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    A Message From Joss

    Joss posted this on Whedonesque yesterday (I also posted it in the Buffy/Angel thread here on GW), and I think that it's something really important that everyone should read.

    Last month seventeen year old Dua Khalil was pulled into a crowd of young men, some of them (the instigators) family, who then kicked and stoned her to death. This is an example of the breath-taking oxymoron “honor killing”, in which a family member (almost always female) is murdered for some religious or ethical transgression. Dua Khalil, who was of the Yazidi faith, had been seen in the company of a Sunni Muslim, and possibly suspected of having married him or converted. That she was torturously murdered for this is not, in fact, a particularly uncommon story. But now you can watch the action up close on CNN. Because as the girl was on the ground trying to get up, her face nothing but red, the few in the group of more than twenty men who were not busy kicking her and hurling stones at her were filming the event with their camera-phones.

    There were security officers standing outside the area doing nothing, but the footage of the murder was taken – by more than one phone – from the front row. Which means whoever shot it did so not to record the horror of the event, but to commemorate it. To share it. Because it was cool.

    I could start a rant about the level to which we have become desensitized to violence, about the evils of the voyeuristic digital world in which everything is shown and everything is game, but honestly, it’s been said. And I certainly have no jingoistic cultural agenda. I like to think that in America this would be considered unbearably appalling, that Kitty Genovese is still remembered, that we are more evolved. But coincidentally, right before I stumbled on this vid I watched the trailer for “Captivity”.

    A few of you may know that I took public exception to the billboard campaign for this film, which showed a concise narrative of the kidnapping, torture and murder of a sexy young woman. I wanted to see if the film was perhaps more substantial (especially given the fact that it was directed by “The Killing Fields” Roland Joffe) than the exploitive ad campaign had painted it. The trailer resembles nothing so much as the CNN story on Dua Khalil. Pretty much all you learn is that Elisha Cuthbert is beautiful, then kidnapped, inventively, repeatedly and horrifically tortured, and that the first thing she screams is “I’m sorry”.

    “I’m sorry.”

    What is wrong with women?

    I mean wrong. Physically. Spiritually. Something unnatural, something destructive, something that needs to be corrected.

    How did more than half the people in the world come out incorrectly? I have spent a good part of my life trying to do that math, and I’m no closer to a viable equation. And I have yet to find a culture that doesn’t buy into it. Women’s inferiority – in fact, their malevolence -- is as ingrained in American popular culture as it is anywhere they’re sporting burkhas. I find it in movies, I hear it in the jokes of colleagues, I see it plastered on billboards, and not just the ones for horror movies. Women are weak. Women are manipulative. Women are somehow morally unfinished. (Objectification: another tangential rant avoided.) And the logical extension of this line of thinking is that women are, at the very least, expendable.

    I try to think how we got here. The theory I developed in college (shared by many I’m sure) is one I have yet to beat: Womb Envy. Biology: women are generally smaller and weaker than men. But they’re also much tougher. Put simply, men are strong enough to overpower a woman and propagate. Women are tough enough to have and nurture children, with or without the aid of a man. Oh, and they’ve also got the equipment to do that, to be part of the life cycle, to create and bond in a way no man ever really will. Somewhere a long time ago a bunch of men got together and said, “If all we do is hunt and gather, let’s make hunting and gathering the awesomest achievement, and let’s make childbirth kinda weak and shameful.” It’s a rather silly simplification, but I believe on a mass, unconscious level, it’s entirely true. How else to explain the fact that cultures who would die to eradicate each other have always agreed on one issue? That every popular religion puts restrictions on women’s behavior that are practically untenable? That the act of being a free, attractive, self-assertive woman is punishable by torture and death? In the case of this upcoming torture-porn, fictional. In the case of Dua Khalil, mundanely, unthinkably real. And both available for your viewing pleasure.

    It’s safe to say that I’ve snapped. That something broke, like one of those robots you can conquer with a logical conundrum. All my life I’ve looked at this faulty equation, trying to understand, and I’ve shorted out. I don’t pretend to be a great guy; I know really really well about objectification, trust me. And I’m not for a second going down the “women are saints” route – that just leads to more stone-throwing (and occasional Joan-burning). I just think there is the staggering imbalance in the world that we all just take for granted. If we were all told the sky was evil, or at best a little embarrassing, and we ought not look at it, wouldn’t that tradition eventually fall apart? (I was going to use ‘trees’ as my example, but at the rate we’re getting rid of them I’m pretty sure we really do think they’re evil. See how all rants become one?)

    Now those of you who frequent this site are, in my wildly biased opinion, fairly evolved. You may hear nothing new here. You may be way ahead of me. But I can’t contain my despair, for Dua Khalil, for humanity, for the world we’re shaping. Those of you who have followed the link I set up know that it doesn’t bring you to a video of a murder. It brings you to a place of sanity, of people who have never stopped asking the question of what is wrong with this world and have set about trying to change the answer. Because it’s no longer enough to be a decent person. It’s no longer enough to shake our heads and make concerned grimaces at the news. True enlightened activism is the only thing that can save humanity from itself. I’ve always had a bent towards apocalyptic fiction, and I’m beginning to understand why. I look and I see the earth in flames. Her face was nothing but red.

    All I ask is this: Do something. Try something. Speaking out, showing up, writing a letter, a check, a strongly worded e-mail. Pick a cause – there are few unworthy ones. And nudge yourself past the brink of tacit support to action. Once a month, once a year, or just once. If you can’t think of what to do, there is this handy link. Even just learning enough about a subject so you can speak against an opponent eloquently makes you an unusual personage. Start with that. Any one of you would have cried out, would have intervened, had you been in that crowd in Bashiqa. Well thanks to digital technology, you’re all in it now.

    I have never had any faith in humanity. But I will give us props on this: if we can evolve, invent and theorize our way into the technologically magical, culturally diverse and artistically magnificent race we are and still get people to buy the idiotic idea that half of us are inferior, we’re pretty amazing. Let our next sleight of hand be to make that myth disappear.

    The sky isn’t evil. Try looking up.
    -Joss
    http://whedonesque.com/comments/13271#175716

    About 3/4 down the page is a follow-up message from Joss.

    #2
    Wow that's.....scary...
    I write articles/features/reviews for I'm With Geek.com now. Check out our stuff if you get a minute!

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    Comment


      #3
      Originally posted by mappalazarou View Post
      Wow that's.....scary...
      I absolutely agree- and sadly it's something that happens in this world every single day and needs to stop.

      Comment


        #4
        Thanks for posting this, wouldn't have seen it otherwise.

        Certainly food for thought.

        Comment


          #5
          OMG
          Thankyou SG-1 for 10 great years!
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          join Stargate Atlantis: save the lost city and lets get our show back

          Comment


            #6
            Wow I completely agree with him... But the way he writes it it's just... Amazing! I mean i liked the guy before but now he has gained quite a lot of respect in my book... I sure could post his message in quite a few halls and forums... I hope that that could help!

            Comment


              #7
              Originally posted by Trek_Girl42 View Post
              I absolutely agree- and sadly it's something that happens in this world every single day and needs to stop.
              Ah, but it's a cultural thing, and we're told everyday that other peoples' cultures are to be respected otherwise you're being discriminatory.

              I had already read about this particular honor killing. So sad. Makes me thankful that as a women I don't live in such repressive societies.



              That's what was so great about Firefly and BtVS. It had strong women characters. I've always respected Joss for that.
              IMO always implied.

              Comment


                #8
                I want to give Joss a hug (and I NEVER hug people) cos he just seems so hurt by it all.

                Then I worry that I know as much as he does about the world and yet have never launched into such an excellent rant as that.

                He's right, the world needs to change. I want it to start with the banning of full-face headscarves. We are recognisable as individuals through our faces. If someone is without a face (faceless: a euphemism for impersonal, non-person, inhuman) then they've lost a huge part of their identity.

                If women are seen as substandard by the people who do 'honour' killings it's probably something they learn before they can even talk: women are not entitled to a face.

                Sorry if this is smug of me, but i'm damned glad I live where I live and when I live. I know my children see me as my husband's equal, and society might sometimes suggest otherwise, but it doesn't insist otherwise like society would in another time or place.

                Madeleine

                Comment


                  #9
                  First off I'd like to extend a thank-you to both Trek_Girl42 and to Joss, for posting Joss's comments here and for Joss for having the courage to voice his very right opinion.

                  Second of all I'd like to add my thoughts.

                  I'm a women, very small in size and have been overlooked many times. I feel that society doesn't have a welcoming view of woman. To make matters worse I'm a women with a facial difference. So not only to I get over looked over but I get comments directed at me saying that i'm ugly and that my mother should have aborted the pregnancy.

                  I don't belive anyone, ANYONE has a right tell a women she is ugly. They seem to assume that because I look different automatically means that I have lower brain functions, that i'm not the university educated person I am. I have delt my whole life with insecurity and low self esteem.

                  Joss's blog just make my blood boil that people could just be that messed in the head as to stone a poor girl to death, and that people actually watched and now are participating in the "re-selling" of the images. How horrific!!

                  I applaud anyone who doesn't give someone who looks a tad different a second glance, and encougrage everyone to ask questions instead of just mock, stare, or pass judgement. I thank everyone who has made any efforts to help anyone in need.

                  Thanks
                  PLoker

                  Comment


                    #10
                    As someone trained to be a Social Studies teacher and also an anthropology student, I feel compelled to post these:

                    http://faculty.ircc.edu/faculty/jlet...nd%20Etics.htm

                    http://personalwebs.oakland.edu/~kit...150d/pike.html

                    Haha! I love getting to apply my geeky knowledge! It relates a bit to what we're talking about here and I think it's just interesting all on its own.

                    I think it is also interesting, as LoneStar1836 noted, that we are told to respect other cultures... until they do something that is contrary to our own cultural beliefs.

                    Humans are strange beings.
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                    See ya at the con, baby! (L.A. '11) (L.A. '10) (L.A. '09) (Burbank '08) (Burbank '07)

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Originally posted by M2W View Post
                      I think it is also interesting, as LoneStar1836 noted, that we are told to respect other cultures... until they do something that is contrary to our own cultural beliefs.

                      Humans are strange beings.
                      I think some have missed the point. I don't think Joss was saying throw the bath water out with the baby he is saying teach the baby that it doesn't matter whether you are female or male, whether you wear a burkha or a bikini it is the way you treat each other that matters... and frankly what some are calling culture others, I am sure within that very same culture, would call it a *******isation of their culture.

                      Most women even in more restrictive societies still want and prefer to be respected as women rather then bashed to death, this is not about culture it is about males not standing up to other males and stopping the madness. It is about so-called leaders taking narrow interpretations of religious text and using them to keep themselves in power and yes often used to keep women in a non-entity kind of space within that society with their permission.

                      But it has nothing to do with culture or religion, that is BS and excuse to continue to keep/beat women down, women even do it to themselves with things like female genital mutilation, that is almost solely performed by women on young girls. Often out of fear that a girl will not be married because she is seen as 'ruined'.

                      It is also in my mind no different to The Catholic Church telling women they cannot be Priest, there is no good reason other then men wanting to keep all the power. *sorry I am an atheist that crap just pisses me off!*

                      But I am sure the last thing Joss wants is for people to think he is giving the green light to racism or culture bashing or even religious bashing under the guise of freedom for women.

                      That is not the take home message I get from his comments.

                      And seriously, if you are from a western society, just keep in mind a large percentage of females are subject to sexual violence before they turn 18, women continue to be raped and murdered by men, men still bash their wives in our so-called free society... women still get fired from jobs because they are pregnant, and women are still valued more for the way they look then what they know.

                      Don't get too high on your horse, the facts are no more pretty for the west then anywhere else, which is why I say there really is no such thing as equality... Hmm, how many females have been President of the United States of America?

                      I could go on about the way homosexuals both female and male are treated and the way people with disabilities are treated and heck even the elderly... bottom line there is no equality while my friend stands in chains.

                      Big picture people, big picture.
                      [/end rant]

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Originally posted by Willow'sCat View Post
                        I think some have missed the point. I don't think Joss was saying throw the bath water out with the baby he is saying teach the baby that it doesn't matter whether you are female or male, whether you wear a burkha or a bikini it is the way you treat each other that matters... and frankly what some are calling culture others, I am sure within that very same culture, would call it a *******isation of their culture.

                        Most women even in more restrictive societies still want and prefer to be respected as women rather then bashed to death, this is not about culture it is about males not standing up to other males and stopping the madness. It is about so-called leaders taking narrow interpretations of religious text and using them to keep themselves in power and yes often used to keep women in a non-entity kind of space within that society with their permission.

                        But it has nothing to do with culture or religion, that is BS and excuse to continue to keep/beat women down, women even do it to themselves with things like female genital mutilation, that is almost solely performed by women on young girls. Often out of fear that a girl will not be married because she is seen as 'ruined'.

                        It is also in my mind no different to The Catholic Church telling women they cannot be Priest, there is no good reason other then men wanting to keep all the power. *sorry I am an atheist that crap just pisses me off!*

                        But I am sure the last thing Joss wants is for people to think he is giving the green light to racism or culture bashing or even religious bashing under the guise of freedom for women.

                        That is not the take home message I get from his comments.

                        And seriously, if you are from a western society, just keep in mind a large percentage of females are subject to sexual violence before they turn 18, women continue to be raped and murdered by men, men still bash their wives in our so-called free society... women still get fired from jobs because they are pregnant, and women are still valued more for the way they look then what they know.

                        Don't get too high on your horse, the facts are no more pretty for the west then anywhere else, which is why I say there really is no such thing as equality... Hmm, how many females have been President of the United States of America?

                        I could go on about the way homosexuals both female and male are treated and the way people with disabilities are treated and heck even the elderly... bottom line there is no equality while my friend stands in chains.

                        Big picture people, big picture.
                        [/end rant]
                        Very well put. I'm coming back to give you green as soon as I can.

                        Misogyny isn't a racial or cultural or religious problem, it's a human problem that we are all stuck in- race, culture, and religion factor into it, but it's not their fault, and far from the be-all-or-end-all. I am rather amused() by the ignorance of those who think that it's a "Muslim problem" in "their country". In western countries it's just as big of a problem- women are routinely paid less than men in the same professions. Women are routinely depicted in the media as either "babes" or "dogs"- and if you're not in that first category, you're pretty much worthless no matter what you have to say. Women past 35 are made to feel shameful about "ageing". The last statistic I heard for the number of women in North America who are raped/sexually assaulted at least once in their lives was estimated at 1 in 3- however it's impossible to get a truly accurate statistic because so many sexual assaults are never reported. Anyway, that's the tip of the very, very large ice burg.

                        I think that misogyny is the greatest problem in human society- homophobia, the mis-treatment and fear of the elderly, racism, prejudice against the disabled, they are all huge issues that shouldn't be. However, with misogyny here, we are talking about half of the Earth's human population being the "victim" (I hate to use that word, because I don't think that it's accurate, but I fail to find something more suitable). I think there just might be something wrong with that, you know, just an observation.

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Joss For President.............................of The World!!!!!
                          Please do me a huge favour and help me be with the love of my life.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Originally posted by M2W
                            I think it is also interesting, as LoneStar1836 noted, that we are told to respect other cultures... until they do something that is contrary to our own cultural beliefs.
                            And even then you still must respect them because all cultures are "equal".



                            Originally posted by Willow'sCat View Post
                            But I am sure the last thing Joss wants is for people to think he is giving the green light to racism or culture bashing or even religious bashing under the guise of freedom for women.

                            That is not the take home message I get from his comments.
                            Wasn't the one I got either.

                            My point was that criticizing certain practices in other cultures tends to get you [general you] slapped with the accusation that you are being discriminatory against that culture because you don't "understand" why they do it, and then of course there are those that like to throw in the hypocrisy argument (I saw several of those in the replies on Whedonesque). It was not a comment about Joss's post which was more about inequality and misogynistic violence in general and his inability to understand why is it still accepted.



                            Culture - the behaviors and beliefs characteristic of a particular social, ethnic, or age group; the sum total of ways of living built up by a group of human beings and transmitted from one generation to another.

                            "Honor killing" is very much a cultural thing, imo. The concept of family honor seems much more ingrained in Mid East and Eastern "clannish" societies than it is in the more "individualistic" societies of the West. Obviously such an ideal and practice isn't limited to just those cultures, but they seem more inclined to it.

                            Some interesting reads I ran across:

                            The Dynamics of Honour Killings in Turkey: Prospects for Action (published by a division of the United Nations)

                            'Reputation is Everything': Honour Killing among Palestinians


                            And seriously, if you are from a western society, just keep in mind a large percentage of females are subject to sexual violence before they turn 18, women continue to be raped and murdered by men, men still bash their wives in our so-called free society... women still get fired from jobs because they are pregnant, and women are still valued more for the way they look then what they know.

                            Don't get too high on your horse, the facts are no more pretty for the west then anywhere else, which is why I say there really is no such thing as equality... Hmm, how many females have been President of the United States of America?
                            Don't seem to recall anyone here mentioning that a state of perfect equality existed in the West or anywhere else for that matter.

                            But I can say I don't live in fear of being killed or being told to kill myself to uphold my family's "honor". I'd find that a bit more pressing issue than having a woman elected president of the U.S.
                            IMO always implied.

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Originally posted by Willow'sCat View Post
                              I think some have missed the point.
                              I didn't miss it. I totally get what everyone's saying. I must have phrased something funky. Sorry.

                              Originally posted by Trek_Girl42 View Post
                              Misogyny isn't a racial or cultural or religious problem, it's a human problem that we are all stuck in- race, culture, and religion factor into it, but it's not their fault, and far from the be-all-or-end-all. I am rather amused() by the ignorance of those who think that it's a "Muslim problem" in "their country". In western countries it's just as big of a problem- women are routinely paid less than men in the same professions. Women are routinely depicted in the media as either "babes" or "dogs"- and if you're not in that first category, you're pretty much worthless no matter what you have to say. Women past 35 are made to feel shameful about "ageing". The last statistic I heard for the number of women in North America who are raped/sexually assaulted at least once in their lives was estimated at 1 in 3- however it's impossible to get a truly accurate statistic because so many sexual assaults are never reported. Anyway, that's the tip of the very, very large ice burg.

                              I think that misogyny is the greatest problem in human society- homophobia, the mis-treatment and fear of the elderly, racism, prejudice against the disabled, they are all huge issues that shouldn't be. However, with misogyny here, we are talking about half of the Earth's human population being the "victim" (I hate to use that word, because I don't think that it's accurate, but I fail to find something more suitable). I think there just might be something wrong with that, you know, just an observation.
                              Lovely and well-written.

                              Originally posted by LoneStar1836 View Post
                              And even then you still must respect them because all cultures are "equal".
                              I hope I didn't come across as saying they weren't. SO not what I meant. More of a isn't it strange that some folk will preach about respecting everyone, but then go on a tirade when those same folk they were defending do something they don't like? Is that put better? Hmm... I seem to be incapable of writing out my thoughts adequately. Bla.
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