View Full Version : Baddies for my Fan Fiction- 1st attempt

Lady Bastet
March 27th, 2005, 04:20 PM
Note any suggestions or guidelines to improve this would be greatly apreciated.


Origin: The Nephilim are what remains of the Ancient’s fleet that established the Stargate network

What are they about?: Nephilim hate humans seeing them as inferior forms of life

Technology: All their technology was created by the Ancients they have no idea how to reverse engineer it, however they make extensive use of nano technology to augment their warriors.

Why have we not seen them before?: When the Nephilim started to kill humans the other Ancients took away the Hyperdrive from their ships, thus making a intergalactic travel impossible for them.

Why are they here now?: Once they realised they would all be dead before they reached even the closest world the Nephilim went into stasis and stayed on course only to wake up when they were at threat, the activation of the Ancient weapon on Dakara was sufficient to wake them from Stasis.

Units: Nephilim commonly employ Rangers, long ranged scouts who use anti gravity wings to gain intel on their enemies. Nephilim Warriors are far less common and possess an advanced personal shield that protects them from all angles.

Weapons: Nephilim Blasters are similar to those used by Anubis’s Kull Warriors, some of their officers use “bio weapons” which among other things allow them to unleash bolts of energy from their hands as if by magic- in truth this is sophisticated nano technology but to the untrained eye is almost indistinguishable from magic.

Armour: like Goa’uld Jaffa Nephilim wear armour however it consists more of heavy looking plate armour as oppose to the chain mail Jaffa wear. Their amour is also rather ornate being decorated with symbols that are a mixture of kill markings and inscriptions to honour their fallen comrades. The Armour though primitive in appearance has an energy shield that protects them from the front.

Weaknesses: despite physical superiority and access to advanced technology the Nephilim are far from invincible. Their lack of hyper drive is their greatest weakness, making planets without an active Stargate safe (for now at least). Their numbers, are lacking when compared to foes such as the Goa’uld and the Replicators. Finally their inability to understand the technology they fight with ensures that they are more cautious than previous enemies.

Commanders: The Nephilim are lead by a council of 3 generals known as the Triad, the only way to be on the Triad is by challenging and killing one of the members. The Triad is the only way for a general to legally acquire new Ancient technology.

Infiltrator- similar to the puddle jumper only more warlike in nature
Subjugator- a heavier version of the Infiltrator that can create a “fire wall” to defend troops
Dominator- magnetic catapult and drone launcher- drones are somewhat scares so their payload is limited

Plot hooks:
1. The SGC must stop the Nephilim from acquiring an Ancient database that will allow them to produce new weapons
2. A Nephilim ship awakens from stasis above a primitive human world and the inhabitants must be evacuated
3. A Nephilim believes he has found a way to ascend and must be stopped before he can gain the knowledge of the Ancients
4. A Nephilim Company has commandeered a Goa’uld mother ship which must be destroyed before it can reach a populated world.
5. Thanks to the Stargate network the otherwise crippled Nephilim can attack human worlds, the SGC must convince former Goa’uld worshiper to bury their gate.

Mr Prophet
April 6th, 2005, 02:12 PM
I don't want to dump on your ideas - some of which are good - but it's important that these things make sense and I don't think these guys do. I don't think they're a complete write-off, necessarily, but you need to think carefully about the whys.

The big question is why do they exist? Why would the Ancients create a fleet, man it with people who don't know how it works, arm them to the teeth and then leave them there? And why would they take away their hyperdrives rather than just dump them on an uninhabited planet to evolve into a more responsible form of life?

If you can answer these questions, you'll have a better idea of what is going to happen with the idea and you'll probably have something more original. As it is, they read as a cross between the Wraith (long time in stasis, travel slowly) and Anubis (want Ancient knowledge but can't develop it themselves). What I find works well for me is to spend a while plotting out histories for the race involved. There may even be stuff that you never work into a fic; the important thing is for you to have a really good idea of who you're working with.