Things You Wouldn't Want To Hear in the Tardis or in the Torchwood Hub

[DigiFluid]

In either environ.... "What the hell is that?"

[Allestian]

"What is that mysterious ticking noise?"

[Madeleine]

It's highly contagious; we'll all have to stay here until the infectious stage passes. That'll be roughly two days after the pustules erupt, about when the sulphur dioxide emmissions stop.

[Coco Pops]

Gwen: "That's not the keyhole"
Owen: "Oops"

[rosey_angel]

Gwen: ok, i understand the perception filter, i understand that we are not alone in the universe, i even understand the rift, but can someone please tell me how the weevils come to our dimension wearing jumpsuits???

[JJSNgadget]

Gwen: ok, i understand the perception filter, i understand that we are not alone in the universe, i even understand the rift, but can someone please tell me how the weevils come to our dimension wearing jumpsuits???

JACK: Well, in addition to living in the sewers, they also work for the council.

ROSE: That's right, they're council weevils.
COUNCILMAN: They have council trucks, council axes, and council roads.
ROSE: But no council spaceships.

-----------------------
Och I typed 'council' so many times, now it looks weird to me.

[Reefgirl]

"What happens if I push this button"

[Allestian]

"Jack? How many pterodactyls do we have?"
"One."
"You sure about that?"

[JJSNgadget]

IANTO: Well, Myfanwy must have met a big bird cuz I'm seeing lil pterodactyls in her cage.
OWEN: What are you talking about, they don't look anything like Big Bird.
IANTO: Not 'Big Bird' a big bird.

GWEN: Oh, they're so cute.
TOSHIKO: Don't open the cage!
GWEN: Oops.

JACK: *facepalm* I work with idiots.

[Allestian]

(I actually called Myfanwy "Big Bird" in fanfiction notes a while ago)

*A few months later*

Ianto: Erm Jack? Some farmer near Bristol has reported half of his animals gone missing...that's somewhat of 500 sheep, 45 cows, two ducks, a chicken, and a yorkshire terrier.

[Coco Pops]

Gwen: "If I've told you once, I've told you twice that's not the keyhole"
Owen: "Oops, didn't htink you'd notice, or mind "

Jack: "Hello Gwen!"

[Allestian]

Aww that was evil...

Spoiler:

Jack: You put your left leg in...your left leg out...your left leg in...
*The team just looks in the direction of the office*

Have to be careful - if it gets my mates at college laughing their heads off then it must be watched.

[JJSNgadget]

(I actually called Myfanwy "Big Bird" in fanfiction notes a while ago)

*A few months later*

Ianto: Erm Jack? Some farmer near Bristol has reported half of his animals gone missing...that's somewhat of 500 sheep, 45 cows, two ducks, a chicken, and a yorkshire terrier.

GWEN: "They even got the dog?" *wibble*

--------------------------------------------
*whoosh, vrorp, whoosh, vrorp, whoosh*
-ten minutes later-
IANTO: "Would the owner of the blue box please move your conveyance? You're blocking our lift."

[Allestian]

Lmao!!!

In the deepest recesses of Myfanwy's cave...
Dog: Woof!!! Woof!!!

[JJSNgadget]

Lmao!!!

In the deepest recesses of Myfanwy's cave...
Dog: Woof!!! Woof!!!

*squeal, chomp*