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  1. #21
    Major General BruTak's Avatar
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    Teal'c Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    Dr. Dick Solomon: "I'm sorry, there is simply no room in the budget for raises. But I can go you one better: promotions! Sally, you are now Senior Security Officer."
    Sally Solomon: "That'll look good on the old résumé."
    Dick Solomon: "Tommy, you are now Senior Information Officer."
    Tommy Solomon: "It's about time..."
    Harry Solomon: "What about me?"
    Dick Solomon: "Harry, you are now... Harold."
    Harry Solomon: "Champagne for everyone!"

    Long before you and I were born, others beat these benches with their empty cups,
    To the night and its stars, to the here and now with who we are.

    Another sunrise with my sad captains, with who I choose to lose my mind,
    And if it's all we only pass this way but once, what a perfect waste of time.

  2. #22
    Second Lieutenant zbir's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    Tommy: [about a movie Harry has seen] How was it? I heard there was an awesome shower scene.
    Harry: Oh, yeah...but then this naked girl got in and you could barely see the shower.

    Strudwick: My daughter just ran off with your ragamuffin son!
    Dick: "Ragamuffin"?! Sally, throw him out; Harry, bring me a dictionary

    Harry: Sally, I'm starving. What's for dinner?
    Sally: Oh, I made you some hamburgers--they're down at the hamburger place. All you have to do is go there, order them, and pay for them.

  3. #23
    Second Lieutenant zbir's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    [the Solomons are angry at Dick because he crashed the car]
    Dick: Hey, be thankful I wasn't killed!
    Sally: Yeah, because then we'd have to hitch a ride to your funeral, BECAUSE YOU WRECKED OUR FREAKIN' CAR!

    Officer Don You have to have insurance!
    Dick: Why? It's just a bet against myself! The only way I can win my money back is by getting horribly injured.

    Vincent Strudwick: So... what'd you think of the book?
    Dick: As bathroom fare? A triumph!

    Dick: Harry, are you naked or am I seeing things?
    Harry: Actually it's a little of both

  4. #24
    Second Lieutenant zbir's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    Dick: My pants fit! I won the war!
    Harry: That's great, Dick! So you lost weight?
    Dick: Even better - I bought bigger pants!

    [Dick and Sally are doped out on antidepressants]
    Sally: I like TV.
    Dick: Me too. Let's say we turn it on. [he turns it on]
    Sally: It's even better on.

    Dick: Harry, did I get any phone calls?
    Harry: Oh, yes, it rang repeatedly.
    Dick: And... who called?
    Harry: Well, I don't know, Dick, I'm not clairvoyant.

    Tommy: You're gonna be like some sort of alien Martin Luther King?
    Harry: Exactly. Because I, too, have a dream. And in that dream I'm naked on a ferris wheel

    Dick: Tomorrow there will be a pop quiz on the effects of thermodynamics. Remember it's a pop quiz; if you study, I'll know!

    Mary: They opened a Hard Rock Café in Vietnam. The world's changed, huh?
    Dick: It certainly has. Did you know it used to be entirely covered with ice?

  5. #25
    Second Lieutenant zbir's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    Dick Solomon: Nina, take my car to the garage and rotate my tires.
    Nina Campbell: That's not in my job description.
    Dick Solomon: What is in your job description?
    Nina Campbell: Typing.
    Dick Solomon: Ok, well, type it into your job description and get my tires rotated.

    [Harry is looking for a job offer in the newspaper]

    Harry Solomon: Here's a job that I can do. "Police are seeking third gunman." Tomorrow, I'm gonna march over to the police station and show them that I'm the man they're looking for


    Harry Solomon: So, when can I touch your breasts?
    Sally Solomon: Right before you die!

    Sally Solomon: What happened, Harry?
    Harry Solomon: It came out!
    Dick Solomon: Is it an alien?
    Harry Solomon: Well, it's purple, and it's slimy, and it's got a hose.
    Sally Solomon: A hose?
    Tommy Solomon: Oh, great. It's a mutant.
    Dick Solomon: Alright, we'll kidnap him, and hide him, when it's a teenager we'll set him free, and then if it's really messed up, we can blame him on television.
    [Marry Albright arrives]
    Mary Albright: They just brought him to the nursery. He is positively glowing.
    Harry Solomon: Now it's glowing.
    Mary Albright: Let's go see him. He's got Vicky's eyes.
    Harry Solomon: What's he doing with Vicky's eyes?
    Sally Solomon: I just hope it's not eating them.


    [around Super Bowl season]
    Harry Solomon: Tell me what you've done to Sally. Where are you taking her?
    Mascha: I can't. I wish I could.
    Harry Solomon: Can't you give me a hint?
    Mascha: All right... We're going to do something on the weekend... in San Diego.
    Harry Solomon: Why can't you give me hint?
    Mascha: We're going to do something on Sunday... in San Diego.
    Harry Solomon: Just one clue?
    Mascha: We're going to something on SUNDAY... in SAN DIEGO... at a STADIUM.
    Harry Solomon: Just one tiny clue?
    Mascha: The Super Bowl, Harry!
    Harry Solomon: WORK WITH ME, BABY! WHICH SUPER BOWL?

  6. #26
    Major General BruTak's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    And the absolute best lines of the series -

    Big Giant Head (William Shatner): "It was a horrible flight! There was a man on the wing of the plane!"
    Dick Solomon (John Lithgow): "The same thing happened to me!"

    Long before you and I were born, others beat these benches with their empty cups,
    To the night and its stars, to the here and now with who we are.

    Another sunrise with my sad captains, with who I choose to lose my mind,
    And if it's all we only pass this way but once, what a perfect waste of time.

  7. #27
    Lieutenant Colonel Ikorni's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    I hadn't realised just how many classic lines there were!

  8. #28
    Major General BruTak's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    Quote Originally Posted by Ikorni View Post
    I hadn't realised just how many classic lines there were!
    I know.

    *Sticks DVDs on the re-watch pile for when I'm done with my re-watch of Battlestar Galactica*

    Long before you and I were born, others beat these benches with their empty cups,
    To the night and its stars, to the here and now with who we are.

    Another sunrise with my sad captains, with who I choose to lose my mind,
    And if it's all we only pass this way but once, what a perfect waste of time.

  9. #29
    Second Lieutenant zbir's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    ..and my favorite banter:




    Dick: Good morning, all!
    All: Uh-huh./ Mm.
    Dick: What's with the classified, Sally?
    Sally: I'm getting my own apartment.
    Dick: Excuse me?
    Sally: I've decided I need my own space.
    Dick: Oh, no. No, no, no.
    Sally: Dick, it's time.
    Dick: It's not time. And what's more, it will never be time. Now, I'm gonna leave and come back into the room, and we'll just start this whole day over again. Good morning, all!
    All: Hey. /Mo rning.
    Dick: What's with the classified, Sally?
    Sally: I'm getting my own apartment?
    Dick: You're what?!
    Sally: Dick, I need my own space!
    Dick: Out of the question! We are a unit! We are on a mission! (...) Harry, talk some sense into her.
    Harry: I got a lot on my mind, Dick. I'm thinking about having a baby with Vicki.
    Dick: You're what?! (...) Are you insane? (...) What is happening to this unit? (...) What about you, Tommy? Are you running away to join the circus?
    Tommy: No. I'm just going baby-sitting with Alissa, my girlfriend.
    (...)
    Dick: Now stop this right now! I am issuing a command decision. No one on this mission will be doing any impregnating, relocating, or baby-sitting without my express written consent! Now, let's just try to start this day right, shall we? Good morning, all!
    All: Good morning, jerk./ Jackass! / Creep!
    Dick: That's better.

  10. #30
    Second Lieutenant zbir's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    Quote Originally Posted by BruTak View Post
    And the absolute best lines of the series -

    Big Giant Head (William Shatner): "It was a horrible flight! There was a man on the wing of the plane!"
    Dick Solomon (John Lithgow): "The same thing happened to me!"
    I don't get the joke !

  11. #31
    Major General BruTak's Avatar
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    Teal'c Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    Quote Originally Posted by zbir View Post
    I don't get the joke !
    It's a reference to "The Twilight Zone", specifically the episode "Nightmare at 20,000 Feet".

    Shatner played the main character in the original 1963 TV episode, while John Lithgow played the character in 1983's "Twilight Zone: The Movie".

    en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nightmare_at_20,000_Feet

    Long before you and I were born, others beat these benches with their empty cups,
    To the night and its stars, to the here and now with who we are.

    Another sunrise with my sad captains, with who I choose to lose my mind,
    And if it's all we only pass this way but once, what a perfect waste of time.

  12. #32
    Major General BruTak's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    Harry: "They're here! They're here! Albino brain chiggers! COVER YOUR EARS!"

    Long before you and I were born, others beat these benches with their empty cups,
    To the night and its stars, to the here and now with who we are.

    Another sunrise with my sad captains, with who I choose to lose my mind,
    And if it's all we only pass this way but once, what a perfect waste of time.

  13. #33
    Second Lieutenant zbir's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    Quote Originally Posted by BruTak View Post
    It's a reference to "The Twilight Zone", specifically the episode "Nightmare at 20,000 Feet".

    Shatner played the main character in the original 1963 TV episode, while John Lithgow played the character in 1983's "Twilight Zone: The Movie".

    en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nightmare_at_20,000_Feet
    )))))) It's hilarious!
    Thank you!

  14. #34
    Second Lieutenant zbir's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    I'm watching it from the begining, and love the jokes:

    Dick: We have to talk.
    All: What is it?
    Dick: There's an important detail that we forgot to attend to. We need birthdays.
    Sally: No, thank you. This guy I saw at a restaurant had a birthday. They set his food on fire and then blew on it.

    Nina: Good morning.
    Dick: I seem to be having a little trouble swallowing. Do you happen to know if there's an alternate stomach access?
    Nina: Are you sick?
    Dick: Yes, and the novelty is starting to wear off.

    Sally: If you insist on being stubborn, at least take some of this cough syrup.
    Dick: I don't need it.
    Sally: Dick, you have to. The lady at the drugstore said if this doesn't work, we have to put a vaporizer in your room.
    Dick: Oh, no!


    Dick: What happened?
    Mary: My date for a wedding tomorrow night canceled at the last minute. His brother came out of the coma.
    Dick. A wedding?
    Mary: Yeah, a big reception.
    Dick: A ritual?
    Mary: Very traditional-- crying, dancing.
    Dick: And the female devours the male immediately after the ceremony?
    Mary:No. That's a process that takes years and years.

    Priest:We are gathered together here in the sight of god and in the face of this company to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony, (...)
    Dick: Which of those guys is god?


    Dick: Now, how were those two able to find each other?
    Mary: It was fate. He's rich. She wanted money . I give it a year.
    (...)
    Best man: Hear, hear. To a lifetime of happiness together.
    Dick: We give it a year!

  15. #35
    Major General BruTak's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    Dick: "Family meeting!" [Spots Vicki Dubcek] "You're not family, get out!"

    Long before you and I were born, others beat these benches with their empty cups,
    To the night and its stars, to the here and now with who we are.

    Another sunrise with my sad captains, with who I choose to lose my mind,
    And if it's all we only pass this way but once, what a perfect waste of time.

  16. #36
    The Monitor jelgate's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    Quote Originally Posted by aretood2 View Post
    Jelgate is right

  17. #37
    Major General BruTak's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    Ok, here's a puzzler - no idea why it didn't occur to me before - how come Officer Don is referred to as "Officer" if he's a sergeant?

    Long before you and I were born, others beat these benches with their empty cups,
    To the night and its stars, to the here and now with who we are.

    Another sunrise with my sad captains, with who I choose to lose my mind,
    And if it's all we only pass this way but once, what a perfect waste of time.

  18. #38
    Second Lieutenant zbir's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    I started (another) re-watch, and it's as hilarious as ever :-)
    Big LOL at the episode when they were searching for a ethnic group to belong to ("A Dick like me"):

    DICK: Tommy, I talked to your teacher, Mr.Randell. He said that you're not fitting in.
    TOMMY: Of course I'm not fitting in. To fit in, you have to be something.
    DICK: Well, we're something. We're human beings.Why, has anyone said differently?
    TOMMY: No, it's just everybody at school is something extra.You know, they're African- American or Italian-American or Asian-American, audio-Visual American.
    DICK: Well, we're human-American. That should be enough.


    DICK: Nina, what is that thing on your head?
    NINA: It's called a daku.
    DICK: I think it's beautiful.
    NINA: Thank you. It's authentic. It makes me feel connected to my ancestors.
    DICK: Oh. So that's the traditional headdress of ancient secretaries?

    MARY: I'm Irish, and I'm very proud of that. And you're what?
    DICK: Me? Uh, I-I-I'm, uh one of those, uh you know, one of the really good ones.You're this big anthropologist. You tell me. What am I?
    MARY: Certifiable.
    DICK: Yes, that's what I am-- certifiable. Certifiable and damn proud of it, as my father was before me and his father before him and his father before him. Certifiable. Of course, we no longer practice.

    HARRY: Well, you know, if you really want Mr.Randell, use the skills you're comfortable with.
    Shoot a tranquilizer dart into his neck and drag him back to your place.

    DICK: Oh! Who knew that Solomon was a Jewish name when we took it off the side of that truck? Go figure.
    HARRY: We could have been the wal-marts.
    DICK: We're Jewish. I don't know what to say.
    HARRY: Mazel tov! (...)
    DICK: Isn't it great to know who we are? I finally feel like I belong in this big melting pot they call earth. What a magical night. Everything was perfect.
    SALLY: I was great. He really liked my kissing, except the spitting and biting.
    DICK: So you really like him, huh?
    SALLY: What's not to like? He's intelligent, kind, sweet, gentle.
    DICK: So is he Jewish?

  19. #39
    Major General BruTak's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    Just found out that actress Elmarie Wendel (Mrs. Dubcek) passed away on the 21st of July, aged 89.

    Long before you and I were born, others beat these benches with their empty cups,
    To the night and its stars, to the here and now with who we are.

    Another sunrise with my sad captains, with who I choose to lose my mind,
    And if it's all we only pass this way but once, what a perfect waste of time.

  20. #40
    Jacob Carter Looney's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3rd Rock From The Sun (1996)

    Quote Originally Posted by BruTak View Post
    Just found out that actress Elmarie Wendel (Mrs. Dubcek) passed away on the 21st of July, aged 89.
    Very sad, but 89 is a pretty decent run. I finished watching the whole series about 2 years ago and I have to admit that is still the only show I know her from. She was great. I wish the show had more of her and Jan Hooks. They were a good duo.

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