I don't really see him like that. I think he's a guy that's been through hell and is trying to be a hero, but isn't always doing the greatest job. That said, I haven't always agreed with his choices. I think, for one, how he's treated Thea has been appalling. He ran off and left her for five months after the Undertaking. Her mother had just been thrown in jail - who exactly was looking out for her? And then he abandons her again after Slade kills Moira. I get that both times he was pushed to the breaking point, but he's all the family Thea has left (that he's aware of anyway).Personally what I see is, he is selfish, self centred a lot of the time and untrustworthy when it comes to romantic relationships. But that's just my opinion.
I also think he can be rather astoundingly hypocritical at times - his break with Moira over her secret keeping, when he was planning on keeping the same secret from Thea, was one of the more breathtaking examples.
But I still like him as a character and I think he's trying to do the right thing - he's just not always succeeding. (And I should say I don't actually totally agree with his "no killing at all" stance.)
I firmly believe that Oliver did not consciously choose Sara over Shado. Oliver says that in his feelings of guilt, but that's not what I saw. What I saw was Oliver refusing to choose, and then throwing himself in front of the gun when Ivo pointed it at Sara. I believe he would have reacted exactly the same way if Ivo had pointed the gun at Shado and then Sara would be dead. There was no choice. Ivo tricked him. (And by the way, may I just say how utterly contrived that whole scenario was? I realize they needed a reason to set Slade against Oliver, but surely they could have come up with something less ridiculous than that.)chose her when crazy guy (forgot his name ) threatened both her and Shado, even though he was in a relationship with Shado at the time.
And I guess I don't see how Oliver and Sara getting back together in Starling City was him somehow choosing her over Laurel. There's nothing to "choose" her over. He and Laurel weren't in a relationship - it's not like she was an option for him to be able to choose. (I just reread that and I'm not sure it makes any sense, but I'm not sure how else to say it.)
I'm not sure it's possible for my opinion of Laurel to get lower, but I agree on them getting back together. She should be singing that Taylor Swift song to him...what are the words? Something like..."we are never ever getting back together, like, EVER."If she does get back with Oliver then my low estimation of her would hit an all time low.