trevor, was kind enough to remind me:

“Are you comfortable occasionally draining my pet baboon’s anal glands?” – Joe Mallozzi

To be honest, it wasn’t a question posited to test his lateral thinking. I just honestly wanted to know. Happily, Trevor was okay with it and, based on his response, got the job. I, on the other hand, sadly, never got my baboon who was lost in transit from Chad (both the place and the guy who took my order). I can’t help but think that, somewhere out there, some other family is enjoying Cedrick Pinkbottom III’s company.

Thanks to everyone who took the time to answer yesterday’s job interview questions. There are no right answers, just bad ones that don’t get you hired.

The following ten questions, on the other hand, DO have right answers. But you won’t get them until tomorrow’s blog entry (so pray I survive the night or you’ll never know).

Remember to think outside the box!

1. What can you put in a wooden box that would make it lighter? The more of them you put in the lighter it becomes, yet the box stays empty.

2. Which side of a cat contains the most hair?

3. Why can’t a man living in Canterbury be buried west of the River Stour?

4. Is it legal for a man to marry his widow’s sister?

5. If you drove a coach leaving Canterbury with 35 passengers, dropped off 6 and picked up 2 at Faversham, picked up 9 more at Sittingbourne, dropped off 3 at Chatham, and then drove on to arrive in London 40 minutes later, what colour are the driver’s eyes?

6. A window cleaner is cleaning the windows on the 25th floor of a skyscraper, when he slips and falls. He is not wearing a safety harness and nothing slows his fall, yet he suffered no injuries. Explain.

7. John’s mother has 3 children, one is named April, one is named May. What is the third one named?

8. A man and his son were in a car crash. The father was killed and the son was taken to hospital with serious injuries. The examining doctor exclaims: “But, this is my son!”.
How can this be?

9. You have to choose between three rooms.
The first is full of raging fires
The second is full of tigers that haven’t eaten in 3 years.
The third is full of assassins with loaded machine guns.
Which room should you choose?

10. Three of the glasses below are filled with orange juice and the other three are empty. By moving just one glass, can you arrange the glasses so that the full and empty glasses alternate?

Answers tomorrow!

[Source: The University of Kent].

[thekillman]

1: fire
2: the outside
3: the river runs west-east (or vice versa)
4: yes ?
5: the color of my eyes for i am the driver
6: he stands on a plateau so doesnt fall 25 floors
7: john
8: doctor is also the term for a female doctor
9: the second, tigers would be dead by then
10: pour the middle full glass into the middle empty glass

[Gatefan1976]

1: fire
2: the outside
3: the river runs west-east (or vice versa)
4: yes ?
5: the color of my eyes for i am the driver
6: he stands on a plateau so doesnt fall 25 floors
7: john
8: doctor is also the term for a female doctor
9: the second, tigers would be dead by then
10: pour the middle full glass into the middle empty glass

3: He is ALIVE, you don't bury the living
4: If the woman is a widow, the dude is dead, legality is hardly an issue
6: He is on the inside of the building

[thekillman]

3: He is ALIVE, you don't bury the living
4: If the woman is a widow, the dude is dead, legality is hardly an issue
6: He is on the inside of the building

ah thanks. the other ones are very old and i've seen them all over the place, but 3,4 and 6 i haven't seen before. Though technically my answers are right (well except 4, but i misread it...)

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May 30, 2014


Wait. What trilogy? Oh, THIS trilogy: http://www.gateworld.net/news/2014/0...movie-trilogy/

Yep, I’d heard rumblings – and they’ve finally been confirmed. 20 years after the original movie, Devlin and Emmerich will be rebooting Stargate for the big screen.

I continue to be amazed by the franchise’s staying power and continuing evolution, from a Devlin-Emmerich feature film that grossed 200 million to a television juggernaut that, under the stewardship of Brad Wright and Robert Cooper, helped establish SyFy, built MGM’s television division, and generated close to a billion dollars in revenue for the studio, and now back to the big screen.

Last year, I wrote an entry about the future of Stargate, https://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com...ther-stargate/, outlining my take on the various possible scenarios.

My conclusion? At the end of the day, it all comes down to one thing: Pleasing the fans – new fans AND established fans alike. [P.S. Wouldn't a brief cameo by Samantha Carter or Rodney McKay or Dr. Nicholas Rush be truly awesome?].

Everything (not that old) is new again! I look forward to seeing the gate in action once more. Very exciting!

I notice fandom response has been mixed. What do you all think?

Well, thanks to everyone who took the time to take yesterday’s lateral thinking quiz. You all did very well. In fact, much better than I did. Check out all the answers, and more brainteasing questions, here: http://www.kent.ac.uk/careers/sk/lateral.htm

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May 31, 2014

Photos: Summer salad, pea soup, onion pie, octopus, dinner at Yuji’s, Ollie, Akemi, dogs


“I ate like a garbage box.” – Akemi, the other day, after a particularly filling meal. She has a way with words, no?

These are some of the inspired dishes she’s been packing away...

Last night, we elected to take a break from the kitchen and headed over to our favorite Japanese restaurant: Yuji’s (2083 Alma St. Vancouver). Some of the highlights of our meal...

We were driving back home when we spotted a dog walking around by his lonesome. I slowed down and we watched him sniff around, trot across the street, sniff around some more. There was no owner in sight. So, I pulled over and we approached the handsome fellow who turned out to be incredibly friendly. I checked his collar and, fortunately, he had a tag, a name (Ollie!), and a phone number. I called but got an answering machine, so I left a message and was just loading him into the backseat of my car (Ollie seemed really eager to go for a ride) when my cell phone rang. It was the owner. She was in Vietnam! She thanked me for corralling her dog and gave me her address so I could drop him off. Her husband was home. Or so she assumed because when we went over, no one answered the door. We ended up bringing Ollie back home - our dogs weren’t quite as warmly receptive as we were – and ended up walking him back to his place once the owner’s son got in touch. Such a great a walker. He puts my gang to shame.

Speaking of houseguests, tomorrow we say goodbye to Judd after ten happy days. Akemi will miss him. And he’ll miss our backyard...

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June 1, 2014

Photos: Game of Thrones


10. Brienne of Tarth

I love the fact that she’s an atypical heroine and I find her sense of honor and principled loyalty so gosh darn endearing.

9. Asha Greyjoy

Equally atypical is the ass-kicking Asha. Love her swagger and no-bull**** attitude.

8. Jonah Mormont

Such a rich, textured and, ultimately, tragic character.

7. Cersei Lannister

Sure, I love to hate her but, at the same time, I understand and even sympathize with her desire to do what’s best for her family. After all, it always comes down family.

6. Jaime Lannister

You’d think it would be hard to sympathize with a character who, in his very introduction, tries to kill a child who stumbles across his incestuous secret rendezvous with his sister – and yet, he’s a charmer.

5. Peter Baelish (Littlefinger)

The enemy of your enemy is your friend. Usually. But I wouldn’t count on it if said frenemy is Littlefinger. The ultimate opportunist. It’s a joy to watch him “play the angles”.

4. Oberon Nymeros Martell (The Red Viper)

A latecomer to the action (And, yes, I’ve read the books) who has become a fast favorite for his contrasting roguishness and noble spirit.

3. Varys (The Spider)

I can’t help but admire the Lord of Whispers and his ability to maneuver and maintain his position within the court. Knowledge IS power.

2. Bronn

A mercenary through and through and yet he is capable of genuine affection, loyalty, and friendship. But of course not at the risk of his own life.

1. Tyrion Lannister

I loved the character in the books and love him even more on the television series. Cynical, rude, and debauched and yet, at the same time, humorous, considerate and vulnerable.

Honorable mentions: Arya Stark, Khal Drogo, Sandor Clegane (The Hound), Margaery Tyrell.

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June 2, 2014

Photo: Evening’s Empire by Paul McAuley


“In the far future, a young man stands on a barren asteroid. His ship has been stolen, his family kidnapped or worse, and all he has on his side is a semi-intelligent spacesuit. The only member of the crew to escape, Hari has barely been off his ship before. It was his birthplace, his home and his future. He’s going to get it back. “

It certainly sounds like a focused, revenge-fueled romp but, in reality, Evening’s Empires is actually a sweeping, cerebral tale of betrayal, vengeance, and, surprisingly, family. It’s an ambitious and intelligent novel that is both hard SF and space opera although, to be perfectly honest, it took a while for the story to really capture my interest. For the first fifty pages or so, I was utterly baffled, even frustrated, by the overwhelming denseness of the shifting social landscapes and political and religious paradigms.

The book is incredibly rich in its grand scope world galaxy-building and much of the background history, established and developed in the author’s previous books, can be incredibly confusing for the uninitiated. I had to double (and triple) check that Evening’s Empires was, in fact, a standalone novel that didn’t require any knowledge of McAuley’s other works. The various backstory elements are eventually explained, a little too often in the form of mass conversational info dumps but, once I finally had a better understanding of its foundations, the novel became a far more enjoyable read. Still, partway through, when I came across the line “It’s a maze he lost himself in.” I couldn’t help think “There but for the Grace of God went I”.

At the heart of this book is the mystery of “the bright moment”, a simultaneously shared vision, glimpsed by everyone in the solar system, of a man on a bicycle. Our hero, Hari, is raised on a spaceship where his family plays host to a scientist studying “the bright moment”. Then, one day, their ship is hijacked and Hari is forced to flee – with the scientist’s head and the valuable data it contains. Hari plots to retake his ship but, to do so, he must connect with people from his past and peel the onion on a multi-layered mystery involving religious fanatics, shifting alliances, and dangerous clones.

It all makes for a head-spinning tour-de-force that, I suspect, will leave many readers thoroughly amazed by the novel’s depth and breadth while, simultaneously, leaving just as many thoroughly bewildered.

As an added bonus for the well-read SF fan, the book is divided into six parts titled: Childhood’s End, Marooned Off Vespa, The Caves of Steel, Pirates of the Asteroids, The Cold Equations, and Downward to the Earth. I’m not sure if there was more to it than a simple tip of the hat to the golden age classics, but there’s no denying Evening’s Empire has far more in common with the narratively expansive and challenging works of Alastair Reynolds and Iain M. Banks than it does the works of Clarke, Asimov, and Silverberg.

Let’s get the conversation started. What did you all think of Evening’s Empires?

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June 3, 2014

Photos: Game of Thrones


Well, if nothing else, Sunday night’s episode of Game of Thrones (“The Mountain and the Viper”) reaffirmed that old sports adage: “Always play to the whistle.” Having read the book, I saw it coming but, at the same time, I didn’t see it coming.

And so, coming off that shockingly gruesome instalment, I thought it might be nice to follow up my list of My Top 10 Favorite Game of Thrones Characters -

http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/...es-characters/

- with a list of My Top 10 Most Hated Game of Thrones Characters.

And, hey, whaddya know! One character has the distinction of appearing on BOTH lists!

10. Bran Stark

Every time this kid appears onscreen, my eyes glaze over and I redirect my attention to far more interesting pursuits – like surfing the net on my handy iPhone. Something about getting somewhere and visions and a big tree…? I don’t care.

9. Theon Greyjoy

He was weak and pathetic even before he fell into the clutches of Ramsay Snow. Can’t muster much sympathy for a guy who murdered two innocent farm boys. But not Bran Stark.

8. Stannis Baratheon

A dull milksop whose ambitions far surpass his limited skill set. Fortunately for him, he’s got a witch in his corner.

7. Tywin Lannister

Worst Dad Ever!

6. Viserys Targaryen

This petulant whiner’s actually reminded me of someone I know. His “crowning” was well-deserved.

5. Robbin Arryn

Forget those precocious and loveable tykes from the Adam Sandler romcoms; THIS kid is what you can look forward to if you have children.

4. Ramsay Snow

Admit it. You too knew this guy in high school and predicted he would someday end up, in his father’s basement, honing his torture skills.

3. Gregor Clegane (The Mountain)

From an honourable mention position to a Top 5 finisher, all on the strength of a single episode!

2. Cersei Lannister

The only character to make both lists, she is that rare someone I love to hate and, alternately, hate to love.

1. Joffrey Baratheon

Not even death mitigates my intense dislike for the sadistic little weasel.

Honorable mentions: Lysa Arryn, Roose Bolton, and Walder Frey/Balon Greyjoy (who I keep thinking are the same guy).

Agree? Disagree? Care to weigh on last Sunday’s episode? The series as a whole?

Thanks to those who took the time to post a comment on this months Book of the Month Club selection, Evening’s Empires. I had a feeling the opinions would be mixed.

Anything else on your mind? Do tell.

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June 4, 2014

Video: Game of Thrones fan reaction


Viewer reaction to last Sunday’s episode of Game of Thrones:

Okay, moving on. Finally.

No. Wait. I wanted to add that, having finished Dance with Dragons, I’m struck by the fact that the t.v. show has already caught up with certain storylines in the book series (ie. the Ramsay Snow arc). Either George R. R. Martin has to pick up the pace, or the show may go on a brief, decade-long sabbatical.

It looks like it’s high time for some better-late-than-never spring cleaning! I’m talking a wholesale clear-out at the personal and professional level! Oh, and my garage (anyone interested in some office furniture, filing cabinets, and a cash register?). No, Akemi isn’t going anywhere (unless she’s willing to give up her mapo tofu recipe). But other many other major changes to come (No, the dogs aren’t going anywhere either).

Today was a total write-off. I’ve stalled on page 40 of my new pilot and didn’t get any reading done as I was busy trying to keep this “house of cards” from collapsing.

I’m off to go peruse some budgets. Wish me luck!

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June 5, 2014

Photos: Archie Andrews


Seriously? What the heck is going on here? Last time I read I checked in on the gang from Riverdale, these were the type of shenanigans they were getting into:

And then, somewhere along the line, things took a darker turn for Archie Andrews (or, one could argue, a lighter turn for Frank Castle) and we got this:

Suddenly, our Archie had grown up. Instead of just hanging around Pop Tate’s Pop Shoppe or toying with Betty and Veronica’s emotions, he was suddenly running afoul of crazed, gun-toting vigilantes...

And then, eventually, after 67 years of straddling the fence, Archie finally made up his mind and decided between Betty and Veronica choosing...

The bad girl. So decided – FINALLY – he married Veronica...

Or, wait, maybe it was Betty...

Or both of those stories took place in an alternate universe so he could continue dating both in addition to her -

And her -

And her -

And then cold reality intruded with the passing of longtime high school teacher Miss Grundy -

- who perished from lyme disease after being bitten by a deer tick while out hunting pronghorns at Houston National Forest.

Or wait. Maybe that was a dream. Well, the part about the deer tick. But she DID die (presumably in the same alternate universes where Archie met the Punisher, finally chose Veronica and married both of his high school sweethearts).

Craziness abounds:

http://www.toplessrobot.com/2011/04/...archie_the.php

And then **** REALLY gets real when Jughead’s dead dog returns from the grave, setting off a zombie apocalypse at Riverdale.

And in the presumed final chapter of the life of Archie Andrews, we can finally look forward to the death of the world’s most indecisive teenager:

http://www.archiecomics.com/Blogs/ta...S-IN-JULY.aspx

Apparently he goes hunting for pronghorns at Sam Houston National Forest...

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June 6, 2014

Photos: Zoodles, Akemi, Laxative


Zoodles. That’s what Akemi calls the above-pictured dish. It’s the disrespectful vegan version of spaghetti in which pasta is substituted with zucchini strips, yielding a culinary catastrophe that is both disgusting in appearance AND flavor yet less starchy and calorie-laden. In fairness, that would have also been the case had she substituted shoelaces instead.

My review: “It tastes like dirt.”

Her review: “Why do vegan people lie to me?”

Why? Because they’re evil.

Sadly, Akemi had to fly solo on this one as I opted for the less-healthy salmon burger and roasted broccoli.

Fortunately for her, we had a big lunch today at Fable. Akemi enjoyed her meal but found the air-conditioned room way too cold for her shorts and t-shirt ensemble, so she improvised a shawl using our napkins:

Seriously, I felt like I was out with my kooky aunt, the one who’d go shopping in her bathrobe and slippers.

Yesterday, Akemi was going through the old medicine cabinet, tossing out expired pills belonging to “the former administration”. Every so often, she would present me with a bottle and inquire about its contents. Selenium. Magnesium. Milk thistle. And this -

After I explained what it was – and what it did – she drew the following helpful diagram as a future reminder:

Finally, today Akemi was inquiring about the phrase “born with a silver spoon in their mouth”. She wanted to know: “Why silver and not gold? Gold is better, no?” Well, yes. I didn’t have an answer for her outside of the fact that the alliteration of silver spoon sounds so much nicer. She wondered if there was a similar phrase to suggest someone born to simpler means: “…like born with Mcdonalds plastic spoon in his mouth?”

Hmmm. I don’t know. Doesn’t ring a bell.

Anyone?

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June 7, 2014

Photos: Lunch at Nicli Antica, Cadeaux Bakery, Akemi, Gary, Lulu, selection of chocolates from Beta 5, dinner at Sun Sui Wah, Kathy


Our old friend Gary, aka gforce, is in town for a few days, so we met up for some eats:

Lunch at Nicli Antica (62 E Cordova St, Vancouver) for a parade of pizzas....

Then over to Cadeaux Bakery (172 Powell St, Vancouver) for a selection of sweets...

And, finally, back to our place where Gary met the gang – and hit it off with Lulu...

And, to top things off, Gary was kind enough to gift us a seasonal selection of chocolates from Beta 5 (413 Industrial Ave, Vancouver)...

Tonight, we met up with our friend Kathy, aka Kathode, for dinner at Sun Sui Wah (3888 Main St, Vancouver). When I made the reservations, they neglected to inform me that the main dining room was booked for a wedding reception – so we were shuttled to a tiny adjoining room where we enjoyed our meal, serenaded by 80?s tunes and bad karaoke. On the bright side, Kathy sampled Peking Duck for the first time!

For dessert, we were presented with a special dessert – tapioca pie – compliments of the Manager. I felt bad. I didn’t get him anything.

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June 8, 2014 - Part 1

Photos: Books


Capsule reviews of all the books I read in May…and there were more than a few:

ME BEFORE YOU by Jojo Moyes

An individual with no caregiving experience is hired to look after a wheelchair-bound quadriplegic who has all but given up on life. Eventually, the two overcome their mutual uncertainty to form a bond, experiencing happiness, adventure, and, ultimately, love. This, by the way, is the premise of Intouchables, a great French movie that came out in 2011. It’s also the premise for this maudlin novel released in 2012.

I AM NOT A SERIAL KILLER by Dan Wells

15 year old John Wayne Cleaver is obsessed with serial killers. He is so obsessed, in fact, that he studies them religiously in order to figure out how to avoid becoming one. But when a body turns up and it looks like a serial killer has struck close to him, things become a lot more complicated for John. I LOVED the first 100 pages of this book. It was darkly humorous and set up a great premise that…crashed and burned with the revelation that the murderer is actually a supernatural entity. Huh?? This book had the makings of a ghoulishly clever crime novel and character study but, for some reason, morphs into a silly monster hunt. Hugely disappointing.

THE INVERTED WORLD by Christopher Priest

A city moves along a railroad track in constant, laborious progress, attempting to keep up with something called “the optimum” – or risk losing pace and falling victim to a gravitational field that has warped space and time. This is a truly bizarre work of science fiction that jumps between multiple narrative styles in telling a story that is both grounded in its characters yet intellectually and creatively provocative in its conceit. At times, I felt like I was reading Leigh Brackett’s The Long Tomorrow - on acid.

A FALL OF MOONDUST by Arthur C. Clarke

A cruiser traveling on the lunar surface is lost in The Sea of Thirst, buried deep in the dust. The cruiser’s occupants try to maintain their spirits as a rescue mission is mounted and life support systems begin to fail. A hard SF version of those Irwin Allen disaster features from the 70?s. Classic but staid and, at times, dated and silly.

THE NIGHT CIRCUS by Erin Morgenstern

Against the backdrop of a mysterious circus, two young magicians must square off in an age-old duel fueled by the rivalry of their respective fathers. But matters are complicated by romantic entanglements. A good book certain to appeal to fans of the genre, but I inevitably find magic-themed stories incredibly frustrating. Unlike, say, SF that sets down technological parameters as to what can and cannot be achieved, in magic-based narratives all bets are off. ****s happens, people die and then, ultimately, it’s all upended because…magic! Ho hum.

THE LIONS OF AL-RASSANby Guy Gavriel Kay

Moorish Spain (or a fictional version thereof) is the backdrop of this sweeping historical fantasy involving sieges, warfare, diabolical plots, courtly intrigue, crosses, double-crosses, friendship, and romance. At heart of it all are three protagonists whose backgrounds and alliances lead them on intersecting paths both heroic and tragic. Brilliant world-building and wonderfully nuanced characters. My introduction to the works of author Guy Gavriel Kay novel. Highly recommended.

THE BRIEF AND FRIGHTENING REIGN OF PHIL by George Saunders

A nonsense novella about the fictitious principalities of Inner and Outer Horner. It’s a silly and ultimately unsatisfying political and social satire that feels like it was written over the course of a drink-fueled evening.

THE WALL OF THE SKY, THE WALL OF THE EYE by Jonathan Lethem

I was looking forward to this one but was left disappointed by a collection of SF-themed stories containing some interesting ideas but not much in the way of cohesive, self-contained narratives.

THE SHINING GIRLS by Lauren Beukes

A serial killer travels through time, dispatching of his victims: young women he refers to as “shining girls”. Finally, a time travel novel that makes sense. Sort of. An interesting premise and no real faults in time travel logic – but no real answers either. Why is this house a time machine? What motivates the serial killer to murder these women? What makes them “shine”? They’re developing this book for television so maybe the t.v. series will have the answers. But probably not.

THE ROAD TO RECKONING by Robert Lautner

You can almost smell the gun smoke, sweat, and campfire in this gritty Western character piece about a young boy, orphaned after his father’s murder, who enlists the help of an ornery bastard to get him home. Smart and surprisingly absorbing. A great read.

SALVATION OF A SAINT by Keigo Higashino

I went in expecting a page-turning crime thriller but ended up with an awkward and plodding mystery that isn’t really a mystery at all because we know whodunit from the start. The body of the book is just an extended conversation of deduction. Unlike the author’s previous novel, The Devotion of Suspect X, there’s little in the way of actual suspense or narrative build. In the end, when all is revealed, the details of the murder are so implausible they’re almost laughable. I suspect that this novel may have also suffered from the quality of its translation.

PERFUME by Patrick Susskind

In 18th century France, a child is born without scent. Because of this strange, physiological trait, he grows up a social pariah. But, eventually, he finds his calling – first as a brilliant perfumer, and later as a diabolical serial killer who uses scent to manipulate those around him. This book has all the makings of a unique, engaging novel but its promise is undone by a thoroughly detestable protagonist. I’m not saying that our serial-killing main character must necessarily possess traits that make him sympathetic to the reader (a la Dexter or Hannibal Lecter), but it would be nice to get inside his head at some point and learn a little about him. Instead, it’s all surface. The corpses pile up. Our a creepy freak of a protagonist bemoans his scentless genitals. And it all culminates in one of the stupidest endings ever committed to print.

Would have made a fine short story.

SCHRODER by Amity Gaige

In the heat of a custody battle, a desperate father takes his daughter on an ill-advised extended road trip. It’s one of several big errors in judgement that lead our protagonist down an inevitably heartbreaking path. The fairly straightforward premise belies a surprising complexity in this touching and tragic tale. On the surface, not “the type of book” I’d enjoy – but I was thoroughly engrossed.

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June 8, 2014 - Part 2


THE SLAP by Christos Tsiolkas

At a family gathering, a guest slaps a child not his own. A lawsuit and strained relationships ensue in this comprehensive look at the ties that bind one extended family. This book certainly does a masterful job of pushing the reader’s buttons. I’ve heard that many mothers who read the book were outraged and extremely sympathetic to the child and his mother. I, on the other hand, had no sympathy for the spoiled brat and his loopy, smothering mom. In fact, I had little to no sympathy for any of the multitudinous characters who people this novel. They’re all beyond flawed and well into “reprehensible” territory. I should have seen it coming when, only one page in, I was already annoyed with a character who takes advantage of his wife being away by: “not washing or brushing his teeth all weekend.” Come on. Regardless of company kept, what kind of neanderthal doesn’t brush their teeth all weekend? A consistently irritating read.

AUTHORITY Jeff VanderMeer

The second book in Jeff VanderMeer’s Southern Reach trilogy picks up where things left off in Annihilation – sort of. The focus has shifted to the shadowy government agency that has been overseeing the various expeditions into Area X. Our protagonist, John Rodrigues (nicknamed “Control”), assumes command of the operation and attempts to make sense of the baffling leads in the ongoing investigation: secret notes, a bizarre video, and an uncooperative witness (the biologist from the first book). He begins to suspect that Area X has broken containment and gained a foothold in our reality, the realization dawning on the reader in a simultaneous slow, creeping burn of a narrative. The subversive terror of the first book is ratcheted up, building to a disquieting climax that left me in great anticipation for the final instalment.

GREAT NORTH ROAD by Peter F. Hamilton

The murder of a member of the powerful North “family of clones” triggers an investigation that peels the onion on a dark conspiracy, ancestral secrets, covert weaponry, and a desperate alien sentience. More masterful world-building in this epic narrative that jumps around different points of view, some (the military hunt for an otherworldly predator) more interesting than others (the official police investigation). It’s an interesting, though at times overwrought ride that culminates in a resolution that will please fans of scifi, fans of clever thrillers less so.

NEBULA AWARDS SHOWCASE 2014 edited by Kij Johnson

A selection of this past year’s Nebula award winners and nominees showcases a varied mix of stories and excerpts. My favorites were the more character-oriented entries: “After the Fall, Before the Fall, During the Fall”,a Nancy Kress eco-thriller about a group of post-apocalypstic survivors who travel back in time, kidnapping children to help ensure humanity’s survival, and “Christmas Inn” by Gene Wolf, a deceptive, deep and textured tale about a struggling family hosting some strange guests on Christmas Eve. Some big, provocative ideas.

FROSTBORN by Lou Anders

Award-winning editor Lou Anders first novel is a Norse-inspired, adventure-fueled tale for young fantasy enthusiasts. Karn, a young farmer-to-be, strikes up an unlikely friendship with Thianna, a half-giantess, to take on undead forces, an ancient dragon, troublesome trolls, an opportunistic uncle, and more! If you’re looking to inspire your child to follow in your Martin/Eddings/Jordan-loving footsteps, then this book is a great place to start.

FUTURE BABBLE by Dan Gardner

Author Dan Gardner looks at our innate desire for order and how it drives us to seek pattern in a chaotic universe. Experts, it turns out, are no more accurate than the flip of a coin, and their popularity has less to do with their predicive successes (or lack thereof) than showmanship. An interesting if not altogether unsurprising read.

THE TROOP by Nick Cutter

A field trip on an isolated island takes a horrific turn for a group of young boys when their scout leader welcomes an emaciated stranger into their camp. It’s a horror version of Lord of Flies that is at turns harrowing, humorous, and thoroughly engaging. Wonderfully written. It’s heads and shoulders above most novels in the genre.

SWORDS AND DEVILTRY by Fritz Leiber

The first book in one of my very favorite fantasy series starts off with a more of a determined whimper than a bang, offering an interesting, dark, at times surprisingly somber account of the early lives of our two heroes and their eventual meeting. There are flashes of fun throughout, especially in the dynamic between Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser, initially as strangers crossing paths, then as fast friends over drinks and, finally, as allies united in revenge. Not as strong as the ensuing instalments, but solid storytelling nevertheless, holding the promise of greatness to come.

WALKING IN CIRCLES BEFORE LYING DOWN by Merrill Markoe

Our protagonist is a romantic loser whose increasingly pathetic existence is dealt a curveball the day her dog begins to talk to her. And not just her dog. She soon realizes she can hold conversations with other dogs as well. And what do all these dogs have to say? Oh, you know, pretty much what you’d expect a dog to say if you’ve read any of those anthromorphic animal comic strips. They offer “hilarious” insights into relationships and life, are able to recognize and identify an Oasis song but, on the other hand, mysteriously have no understanding of tears or death. The opportunity for “funny” dialogue trumps reason – but, hey, it’s a book about talking dogs so I suppose I shouldn’t expect internal logic to prevail. The writing style reads like David Sedaris lite.

Enjoyed the Look Who’s Talking movies? Well, you may enjoy this book as well.

A DANCE WITH DRAGONS by George R. R. Martin

The first three books rank among my Top 10 Fantasy Reads, so it’s been incredibly disappointing to see the wheels fall off this once great series. Back in the day, it used to be a true page turner, building suspense from chapter to chapter, offering unexpected twists and shocking turns. Now, the individual stories drag out as more and more characters are added to the increasingly complex mix. Two-thirds of the way through this book, all those characters reached critical mass and I began to lose my patience as well as interest.

BIRD BOX by Josh Malerman

A suspenseful horror thriller that is undermined by some minor inconsistencies in logic. A series of bizarre murder-suicides in Russia pique the media’s interest, but when these horrific incidents begin to proliferate and start striking closer to home, the world descends into a blind panic. Rumour spreads that people are being driven insane by the sight of some mysterious otherworldly entities and, soon, people have retreated into their homes, covering up their windows, refusing to open their eyes if they venture outdoors. The novel opens on our protagonist, Malorie, as she attempts to safeguard the lives of two young children, then jumps back in time to, five years earlier, when a pregnant Malorie seeks refuge with a group of survivors. We hop back and forth, between the past and present, and the twin stories unfold in spellbinding fashion. Still, issues arise when you stop to reflect. People seem to connect these strange murders to a visual cue way too quickly and with little evidence to support this theory. Animals (dogs, wolves) are seemingly unaffected by the sight of these creatures and yet, later in the novel, ARE affected. Perhaps oddest of all is Malorie’s decision to name the children Boy and Girl rather than giving them proper names. Minor quibbles aside, however, it’s a helluva page-turner.