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People named Jonas might not always make good replacements.
Dark Helmet: So, Lone Starr, now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb. Dark Helmet: No, it's not what you think. It's much, much worse!
Col. Sandurz: Prepare for light speed. Dark Helmet: No, no, light speed is too slow. Col. Sandurz: Light speed too slow? Dark Helmet: Yes, we'll have to go right to...Ludicrous speed! Col. Sandurz:Ludicrous speed! Sir, we've never gone that fast before. I don't think the ship can take it. Dark Helmet: What's the matter, Colonel Sandurz...CHICKEN?!
NINE LESSONS I'VE LEARNED SINCE WATCHING STARGATE SG-1
LESSON ONE: Anything can be McGyvered if you've got a couple of brilliant scientists - particularly when one is a linguist and the other is an astrophysicist.
LESSON TWO: You can come in CLOSE CONTACT with a Goa'uld and live to tell about it.
LESSON THREE: Penlights in the eye solve nothing.
LESSON FOUR: Special bonds with friends you consider family help when it comes to saving the world a couple of hundred times.
LESSON FIVE: Hammond of Texas is very wise.
LESSON SIX: Napoleonic Power Mongers are irreplacable.
LESSON SEVEN: Eager-beaver aliens from other planets, who seem to take on characteristics of recently ascended SGC members, should be given the benefit of the doubt.
LESSON EIGHT: A jaffa can learn to adapt to the Tau'ri sense of humor.
LESSON NINE: When you cross a sarcastic and stubborn colonel, a strong and brilliant doctor/captain/major, a friendly and caring linguist, and a loyal and stoic jaffa, you've got a force to be reckoned with. Don't test them.
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