Things You Wouldn't Want To Hear in the Tardis or in the Torchwood Hub

[JJSNgadget]

Gwen: I prefer chocolate.
Jack: Spreadable or sauce???
Tosh: I was going to get some lunch but I've changed my mind.

MYFANWY: *aaahhhhawwwwwnnnnnkkkkk"
OWEN: "Guys, I think she's getting hungry."

[Allestian]

Jack: After you Ianto.
Ianto: After you Owen.
Owen: No after you Yan...
(The girls just sigh and run off for the bucket of fish)
Tosh: Filthy, disgusting, slimy...
Gwen: The fish???
Tosh: The boys.

[JJSNgadget]

BBC WALES NEWSREADER: "Residents of Caerdydd have reported seeing what appears to be a pterodactyl flying near the Millennium center. Witness claim the prehistoric bird flies primarily at night and never strays far from the millennium square..."
OWEN: "Sh!t Jack! Myfanwy's made the news."
GWEN: "I did warn you, honestly, letting her fly in public."
BBC WALES NEWSREADER: "...here is amateur footage taken of the creature in flight..."
OWEN: "Some punk even got her on his video phone."
JACK: "Maybe I could put a perception filter on her."

[Allestian]

Could imagine that dialogue in season three of Torchwood...

Jack: Psst, kid!
Lad: What???
Jack: Did you hear about that pterodactyl???
Lad: Yeah, what of -
BUZZ!!! THUNK!!!

[JJSNgadget]

IANTO: "I don't believe we have enough to ret-con all of Cardiff, sir."
--------------------------------------

DOCTOR: "I can't do it, I can't cope. We're travelling at the speed of time, me bottle's gone."
*the Tardis rocks*
DOCTOR: "Gordon Bennett that was a close one!"
MARTHA: "Doctor, what's the problem? You're supposed to have an IQ of 6000, aren't you?"
DOCTOR: "Look, we're travelling faster than the speed of time. That means, by the time we see something, we've already reached yesterday. Even with an IQ of 6000, it's still brown trousers time."

[Allestian]

Doctor: What's that look for???
Donna: How many suits do you have???
Doctor: One.
Donna: Shirts???
Doctor: One.
Doctor: Socks!?
Doctor: One...pair.
Donna: Ties!!!
Doctor: Ah!!! Well that's different!!! Two. Why???
Donna: How often do you wash them???
Doctor: Erm...
Donna: Laundrette!!! Now!!!

[JJSNgadget]

Doctor: What's that look for???
Donna: How many suits do you have???
Doctor: One.
Donna: Shirts???
Doctor: One.
Doctor: Socks!?
Doctor: One...pair.
Donna: Ties!!!
Doctor: Ah!!! Well that's different!!! Two. Why???
Donna: How often do you wash them???
Doctor: Erm...
Donna: Laundrette!!! Now!!!

I love that: one...pair.

That only works if it's the Ninth doctor. Ten has two suits, and many shirts. I remember from series 2 and 3.

DOCTOR: But, Rose always did my laundry. Well, her mum did.
DONNA: Are you telling me you don't know how to do laundry?
DOCTOR: It's not something I ever worried about.
DONNA: Now, you're gonna learn, come on.
DOCTOR: *grumble, insult*
DONNA: What did you say?
DOCTOR: Nothing.

[Allestian]

Doctor: You know, there was once this planet where the sea looked this -
Donna: Oi!!! Fly boy!!! Pay attention!!!
Doctor: Fly boy??? What happened to Martian???
Donna: You complained too much!!!
Doctor: What if I complain about 'Fly boy'???
Donna: Then I'll make sure your trousers are small enough to fit a teddy.

Doctor: Uh-oh.
Donna: What???
Doctor: We need to refuel. Got to stop off at Cardiff...
Donna: Cardiff!!!
Doctor: Everywhere I go, always the same thing. "Cardiff??? Why do we have to stop at Cardiff???" Well I'll tell you why!!! There's a rift in time and space that runs through this place that feeds energy into the TARDIS. Happy???
Donna: How long will it take???
Doctor: Oh I dunno...long enough to watch a rugby match, see a play...get a bit too close with an old colleague...
Donna: Oh really??? And what do you mean about being close???
Doctor looks at Donna.
Doctor: Oh...nothing that's going to affect you.

(Oh no, after going off the Gwen bashing I'm now onto Donna bashing - what is wrong with me???)

[JJSNgadget]

Doctor: You know, there was once this planet where the sea looked this -
Donna: Oi!!! Fly boy!!! Pay attention!!!
Doctor: Fly boy??? What happened to Martian???
Donna: You complained too much!!!
Doctor: What if I complain about 'Fly boy'???
Donna: Then I'll make sure your trousers are small enough to fit a teddy.

Doctor: Uh-oh.
Donna: What???
Doctor: We need to refuel. Got to stop off at Cardiff...
Donna: Cardiff!!!
Doctor: Everywhere I go, always the same thing. "Cardiff??? Why do we have to stop at Cardiff???" Well I'll tell you why!!! There's a rift in time and space that runs through this place that feeds energy into the TARDIS. Happy???
Donna: How long will it take???
Doctor: Oh I dunno...long enough to watch a rugby match, see a play...get a bit too close with an old colleague...
Donna: Oh really??? And what do you mean about being close???
Doctor looks at Donna.
Doctor: Oh...nothing that's going to affect you.

(Oh no, after going off the Gwen bashing I'm now onto Donna bashing - what is wrong with me???)

OWEN: "Hello, Donna. What, no sweetcheeks, sugarpie, honey? Kissy-kissy."

[Allestian]

Oh boy...

Thank goodness this isn't a competition for a prize...

Donna: Ooooh!!! Aren't you a star!?!?
Doctor: Erm...Donna, there's something I should mention.
Donna: Shut up Fly boy!!! This has got nought to do with you!!!
Doctor: Well...yes...apart from the little issue of...
Donna: Whatever it is Doctor, I'm sure it can wait!!!
Doctor: But...
Donna walks off with Owen.
Doctor: (Whispers) You're going on a date with a dead man...

Doctor: Jack??? You can come back with me...all is forgiven.
Jack: Thanks but I need to stay here.
Doctor: No I mean it, please come back with me.
Jack: But...
Doctor: Now...
Jack: What's her name???
Doctor: What makes you think I'm hiding from a -
Jack: What...is...her...name???
Doctor: Donna. Help me.

[JJSNgadget]

JACK: Donna? Donna Noble? Ooohoohoooo! *laughs*
DOCTOR: Laugh it up, She's dating Owen.
JACK: Fu(k I'll never get rid of her now.
DOCTOR: *laughs*

[Allestian]

My chair just broke...there's a sharp metal piece that could hit my leg...

Anywho...

Jack: Owen???
Owen: Hmm???
Jack: You and Donna???
Owen: She's a cow...
Jack: Really???
Owen: Found out I was dead and ran for the hills.
Jack: I was wondering...
Owen: If you want to shoot her...be my guest...
Jack claps his hands happily.

(Oh no...this is going to far)

[JJSNgadget]

My chair just broke...there's a sharp metal piece that could hit my leg...

Did it break because you were laughing too hard, or leaning back, or was it natural wear and tear. I have a wooden chair.

IANTO: Lots of things you can do with a chair, sir.
JACK: Oh yeah?

[Allestian]

It's metal...it's wear and tear...and me sitting on it in the wrong manner...

Ianto: The new vibrating chairs just arrived sir...
Jack: Humans and their quaint needs...
Ianto: It comes with five settings apparently.
Jack: Oh really!?!?

[Coco Pops]

I guess we just have the same cultural background. What was your local forum about?

It was a local TV forum in the TV section of Behind Big Brother.. There are a couple of Dr. Who threads going there and I started one with my parodies and asked for more.. But all I am getting is replies consisting of rows of ...............................

Can someone explain all this myfawny stuff? who is Myfawny?