Carson Beckett/Paul McGillion Thunk Thread

[Aang]

*I cling to Beck and Poet gratefully, still sobbing* I-I feel like it is my fault... I did this to Corey and now it's going to destroy him unless we can fix it...I've messed up before but it's never been enough to destroy my friends, I've always m-managed to save them...but now I don't know what to do, I can't do anything right. I should just...just ask Sam to find a way to send me back to my old reality...I'd do less harm there where they never let me do anything in the first place...*I hiccup and gasp, tears still streaming down my cheeks*

[DarkenLycht]

Spoiler:

*feels Aang's sadness, she has caused and the light around her transforms in to pure darkness again* forgive me dear to have hurt you *puts her right hand on her own chest, pushing her nails through her skin and bones* just a little bit deeper *she cries out trying to reach her own heart* You are all better off without me *tries to push her hand deeper into her chest but the waves of pain coming from the wound don't allow it*

[McBecklover]

*feeling Poets anger at herself, i feel the anger in me getting stronger again, but also mixed with fear & begin to shake* -Sis, listen to me, your not going anywhere ok? Remember what you told me when i suggested leaving, we need you, I need you, Dell needs & A-Carson needs you! You stay here like it or not! *i dont mean to sound threatening but hope it works just the same*

[Aang]

*I look at Beck, my eyes shining with the tears* Sis, listen to me closely. No matter what I say when I'm like this, I promise you, I will never leave you. I'd get as far as almost stepping through to my old reality and I'd break down and come running back to you. No matter what I may say...I love you. I love Dell and A-Carson, hell I even love Poet and all her guys. I could never leave what I have here, no matter how bad it gets. *I turn to Poet and see what she's doing*

Poet, no! You didn't hurt me! *the tears still come, but I grab Poet's hand, willing myself the strength to stop her, screaming out in my mind for her guys to hear me and come, even if it's Gabriel, who I am sure doesn't want to see me at the moment*

You didn't hurt me...I've done this to myself. If I'd only asked before I did anything to Corey, Gabriel could have told me and I could have avoided this. It wasn't your fault at all. *I wish at this moment and only this moment that I had actual powers and not just the gift that has torn my heart to shreds time and time again, as I cling to Poet, trying to stop her, and praying madly that her guys will hear my thoughts that I am screaming to them*

[McBecklover]

*I feel quite angry now & i launch at Poet, grabing her hands away from her chest* -No Poet! Do not do that! Please stop! Do not harm your self, you are our friend & we need you here. Its not your fault! Please don't hurt your self *still holding Poets hands & shaking with anger*

[DarkenLycht]

*Corey appears, his red eyes sparkling dangerously, lifts Poet off her feet and jumps down with her into the ocean, wihch devours them both*

[Aang]

*I am clinging to Beck now, though I can feel myself growing weak, and it's all I can do to stay standing, my heart is ripping to shreds yet again but as with before, I cannot show it. To show it would only hurt Poet and my sister again and I can't do that, so I must carefully close my fragile heart into its box and seal it away, pretend it isn't killing me slowly from the inside and be the strong one*

[McBecklover]

*for a second as Corey was here too, my anger grew intense, until he jumped, with Poet in the ocean & my anger begins to fade, replaced with my own fear & horror*

[DarkenLycht]

I need to go for dinner now but you can continue as to how Poet and Corey will reappear again if you wish, I'll be back later)

[Aang]

*As I cling to Beck, I allow myself to feel for just a moment, I feel her horror at what just happened and quickly close off my heart and mind again, disappearing into the box of nothingness I've perfected over the years. I'd never thought I would have to seal myself off like this again after I'd found my family here in this reality, but it's clear as day to me that showing what I felt is what caused this, so I will lock my heart away once again, be the strong one for my sisters and my friends...and cry only when I am alone in my clearing on the mainland*

Sis, we need to go and tell the others...they'll probably wish to kill me for hurting Poet and Corey like this, Gabriel won't want to see me...but our only hope to save them is to tell the others what's happened. *I sigh shakily, still holding on to Beck, but mercifully I feel nothing as I've locked my gift away in the back corner of my mind where I can ignore it*

[McBecklover]

*I take my sis's arm & pull her to her feet, then we walk silently back to our quarters & find Gabriel's anger has lessened a little as they wait for Poet & Corey to return. Dante looks worried for his brother & queen & A-Carson has run off to make sure Carson keeps Abby well away from all this*

[McBecklover]

(Inbox is full sis)

[Aang]

*I look at Beck, my eyes no longer shining but sort of blank* I'm sorry Sis, I'm sorry for hurting you. I...I can promise you that it won't happen again. I've closed off my gift, locked my heart away...I can't hurt you any further. I never thought I would have to do this again, but I can't hurt you anymore, and that means that I can't let myself break down no matter how much I want to. *I turn to Gabriel, glad I can't feel him at the moment*

Gabriel, I am so sorry. I never meant to hurt anyone...least of all Poet and Corey. *I look down, glad A-Carson can't see me this way for the moment, as it took him three months to bring me out of this when I'd first come to this reality and it would probably break his heart to see me like this again*

[Aang]

(Inbox is full sis)

(just emptied it ahah)

[Aang]

*When Beck looks at me, her emotions overwhelm the blocks I had in place and I can feel her sadness, fear, even some anger...the bond of sisters is stronger than my will to hold back my emotions, I look at her and try not to cry, but it doesn't work, I can't hold back as I cling to her again and we stand in the center of the room both crying*

Beck: Sis, you need to feel. You can't lock away your emotions. It would break A-Carson's heart and it wouldn't be right for you to have to hide from your sisters and friends. *she hugs me close as I cry again, this time I don't feel the need to run though*

But Sis, if I hurt you again...I couldn't bear it... *I try to sniff back the tears, wondering why and how I still have tears left to cry*

Beck: You won't hurt us. Sis, you could never hurt your sisters and we know it. *she looks into my eyes and I can't help a slight smile, knowing she's right, and I hug her tighter*

Thank you Sis..for stopping me from making that mistake again. I can't lose any of you...it would kill me. *I wipe the last tears from my cheeks and pull away from the hug, squeezing her hand in mine, and turn to Gabriel*

Gabriel. Is there anything we can do for Corey and Poet? I..I might be able to slow the return of his memories if we can get them back here...dull it a bit so that it isn't as painful for him...I don't know. You tell me what we need to do and we'll do it.