Whedon's faux-Western dialogue is a creative achievement. His jokes are pretty good, too. Plus, it seems many of the offenses, great and small, of the series were rewritten for mainstream appeal. For an instance of great, the Reavers get a back story that turns them from viciously stereotyped savage "Indians" into something (thankfully, anything) else. For an instance of small, Simon Tam is no longer a comic sissy.
So why won't I catch the big screen experience, besides remembering episodes of Firefly too bad to finish watching? Whedon is seriously funny, after all.
1.) Although the Neo-Confederate stench seems to be absent, there still seems to be a Libertarian ethos. In post-Katrina days, stale and ignorant cliches about the evils of big government are in bad taste. We've had a wakeup call: A government that you can drown in a bathtub is not much use when really big water comes. Better to see a fantasy movie about drowning Grover Norquist in a bathtub!
2.) I'm not superspoiled on the plot, but I'm pretty sure that the action hinges on the notion that getting the Matt Drudge blogger of the Whedonverse to post THE TRUTH on the internet will save all. I know it's just science fiction but I don't think that excuses the completely ridiculous. No single story will topple a government, especially one on the internet. This premise requires willful ignorance of human society!
3.) Whedon also keeps the nutty opening of the series in the movie: Somebody Else starts all the action, then promptly disappears. Hey, if this is about River, then the people who release River are main characters too! Especially since even knowing about River is such a big deal.
4.) Spaceships are not a hokey cliche, not even faster than light ones. Aliens are not a hokey cliche. Psychic powers, however, are a hokey cliche. Is it really surprising that Hollywood is the Last to Know?
5.) Deadly martial artists exist only in a world without snipers, bombs, poison and the need to sleep.
6.) Popping naked out of the freezer was the last time River was actually interesting. At the end of one episode, Simon said "Time to wake up." Poor fool Whedon didn't keep the promise. Incidentally, I think that was the best line in the whole series. And the only spark of serious science fiction appeal in the whole mess.
7.) One Big Damn Solar System is not just ignorant. It is militant proselytizing ignorance. This is on par with breathing without a spacesuit or landing on the sun!
But...
Why aren't you seeing the movie?
pm
So why won't I catch the big screen experience, besides remembering episodes of Firefly too bad to finish watching? Whedon is seriously funny, after all.
1.) Although the Neo-Confederate stench seems to be absent, there still seems to be a Libertarian ethos. In post-Katrina days, stale and ignorant cliches about the evils of big government are in bad taste. We've had a wakeup call: A government that you can drown in a bathtub is not much use when really big water comes. Better to see a fantasy movie about drowning Grover Norquist in a bathtub!
2.) I'm not superspoiled on the plot, but I'm pretty sure that the action hinges on the notion that getting the Matt Drudge blogger of the Whedonverse to post THE TRUTH on the internet will save all. I know it's just science fiction but I don't think that excuses the completely ridiculous. No single story will topple a government, especially one on the internet. This premise requires willful ignorance of human society!
3.) Whedon also keeps the nutty opening of the series in the movie: Somebody Else starts all the action, then promptly disappears. Hey, if this is about River, then the people who release River are main characters too! Especially since even knowing about River is such a big deal.
4.) Spaceships are not a hokey cliche, not even faster than light ones. Aliens are not a hokey cliche. Psychic powers, however, are a hokey cliche. Is it really surprising that Hollywood is the Last to Know?
5.) Deadly martial artists exist only in a world without snipers, bombs, poison and the need to sleep.
6.) Popping naked out of the freezer was the last time River was actually interesting. At the end of one episode, Simon said "Time to wake up." Poor fool Whedon didn't keep the promise. Incidentally, I think that was the best line in the whole series. And the only spark of serious science fiction appeal in the whole mess.
7.) One Big Damn Solar System is not just ignorant. It is militant proselytizing ignorance. This is on par with breathing without a spacesuit or landing on the sun!
But...
Why aren't you seeing the movie?
pm
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