View Full Version : A Brand New Episode....with A Twist

May 4th, 2004, 07:48 AM
me and my mate john have come up with a new 2 part episode, which involves the team in a whole new situation with the tollan.
we are in the design stages yet, but hav a basic story line, with a new gould called ' horus ' ???
story is sound and has twists and tech tht surpises, so any help with script and designs would be very welcome....cheers

May 4th, 2004, 08:11 AM
Hi Zafrod,

I'll just move your thread into the fanfiction folder where it belongs. And maybe you could tell us a little more about the story; i.e. what kind of help are you looking for exactly?

May 4th, 2004, 11:01 AM
the episode that were making is called ' Horizon ' and basically involves a huge chase by a new gould,( who is even meaner ) and the tollan, who has something which the gould needs.
we find out info about this tollan, and he seaks out the SGC for help. they are reluctant at first, but as they learn more about this tollan, they learn he holds powerful technology.
but as i sed, we are both looking for help in the storyline, and are open to suggestions about characters and scripts.


ps. we need help in the design of ships department and weaponry too

rebel jaffa
May 4th, 2004, 11:26 AM
yep we suck at makin ships :eek:

May 4th, 2004, 11:28 AM
that we do

May 4th, 2004, 11:37 AM
"Hourus" has all ready been taken on SG-1, he's an alias for Her-ur. See S6 Memento.

May 4th, 2004, 11:51 AM
hence thts the twist??????
and also we r still open for storyline changing, so any help with goulds wud be a help...


rebel jaffa
May 4th, 2004, 11:51 AM
no its spelt horus u freak

May 4th, 2004, 12:30 PM
Here are several ideas:

Maybe have the the Tollan come to us for help in their spaceships. The trailing goa'uld could have no knowledge of earth or humans what so ever, as he went his own way when looking for a new host at the same time Ra was looking. His slaves and host could be a new species never before encountered. They are in dire help and offer us their tech, but since we found Atlantis we aren't quite sure if we want their 'less-inferior' stuff.

Another sub-plot:
They could be robotic, and free the replicators. Then could invite First->Fifth onto the mothership to have tea and crumpets around tea-time. ;)

May 4th, 2004, 01:15 PM
I hope you're planning to get a very patient beta to go over your fic and correct all the spelling and grammatical errors. If you post it in netspeak it won't matter if the story is brilliant because a lot of people will refuse to read it and/or won't understand what you're saying.

I know someone mentioned a site once that included basic blueprints of Stargate Command which might also have included some layouts of the ships, but I don't have the link on me right now.

Betcha this is a case where those SG RPG books would come in handy...

May 4th, 2004, 01:45 PM
ok...here is the plot i have made out so far...as their is slight interest..

teal'g and ryac are on a planet training or wotever,( one of these tv moment things ) then they look up and see a ship crashing with a death glider behind it, which is just been blown up itself.
teal'c goes to investigate.. sees sum1 come out of the crashed ship, guy calls himself Arai, and is a tollan solider.
so basically, they go through gate and meet up with SGC etc etc, he explains why the gould are after him, and tells of either a cache of technology of either furlings or acient ( not chosen yet ) and they decide to go and check this planet out....that is it so far, would take ages to type rest of story out
i have written a more indepth storyline, but that is the basic, their are of course errors and amendments to be made but, as i said its a work in progress.

ps. excuse any spelling mistakes..ur gonna just have to make do soz
pps. also keep sending ideas in, more help the better, if your ideas go with storyline, u can join our script team ( if you want? )

May 4th, 2004, 02:05 PM
When is your story taking place? To me it doesn't seem logical for the SGC to go hunting for another cache of weapons when we just found Atlantis and are pouring over whatever has been found there. But whatever it's your fic. Who ever posted earlier is right: write it in proper English. I'm having trouble just reading your posts.

the dancer of spaz
May 4th, 2004, 06:01 PM
Does everyone get to describe their fics on this thread? ;)

May 5th, 2004, 12:21 AM
the story is told also form the tollan point of view, that is why it is a different episode... the tollan guy is named arai, and is told from his point of view straight away from the beginning, and we have a whole opening storyline of a massive battle between the tollan and the gould, with their planet being bombarded or destroyed,( as the gould now seem to be able to do this as in a previous episode ), storyline is sound, its just that you don't know all the facts...script so far is funny and makes sense, storyline could need some tweaks, ( thats why i posted this thread, because i needed some help ).
any and all help is appreciated..