Bad boss jokes

[SEREN LWCH (MAL)]

I was browsing around the net and i found this:

http://www.successunlimited.co.uk/humour/jokes.htm

I really like this 1:

Corporate filly

The Dakota Indians of North America passed on this piece of wisdom from generation by word of mouth - "If you are riding a dead horse the best thing to do is dismount". However in the corporate world because of the heavy investment factor other things to be tried, (but not limited to) are the following

buy a stronger whip
change riders
threaten the horse with termination
appoint a committee to study the horse
arrange to visit other sites to see how they ride dead horses
lower the standards so dead horses can be included
appoint an intervention team to reanimate the horse
create a training session to increase the riders load share
reclassify the horse as `living impaired'
change the form so it reads "This horse is not dead"
hire outside contractors to ride the dead horse
harness several dead horses together for increased speed and efficiency
donate the dead horse to a recognised charity therefore deducting its full original cost
provide additional funding to increase horse's performance
do a time management study to see if lighter riders would improve productivity
purchase an after market product that makes dead horses run faster
declare the dead horse has lower overheads and is therefore more cost effective
form a quality focus group to find profitable uses for dead horses
rewrite the performance requirements for horses
and finally if all else fails.....promote the dead horse into a supervisory (management) position

[SEREN LWCH (MAL)]

Political Philosophies Explained in Simple Two-Cow Terms

SOCIALISM You have two cows. You keep one and give one to your neighbor.

COMMUNISM You have two cows. The government takes them both and provides you with milk.

FASCISM You have two cows. The government takes them and sells you the milk.

BUREAUCRACY You have two cows. The government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, and then pours it down the drain.

CAPITALISM You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

CORPORATE You have two cows. You sell one, force the other to produce the milk of four cows, then act surprised when it drops dead.

DEMOCRACY You have two cows. The government taxes you to the point that you must sell them both in order to pay the taxes to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow which was a gift from your government.

[Matt G]

There's an Enron entry to that last gag but I can't remember the details off the top of my head.

[Bagpuss]

Good thread, MAL !
Everyone I've ever met, has had a Bad Boss at some point.....or probs with colleagues .

I loved this bit :

Posted to the Bullyonline forum in December...

"Hi All!

I'm so happy to have found this group...

I work for a well-known world-wide toy distributor. I have a physical abnormality which makes me different than my co-workers and even the kindest of people can't help but stare. I'm afraid it would make me stand out in a dark room.

Most of my co-workers laugh at me and call me names - and one of them is a real Vixen. I'm never invited to join in any social activities or play on any company games such the winter sports popular in my area.

As it turns out, I am the best one in my company to lead the distributing team during the holiday season and even my boss has had to acknowledge this. I am worried that after this season though, it will be business as usual - being treated like an animal.

All suggestions are welcome!

Sincerely,

Rudolph "

*Sniffle *