writing the smooch

[Cpn. Chris(tine) Bowman]

Kumtraya

Here's the deal, I'm writing a shippy fic and I have to write a really hot and passionate kiss between the two characters involved. It has to be uber romantic. Problem is, I don't have much experience in that department and I'm having a whole lot of trouble writing it. I forced myself to read romance fics (I hate them, they're cornier than necessary) but it's useless, they're not the quality I want.

What do you guys do when you have to write that kind of stuff? Especially if you're not a big fan fluffly and warm?

[Guest]

Kumtraya

Here's the deal, I'm writing a shippy fic and I have to write a really hot and passionate kiss between the two characters involved. It has to be uber romantic. Problem is, I don't have much experience in that department and I'm having a whole lot of trouble writing it. I forced myself to read romance fics (I hate them, they're cornier than necessary) but it's useless, they're not the quality I want.

What do you guys do when you have to write that kind of stuff? Especially if you're not a big fan fluffly and warm?

LOL! Sorry I can't be of much help! Most of my stuff comes from memory... The advantages of a misspent youth! Of course, the disadvantages out weigh the advantages so I wouldn't recommend it.

Try watching some really hot movie kisses... Let's see... I don't know your age, and I won't insult you by assuming that "not much experience" equals very young but I will try to limit my recommendations to lower rated films.

Top Gun - the first scene between Tom Cruise and Kelly McGillis
Pretty Woman - the first time she allows a kiss, well, *fans self*
Bridget Jones' Diary - the final scene... If you haven't seen it, I won't tell you who she's kissing.
Sabrina - the newer version with Harrison Ford. I prefer the old version but the kiss with Harrison Ford in his office... He shows a vunerability that is awesome.
Dirty Dancing - half naked Patrick Swaze in his room...

First kisses are usually portrayed in movies as the most passionate. Usually because there is significant sexual tension building up in the story.

These are all I can think of at the moment that are lower rated. I'm sure that others can come up with some. And maybe you can think of some yourself. Any film love scene that makes you forget to breathe is the kind you are looking for.

Watch the scenes closely and try to describe them in writing. Don't just pick one description and use it in your story. Use two or three to get your own ideas across as necessary.

Hope this helps!

[Skydiver]

you have two options

a) go for a convenient fade to black and come back post coitus

b) go for the smut. now to be sensuous, you don't have to delve into tab a into slot b detail. it doesn't have to be a blow by blow account, no pun intended.

the best thing i can suggest is to close your eyes, picture what they're going to do. concentrate on how they feel, inside and outside. what does jacks' hands feel like? what does sam's skin feel like?
what do they say to each other? how do they say it? what does the bed/couch/whatever feel like?
what do they hear? smell? see?

close your eyes, imagine it, then put what you see/hear/feel mentally into words.

the one pitfall you want to avoid, stop and think. make sure it is anatomicaly possible to do what you're making them do.

One thing that tosses me out of a smut fic is mentioning that Sam is well-endowed (which, no disrespect to the actress, she's not what i'd call well-endowed...i save that description for Dolly Parton), or explicitly stating the same about Jack. I have read the occasional smut fic that gives him attributes that just aren't humanly possible...in fact some horses would have to work hard to measure up

[Guest]

you have two options

a) go for a convenient fade to black and come back post coitus

b) go for the smut. now to be sensuous, you don't have to delve into tab a into slot b detail. it doesn't have to be a blow by blow account, no pun intended.

the best thing i can suggest is to close your eyes, picture what they're going to do. concentrate on how they feel, inside and outside. what does jacks' hands feel like? what does sam's skin feel like?
what do they say to each other? how do they say it? what does the bed/couch/whatever feel like?
what do they hear? smell? see?

close your eyes, imagine it, then put what you see/hear/feel mentally into words.

the one pitfall you want to avoid, stop and think. make sure it is anatomicaly possible to do what you're making them do.

One thing that tosses me out of a smut fic is mentioning that Sam is well-endowed (which, no disrespect to the actress, she's not what i'd call well-endowed...i save that description for Dolly Parton), or explicitly stating the same about Jack. I have read the occasional smut fic that gives him attributes that just aren't humanly possible...in fact some horses would have to work hard to measure up

ROTFLMAO!! Oh, my! I can't stop laughing about the anatomically possible part!! And the "well endowed" comments!! I get graphical, but not that graphical!! LOL! I must have missed those fics!

[Skydiver]

it happens. i've read a fic in the past few months that has jack thinking that sam is well endowed. i guess the author defines the word differently than i do.

and the same about jack. it's funny, in virtually all smut fic, he's certainly got nothing to be ashamed about in the locker room.

as to anatomically possible...there's a smut fic out that that has two men going at it on the back of a motorcycle. now, while it may be theoretically possible, would think the concentration required to not tip the cycle over would detract a bit from the experience

the more detail you go into, the more attention you have to pay.

i've found that smut is actually harder to write than a battle scene

[Guest]

it happens. i've read a fic in the past few months that has jack thinking that sam is well endowed. i guess the author defines the word differently than i do.

and the same about jack. it's funny, in virtually all smut fic, he's certainly got nothing to be ashamed about in the locker room.

as to anatomically possible...there's a smut fic out that that has two men going at it on the back of a motorcycle. now, while it may be theoretically possible, would think the concentration required to not tip the cycle over would detract a bit from the experience

the more detail you go into, the more attention you have to pay.

i've found that smut is actually harder to write than a battle scene

I did have Jack and Sam in a difficult position once, but it wasn't a sexual one! It was the way they were sitting with each other, the way I had Sam resting on his chest... LOL! Tame, who is my beta, came back laughing at it and said it wasn't physically possible! Fortunately, I had noticed it and had already changed it to something less stressful on Sam's back!

And, yes, smut is hard to write! LOL! Though I keep telling the hussies in the chat room that it isn't smut, it's erotic literature! It's also hard to write and keep the tab a into slot b stuff to a real minium. As far as physical attributes, well, I figure something has to be left to the imagination!

So, Chris, if you don't like a smut scene that you are writing, limit it to the lead in and like Skydiver said, fade to black and come back to it afterwards... A really well written foreplay scene is sometimes more effective than a full blown sex scene!

[Skydiver]

the more detail you put in, the more you have to worry about getting it right.

think of it this way
you can say 'the weather last february was horrible! it was so cold! i hated it'

ok, no one can really nit with that, as long as you're in the northern hemisphere

however if you say 'lord, february 27th was such a horrible day. it rained all day, it flooded, we had 3 inches of rain'

ok, surely somewhere in the world that applied, but if you're not in that place, y ou're easily proven wrong.

detail can be your friend, but it can also be your enemy

[Cpn. Chris(tine) Bowman]

Heh... When did we go into smut writing already? I was asking more for describing the feeling of the kiss. Get your minds out of the gutter people!






That said, the funny things is, I do intend this fic to be smut at some point, in fact the kiss is the beginning of the foreplay scene You guys must be telepathic You also figured out it was S/J fic even though I never said it was
I dub thee the first members of the ESP club. Congratulations

[Skydiver]

Heh... When did we go into smut writing already? I was asking more for describing the feeling of the kiss. Get your minds out of the gutter people!

shrug

kissage usually leads to smuttage

[Cpn. Chris(tine) Bowman]

shrug

kissage usually leads to smuttage

ROFLMAO! Good one I'll remember that one.

What has happened to the world for this to be so true?

[Guest]

ROFLMAO! Good one I'll remember that one.

What has happened to the world for this to be so true?

Human nature ain't changed that much in 10,000 years! LOL! That's why it wasn't proper to kiss before marriage... Cause kissing leads to smut... LOL!

And since I write smut, or as I prefer to call it, erotic literature (LOL), I know about that!

ETA: And hey, I started out talking about kisses!! LOL! Skydiver started the smut stuff. And everyone knows I can't resist talking about smut!!

[Skydiver]

I am the queen of the gutter and since i don't like to be lonely, i do my best to drag as many folks as possible down to join me

[Cpn. Chris(tine) Bowman]

Well your Majesty, I have been hiding in the muck right here with you in the gutter. You are not lonely anymore

So...how do I describe getting kissed? I seriously have not much by the way of experience. The last guy I kissed slobbered...I don't care to describe Jack drooling on Sam...It's just not right.

Oh, and I'm 19, so I can watch adult movies now

[Guest]

Well your Majesty, I have been hiding in the muck right here with you in the gutter. You are not lonely anymore

So...how do I describe getting kissed? I seriously have not much by the way of experience. The last guy I kissed slobbered...I don't care to describe Jack drooling on Sam...It's just not right.

Oh, and I'm 19, so I can watch adult movies now

LOL, Well I wouldn't go for the "adult" adult movies. They usually have no kissing at all! Just the tab a into slot b that Skydiver warned you about. The list I gave you in my first post stop short of very explicit bedroom scenes.

Other movies, like Basic Instinct, or Last Tango in Paris, the new version of the Thomas Crown Affair have very explicit scenes.

Have you ever watched a movie love scene that made you hold breath, made your heartbeat faster... That's the thing you want in your fic. If you can't experience it in someone else's writing, then visually is your next best option. Describe what you see... The hands, the mouths, the breathing, the sounds, all of it... And rewind and edit what you've written already... Then you are working with your own words and not trying to learn from someone else's.

[Cpn. Chris(tine) Bowman]

Well, I'm not much into the kissy kissy stuff. The only kiss that made me hold my breath was the one in WoO heh. Well, the one from Pretty Woman ain't bad. I'm just an action/adventure or smut type Although lately I am writing more and more ship. I'm bound to get better I guess