1st Place - "I seen the trouble plain as day when I's down there on my back before." (50)
2nd Place - "Goin' on a year now, I ain't had nothin' twixt my nethers weren't run on batteries!" (50)
3rd Place - "Aye sir, Captain Tightpants." (50)
4th Place - "Bye now. Have good sex!" (50)
5th Place - "Everything's shiny, Cap'n, not to fret!" (50)
6th Place - "Look, they've got lad whores. Isn't that thoughtful? I wonder if they service lass folk at all..." (50)
7th Place - "Well, it's not like anyone else is lining up to, you know... examine me." (Heart of Gold) (50)
8th Place - "Up until the punching, it was a real nice party." (50)
9th Place - Simon: "So, what are we doing?" Kaylee: "Oh, crime." (50)
10th Place - *kisses Mal* "I love my captain." (50)
11th - (to Simon) Don't worry they'll be back before you can spit. Not that you... spit. (50)
12th - "Oh well let's see...we killed Simon and River, stole a bunch of medicine, and the Cap'n and Zoe are springin' the others got snatched by the feds." (50)
13th - "The hell with this, I'm gonna live!" (50)
14th - Kaylee: (petting the ship) "That's my girl. That's my good girl." (50)
15th - "You mean to say as... Sex?!" (50)
16th - "And then his folks come by to fetch him... and it turns out he's like fourteen years old! I mean he must have been some kind of genetic experiment 'cause I swear this guy was uh... oh my daddy whupped me so hard." (50)
17th - "Shows off your backside. Did you see the chandelier? It's hovering." (50)
18th - "I'm glad I rated higher than dead bessie here." (50)
19th-Kaylee: "You're gonna come with us." Book: "Excuse me?" Kaylee: "You like ships. You don't seem to be looking at the destinations. What you care about is the ships, and mine's the nicest." Book: She don't look like much." Kaylee: "Oh, she'll fool ya." (50)
20th - Kaylee: "Don't let the space bugs bite." (50)
21st - "Don't you just love this party? Everything's so fancy, and there's some kind of hot cheese over there." (50)
22nd Kaylee: "They're fine. So, what happened? Another terrible brawl?" - Zoe: "Oddly enough, there was." (50)
23rd - "No, it's shiny. I like meeting new people! They all have stories!" (50)
24th - "Ooh, mangos!" (50)
25th - "The whole point of swearin' is that it ain't appropriate." (50)
26th - "Have faith, Cap'n." (50)
27th "Figures... First time in the Core, and what do I get to do? Dig through trash. Why couldn't he send me shopping at the Tri-plex, or... Ooh! Synchronizers!" (50)
"Is that him? ... Well how can we be sure, unless we question it?" (19)
"Everyone's got somebody. Wash, tell me I'm pretty." (5)
"You just don't like her 'cause she can read your mind, and everything you think is mean!" (8)
"Sometimes, something breaks... can't be fixed." (2)
"And don't ride in anything with a Capson thirty engine, they fall right out of the sky!" (2)
"If I mess up, not like you'll be able to yell at me." (1)
"Who? Simon? No, he's much too- I mean I'm just- Do you think it looks better up?" (0)
"Tell that to Inara." (0)
"Oh, don't worry honey, he makes everybody cry. He's like a monster." (2)
"But how can you be sure Inara don't just wanna see you? Sometimes people have feelings. I'm referring here to people." (2)
"I think it's the sweetest hat ever." (7)
"Not speaking to you Captain." (3)
(Pushes aside severely injured Jayne) "Are you okay?" (7)
"These lasses have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I, how about that?" (0)
"You just wanna take a bite out of him all over, you know?" (10)
"Goin' dark.... okay, now I can't get down." (1)
Inara: "So, do aliens live among us?" Kaylee: "Yeah. One of them's a doctor." (5)
Kaylee: "It's a train heist. See we fly over the train car, the captain and Zoë sneak in, we lower Jayne onto the car, and they bundle up the booty, and we haul 'em all back up. Easy as lyin'. Simon: "So you've done this before?" Kaylee: "Oh, hell no." (0)
(In Chinese) "Why don't you tell the cow about its beautiful eyes?" (0)
Kaylee: "It's a swan. I like it." Inara: "You do?" Kaylee: "Looks like it was made with, you know, longing. Made by a person really longed to see a swan." (0)
"That was real pretty, Captain. What you just said." (0)
Simon: "Kaylee, move your feet. Kaylee, stay with me. Stay with me. Can you move your feet?" - Kaylee: "Are you asking me to dance?" (9)
- River: "I can win this." - Kaylee: "Oh I'm hearin' a lot of talk there, genius. Come on, show me what you got." (8)
- Kaylee: "You can see she don't wanna be parked like that. The port thrust's gone, and that's what's makin' her spin the way she is." (32)
Kaylee: "But Captain, did you hear what that purple-belly called Serenity?" (4)
Kaylee: "Six gerstlers crammed under every cooling drive so that you strain your primary atery function and you end up having to recycle secondary exhaust through a bypass system just so's you don't end up pumpin' it through then atmofeed and asphyxiating the entire crew. Now that's junk." (24)
2nd Place - "Goin' on a year now, I ain't had nothin' twixt my nethers weren't run on batteries!" (50)
3rd Place - "Aye sir, Captain Tightpants." (50)
4th Place - "Bye now. Have good sex!" (50)
5th Place - "Everything's shiny, Cap'n, not to fret!" (50)
6th Place - "Look, they've got lad whores. Isn't that thoughtful? I wonder if they service lass folk at all..." (50)
7th Place - "Well, it's not like anyone else is lining up to, you know... examine me." (Heart of Gold) (50)
8th Place - "Up until the punching, it was a real nice party." (50)
9th Place - Simon: "So, what are we doing?" Kaylee: "Oh, crime." (50)
10th Place - *kisses Mal* "I love my captain." (50)
11th - (to Simon) Don't worry they'll be back before you can spit. Not that you... spit. (50)
12th - "Oh well let's see...we killed Simon and River, stole a bunch of medicine, and the Cap'n and Zoe are springin' the others got snatched by the feds." (50)
13th - "The hell with this, I'm gonna live!" (50)
14th - Kaylee: (petting the ship) "That's my girl. That's my good girl." (50)
15th - "You mean to say as... Sex?!" (50)
16th - "And then his folks come by to fetch him... and it turns out he's like fourteen years old! I mean he must have been some kind of genetic experiment 'cause I swear this guy was uh... oh my daddy whupped me so hard." (50)
17th - "Shows off your backside. Did you see the chandelier? It's hovering." (50)
18th - "I'm glad I rated higher than dead bessie here." (50)
19th-Kaylee: "You're gonna come with us." Book: "Excuse me?" Kaylee: "You like ships. You don't seem to be looking at the destinations. What you care about is the ships, and mine's the nicest." Book: She don't look like much." Kaylee: "Oh, she'll fool ya." (50)
20th - Kaylee: "Don't let the space bugs bite." (50)
21st - "Don't you just love this party? Everything's so fancy, and there's some kind of hot cheese over there." (50)
22nd Kaylee: "They're fine. So, what happened? Another terrible brawl?" - Zoe: "Oddly enough, there was." (50)
23rd - "No, it's shiny. I like meeting new people! They all have stories!" (50)
24th - "Ooh, mangos!" (50)
25th - "The whole point of swearin' is that it ain't appropriate." (50)
26th - "Have faith, Cap'n." (50)
27th "Figures... First time in the Core, and what do I get to do? Dig through trash. Why couldn't he send me shopping at the Tri-plex, or... Ooh! Synchronizers!" (50)
"Is that him? ... Well how can we be sure, unless we question it?" (19)
"Everyone's got somebody. Wash, tell me I'm pretty." (5)
"You just don't like her 'cause she can read your mind, and everything you think is mean!" (8)
"Sometimes, something breaks... can't be fixed." (2)
"And don't ride in anything with a Capson thirty engine, they fall right out of the sky!" (2)
"If I mess up, not like you'll be able to yell at me." (1)
"Who? Simon? No, he's much too- I mean I'm just- Do you think it looks better up?" (0)
"Tell that to Inara." (0)
"Oh, don't worry honey, he makes everybody cry. He's like a monster." (2)
"But how can you be sure Inara don't just wanna see you? Sometimes people have feelings. I'm referring here to people." (2)
"I think it's the sweetest hat ever." (7)
"Not speaking to you Captain." (3)
(Pushes aside severely injured Jayne) "Are you okay?" (7)
"These lasses have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I, how about that?" (0)
"You just wanna take a bite out of him all over, you know?" (10)
"Goin' dark.... okay, now I can't get down." (1)
Inara: "So, do aliens live among us?" Kaylee: "Yeah. One of them's a doctor." (5)
Kaylee: "It's a train heist. See we fly over the train car, the captain and Zoë sneak in, we lower Jayne onto the car, and they bundle up the booty, and we haul 'em all back up. Easy as lyin'. Simon: "So you've done this before?" Kaylee: "Oh, hell no." (0)
(In Chinese) "Why don't you tell the cow about its beautiful eyes?" (0)
Kaylee: "It's a swan. I like it." Inara: "You do?" Kaylee: "Looks like it was made with, you know, longing. Made by a person really longed to see a swan." (0)
"That was real pretty, Captain. What you just said." (0)
Simon: "Kaylee, move your feet. Kaylee, stay with me. Stay with me. Can you move your feet?" - Kaylee: "Are you asking me to dance?" (9)
- River: "I can win this." - Kaylee: "Oh I'm hearin' a lot of talk there, genius. Come on, show me what you got." (8)
- Kaylee: "You can see she don't wanna be parked like that. The port thrust's gone, and that's what's makin' her spin the way she is." (32)
Kaylee: "But Captain, did you hear what that purple-belly called Serenity?" (4)
Kaylee: "Six gerstlers crammed under every cooling drive so that you strain your primary atery function and you end up having to recycle secondary exhaust through a bypass system just so's you don't end up pumpin' it through then atmofeed and asphyxiating the entire crew. Now that's junk." (24)
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