Musings on how to do things right (Mazz's usual stupidity reigns)

[mazzmatazz]

The world will only be right when I rule all.
And build a cloning machine.
At the very least, a cloning machine would be a start.
I would first of all clone myself. And then work about 6 jobs to earn a truckload of cash.
Then a great army would be cloned.
I think I will clone attractive, vigorous, lithe young men for that.
We're going to have a whole batallion of Sheps.
Airborne wing, felling women with dashing good looks, and felling men with gunshots.
In the leg, of course.
And then, I shall wrest control of the SciFi channel, and extend the SG contracts, and build a really big throne that looks like the atlantis chair, and live somewhere nice...
Without too much weather, and with cabana clones and broadband internet and... hmm... a wall of flat screen monitors.
Saves on actually wallpapering
I'll sign you up then?
You get a badge
I'll even print out membership cards, and laminate them at the copy shop.
Start small, and work up.
No point in having plans if they're unrealistic.
*Designs evil henchmen uniforms in PhotoShop*
I'm sure Dr Evil started somewhere.
I wonder who would manufacture evil henchmen uniforms.
P'raps there's somewhere online?
I mean, you couldn't get an army's worth on ebay.
Not unless your army is quite small, and you weren't fussed about it being custom made.
Nike's no good, you see, because they would want to put a logo on it.
I mean, what's evil about a tick?
Is it saying 'YES, we're evil'?
'YES, we're going to shoot you.
In the leg'?
I must write this all up into my manifesto and start campaigning now.
You know what they say.
The early bird catches the wormhole.

[TechnoWraith]

You have too much free time on your hands, Mazz.

[mazzmatazz]

You have too much free time on your hands, Mazz.

These things take careful planning.

If you're so great, how would YOU take over the world? And what would you do? And if you even think of putting anything serious in my thread, I'm photoshopping wraith. I don't know how yet, but I'll think of something

[TechnoWraith]

How would I take over the world?

Money and sugar.

Give someone enough money and they'll do just about anything you want 'em to.

Give a kid enough sugar, and he'll drive anyone you want crazy to the point where he or she will do anything just to get rid of the kid.

If all else fails, i could invite the Wraith to earth and ummm.... That might not be such a good idea after all.

[yasureubetcha]

Hmmmm...I have, of course, schemes in the works for galactic domination. However, these schemes will not be revealed until said domination is actually achieved, as this minimizes the risk of sabotage by spies or the mundane rank and file of humanity who might not relish the idea of being dominated.

[shinyredpants]

how could you forget the pink chickens that taste like candy and smell of sweet sweet sake?
nike isnt evil, they just produced the most comfortable shoe on the market, reebok is the evil one.
black tennis shoes are ugly. they need to be rid of
sporks are useless, rid ourselves of them and their "popularness" in society.
instead of show walker texas ranger clips on conan, switch to battlestar galactica.

that is all!

[yasureubetcha]

Oh, sporks are quite, quite useful. They make an excellent torture device, for instance. Rebellious minions will be forced to choose between spaghetti or overcooked waffles, and then consume their object of choice with only a spork. Thus the minions will starve to death slowly and painfully, as an example to other would-be traitors...

[shinyredpants]

hmm you do have a point with the sporks...well a corrugated point i guess! having to use sporks on spaghetti would be horrible,especially if the spaghetti wasnt cooked completely.

[mazzmatazz]

How could you disparage sporks so? When we all know, FOONS are the real problem in society today!

[TechnoWraith]

sporks are useless, rid ourselves of them and their "popularness" in society.

that is all!

Sporks are not useless!

In fact, sporks are efficient and economical by combining to eating utensils into one compact efficient unit. By doing this, you cut down on the resources required to make eating utensils. And besides, sporks are the preferred Wraith back-up weapon in case the stunner doesn't work.

Disparaging the mighty spork may get you sporked! Consider yourself warned, people.

[mazzmatazz]

sporks are the preferred Wraith back-up weapon in case the stunner doesn't work.

My PhotoShop twitch is playing up again...

[iLemon]

Foons!!! They are the rulers and the utmost enemy of sporks!! buahahaha!!