Originally posted by Elflinn
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Do you have a link to chapter 1? I have not read that yet...
Spoiler:
A Walk in the Woods
Chapter 1
Chapter 1
Deep in the forest of an an alien planet, SGA-1, minus Teyla, was following a barely discernible path through the underbrush. The silence was broken only by the buzz of insects, the breathing of three hot people, and Dr. Rodney McKay's whining.
“Refresh my memory, Colonel,” he said, “exactly why do we have to do our own imitation of the Bataan death march through this godforsaken jungle?”
“I told you, Rodney,” Sheppard said patiently, “Teyla went to go visit some village two days ago and we're going to pick her up.”
“Yes, yes, I know that much, but why aren't we taking the jumper?” McKay asked. “I mean, it's not that I mind being assaulted by the Pegasus galaxy's version of the mosquito, but wouldn't it be a lot, oh, I don't know, faster?”
“Yes, right up until the point where there's nowhere to land it!” Sheppard said, annoyed. “Look, I picked the closest place possible to village to land. It's only a few miles out.”
“A few miles!” griped Rodney. “Well, unlike some people I know, I spend my time making cutting edge scientific advances, not running around the city for sport. So, for me, a few miles is a little far!”
“You know one of the appealing things about the Bataan death march, McKay?” asked the colonel.
Rodney slapped at an oversized mosquito wannabe. “What?” he said irritatedly.
“The prisoners weren't allowed to talk!”
“Oh, very funny Sheppard.”
“You know Rodney,” John said, “Teyla walked all the way from the gate, and yet somehow I doubt she was complaining.”
“Yes, well, if she likes it so much why couldn't she walk back?”
“It's fifteen miles, McKay! Besides, our mission was moved up to tomorrow and Elizabeth told us to go get her early.”
“Oh, so now we have a mission tomorrow? Lovely. Why am I always the last person to find out about these things?”
“Maybe because you're so annoying,” Ronon said.
“Oh, thanks so much! And what shall we say about you, Mr. Monosyllabic?” Ronon glared at him, then turned to Sheppard.
“Can I shoot him?” he asked. Sheppard paused for a moment, as though thinking about it, then continued.
“Nah,” he said, “We'd have to carry him.”
“Good point.”
The next twenty minutes of the trip were remarkably peaceful, as McKay's whining wound down from pleasantly ignorable to practically nonexistent. John actually found himself enjoying the walk, and wishing more of the missions the team went on could be so uneventful. However, all good things must come to and end, and this end was rather wet. And rushing. About half a mile out from the village, a wide, remarkably bridgeless river crossed the path.
“Oh, marvelous!” Apparently, this turn of events had restarted McKay's complaint mill. “what kind of idiot people would live right on top of a river and not build a bridge?”
“I wouldn't say that, McKay,” said Sheppard as he stood near the bank. “looks like there was a bridge here. Just not anymore.” He waved his hand at the ground, indicating a fairly recent-looking pile of rubble.
“Of course it's washed out.” McKay said tiredly. “This is the planet's rainy season. The river must have flooded and taken the bridge with it.”
“Well, that's just dandy,” said Sheppard. “Ronon, have you been to this planet before?”
“Yeah.” the runner replied.
“Is there another bridge over this river?” Sheppard asked.
“Yes, but it's nearly twenty-five miles north of here. It would take us way to long to go there.”
“No kidding,” agreed the colonel.
“Looks like we're gonna have to wade it,” said Ronon.
“No no no no no, I am not wading across that river!” Rodney said almost hysterically.
“And why not?” asked Sheppard, turning toward him.
“Because I barely passed swimming one when I was a kid, and there is no way I am crossing a rushing, flooded river that's who knows how deep!” replied McKay.
“It's not that deep, even when it's flooded,” Ronon said.
“And this is supposed to be comforting? You could have gotten a basketball scholarship on Earth, “not that deep” for you is probably over my head!”
“Shut up McKay.” Ronon said darkly.
“Right. Yes. Sorry.” he said quickly. Sheppard gave him a look, then turned to Ronon.
“Ronon, I don't know if this is such a good idea,” Sheppard said quietly. “I might be able to cross this thing, but I doubt Rodney could.”
“How else do you plan on getting to the village?” said Ronon.
“I don't know, we'll have to figure something else out.” said Sheppard. Ronon nodded and started to turn, then stopped.
“Sheppard?”
“Yeah?”
“Do we have any rope?” the runner asked. Sheppard looked confused for a minute, then realization dawned on his face and he smiled.
“Yep.”
A few minutes later, Ronon had one end of the rope tied to his waist, the other end tied to a tree, and was halfway across the river. It looked to be chest high at its deepest point, but the runner seemed to have no difficulty. Sheppard was glad they had him along. Just then Ronon reached the other side, got out, and tied the other end of the rope to another tree. He waved to them, telling them it was ready. Sheppard looked over at McKay, who had sat down on the beach and was untieing his boots.
“What on earth are you doing, McKay?” he asked.
“First, we're not on earth, and second, I happen to have very sensitive skin, and if I go tromping around in wet boots I'll get blisters and jungle rot and sorts of unpleasant things,” McKay said, slinging his boots around his neck and stuffing his socks in his vest pocket. “Now, are we going to do this or not?”
“Yes Rodney, as a matter of fact we are.” John said.
They stood there a minute.
“Any time now, McKay,” Sheppard said.
“Oh, yes, right, of course.” said Rodney. He started to move reluctantly out into the river, holding tightly to the rope. The trip was uneventful, if rather slow, until they reached the middle of the river. Then McKay tripped on a submerged rock and went down, almost losing his grip on the rope.
“McKay!” John shouted, grabbing hold of Rodney's vest. He pulled him up out of the water, but not before Rodney's boots slipped free from around his neck and floated merrily downstream.
“Are you okay?” Sheppard asked.
“Fine. A little wet.” he leaned on the rope until he got his breath back. “Okay, let's go.” he said.
Sheppard smiled.
“Ladies first,” he said. Rodney rolled his eyes.
“Immature little. . .” he muttered under his breath, but kept moving.
They reached the other side before Rodney noticed his boots were missing.
“Oh, great! Blisters and jungle rot were bad enough, but I'd prefer those to whatever alien fungus I'm going to get now!” he complained.
“you're the one who decided to take your boots off in the first place, McKay,” said Sheppard. “ Now let's keep moving. The villagers are bound to have some boots they can lend you.”
For about five minutes, they walked in relative silence. Sheppard was shocked McKay hadn't complained more than he did when his boots were lost. He know it couldn't last long, though. . .
“Ow!”
“What now, Rodney?” came the annoyed voice of Col. Sheppard.
“I just stepped on some stupid native's idea of a practical joke, that's what!”
“What are you talking about?”
“A trap! I stepped on a stupid trap! Does that clear things up for you, captain oblivious?”
Ignoring him, Sheppard turned to Ronon.
“Think you can get it off him?”
“Yup,” came the laconic reply. He stepped over toward Rodney bent down toward the other man's foot.
“Hey—Ow! Watch what you're doing, you unevolved ape! That's very sensitive! OW!”
“Trap's off, said Ronon.
“Yes, thank you so much!” said Rodney, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “Did you really have to pull so hard? The concept was to release the thing, not rip my foot off! Good grief, I think you broke the skin!”
Ronon looked like he was going to shoot him. Sheppard rolled his eyes, slapped Ronon comfortingly on the arm, and turned to continue down the path.
“Buck up, McKay,” he called over his shoulder. “It's just a scratch.” Ronon followed him, leaving Rodney no choice but to do the same. But not as quietly.
“Oh, that's right. Mock the injured, shoeless man! You know, if Conan here hadn't insisted that we wade that river I wouldn't even be in this predicament. Did you see the rust on that trap? I could get tetanus! I'm going to have to get a shot when we get back to Atlantis. . .” Here McKay trailed off, mumbling under his breath about the unfairness of the world. Sheppard and Ronon just looked at each other and rolled their eyes.
“How far is this stupid village?” asked Rodney, sounding rather like a petulant child. An annoying petulant child. “We've been walking for hours.”
“Actually, it's only been fifteen minutes, and it should be just over this hill,” said Sheppard.
“Oh, thank goodness,” said McKay, sounding genuinely relieved. Just then, he realized that Ronon and Sheppard had stopped at the top of the hill and were staring open-mouthed at what lay below. He looked down at the scene before him.
The village had been completely decimated.
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