Stigma being a Stargate Fan (or fan of any Scifi really)

[Dean Grr]

There's a Gateworld podcast involving what it feels like to be a Stargate (and Scifi) fan, #38 from the list, and the most recent podcast briefly discusses this. What I gathered from these is that it'd be great if we could accept differences, and each walk our own way, feeling comfortable with who we are.

One thing I've noticed posting on this forum, is that if I criticize a show with humor, I can expect a quick challenge, usually on the accuracy of my knowledge of the show (and often the inaccuracy was intentional ). I suspect that we sometimes identify with art, it's like a symbol for us, and any jest at the symbol's expense becomes personal. I also suspect that for many fans, including myself, we've been the target of stigma at some point, so while I might mock relationship threads, for example, that could feel like being the target of stigma in the school yard.

I suppose that's why fans come together on this site, to find a haven for talking about scifi. However, I'm not really clear how people use humor, in a friendly way, on this forum. For example, if I were to talk about the Goa'uld Anubis being Darth Vader's apprentice, the Emperor-in-training of Cheese, I'm sure I'd get some solid kick-back. I guess I just expected more humor in return, rather than distress. - Grr

[fems]

The thing with humor on a forum is that it can be difficult to interpret what the person is implying or even simply conveying that their statement is intended humorously.

Also, not everyone shares the same sense of humor. Just check out the season 1-8 vs seasons 9+10 threads of SG-1 where some folks are commenting about the awful (often juvenile) humor used in the later seasons while others really enjoyed that and thought it was great. Some even felt O'Neill's sense of humor wasn't funny at all.

To me your posts (especially the openings of your threads) often read as boring and somewhat tedious and my eyes are already drooping at the second paragraph, and I definitely don't share the same sense of humor but often don't pick up on your attempts either. No offense. They're just not my thing but since you were asking I figured I'd answer.

[JosephGracey]

Yeah I agree the thing about the intenet is if i say a joke with like sarcasm or irony a few people might get it and have a little chuckle but most will not understand it. And as for your boring opening statement i can't really say anything since i haven't opened a thread since i joined the forum.

And i don't really understand the stigma you're talking about there are some people i can talk to sci-fi about some people i can talk to about TCG's and all the other stuff.

[dr_rodney_mcray]

I agree with fems. Humor is a funny thing (no pun intended) its hard to tell if someone is being funny, or if they are mocking the whole stargate universe in general. I myself am a true fan, and I love everything stargate....Yes even stargate infinity. So when someone starts cracking jokes its hard to tell if they are making fun of forum users who love the show so much, or if its just good humor. If you know you aren't making fun of people make sure to include that in your initial post. Many people may not agree with it, but that's what makes a forum discussion great.

[Snowman37]

Stargate's well known enough for their to be a stigma? Where I live, science-fiction isn't looked down upon unless you obsess over it.

[Dean Grr]

Thanks to everyone above for your input. Yeah, unless I spend a lot of time in this forum and get to know posters by their comments, then humor can be a little out of place. I usually use just kidding (jk) or try to let people know I'm being sarcastic, but not hurtful. However, this is not always true, as for example when I mocked relationship threads with "Mega-Shark vs Giant Octopus" Relationship Thread.

To Fems: Anything I can do to help people sleep better, . I'm more formal, and probably much more exciting in my own mind, than for other posters. I think Daniel Jackson had a similar problem before he met Vala. I could probably use some exciting signatures and pictures, too.

To Snowman: I don't know if I'd obsess over Scifi. I guess people are more familiar with sports (hockey, american football, soccer, etc) than with the episodes of Stargate or Star Trek, so people respond more positively to that "shared" experience. I may be looking for more friends to share scifi with, and my subconscious nudged me towards this forum, .

The "stigma" I'm talking about is how, at least for me, scifi has been associated with shyness, being anti-social, living in a basement, etc. It can just as easily be associated with intelligence, creativity, high tech, internet startup success, etc.

[Gatefan1976]

Thanks to everyone above for your input. Yeah, unless I spend a lot of time in this forum and get to know posters by their comments, then humor can be a little out of place. I usually use just kidding (jk) or try to let people know I'm being sarcastic, but not hurtful. However, this is not always true, as for example when I mocked relationship threads with "Mega-Shark vs Giant Octopus" Relationship Thread.

To Fems: Anything I can do to help people sleep better, . I'm more formal, and probably much more exciting in my own mind, than for other posters. I think Daniel Jackson had a similar problem before he met Vala. I could probably use some exciting signatures and pictures, too.

To Snowman: I don't know if I'd obsess over Scifi. I guess people are more familiar with sports (hockey, american football, soccer, etc) than with the episodes of Stargate or Star Trek, so people respond more positively to that "shared" experience. I may be looking for more friends to share scifi with, and my subconscious nudged me towards this forum, .

The "stigma" I'm talking about is how, at least for me, scifi has been associated with shyness, being anti-social, living in a basement, etc. It can just as easily be associated with intelligence, creativity, high tech, internet startup success, etc.

For me that depends entirely on how you look at it.
To use a more modern example of what I mean, next time someone calls you a geek or a "basement dweller", consider Tyrion Lanisters speach to Jon Snow about being a "B****rd"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ASZsMRzqhs

Or for an older one, "It's all a question of mind over matter, we don't mind, cause you don't matter"

[Hyndara71]

Well, for me it's more a stigma to be a woman then to be a scifi-fan. But that could be because I come from a family where "normal" people are simply not given. My Dad was a big scifi-fan and I, and also my sister and my brothers, grew up with "Perry Rhodan", "War of the Worlds" and other scifi-classics over here. I even can't remember which my first episode of ST-TOS was, only that I always wanted Spock to be my babysitter (weird I know).

In RL it's a little difficult to find other female scifi-fans. For a while I was member of a SG-fanclub with mostly female members but ... well, that U-thing happened and the club broke into pieces (anyone wonders why I hate the show? Now you know).

In my region it is, as said above, it's not usually normal that a woman in my age doesn't have kids, a hubby, blahblahblah. Sometimes, true, I feel like an alien talking to coworkers or neighbors. But, at least, I think the most of them decide that I'm not dangerous, only ... well, not normal. And with that I can live

[Dean Grr]

For me that depends entirely on how you look at it.
To use a more modern example of what I mean, next time someone calls you a geek or a "basement dweller", consider Tyrion Lanisters speach to Jon Snow about being a "B****rd"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ASZsMRzqhs

Thanks, Gatefan. I did watch the video link, and thought it was sad for Tyrion and Jon to react that way, though I have experienced it myself (I'm thinking back years).

It's what I think and believe about myself, and as for what others think .... mutual understanding or acceptance isn't easy, or even desired sometimes. If I were to remain on this forum, and post consistently, I'll probably have less trouble with mutual understanding or acceptance. I usually post when something's on my mind, or strikes me as funny, but my frame of reference could just be eccentric, boring or old (i.e. SGU cancellation thread). - Dean

[Gatefan1976]

Thanks, Gatefan. I did watch the video link, and thought it was sad for Tyrion and Jon to react that way, though I have experienced it myself (I'm thinking back years).

I'm intriuged, why do you think that is sad?
I see that as turning a "percieved weakness" into a strength.

It's what I think and believe about myself, and as for what others think .... mutual understanding or acceptance isn't easy, or even desired sometimes. If I were to remain on this forum, and post consistently, I'll probably have less trouble with mutual understanding or acceptance. I usually post when something's on my mind, or strikes me as funny, but my frame of reference could just be eccentric, boring or old (i.e. SGU cancellation thread). - Dean

I think you are doing just fine TBH.

[Dean Grr]

In my region it is, as said above, it's not usually normal that a woman in my age doesn't have kids, a hubby, blahblahblah. Sometimes, true, I feel like an alien talking to coworkers or neighbors. But, at least, I think the most of them decide that I'm not dangerous, only ... well, not normal. And with that I can live

I guess it's almost universal (only the Sith deal in absolutes ), that people want to be liked, accepted, socialize with ease. Socializing has not been my strong suit, and perhaps I've made the mistake that because I'm on a forum, and can jump into a thread, that posters would be a) tolerant and b) understand where I'm coming from. Perhaps Syfy and SGU are what I want to talk about, but no one's interested.

It's funny you use the word alien, because to some extent, scifi and especially Stargate, represent the desire for connection (i.e. via the Stargate) with "alien" peoples or worlds. I think that's where the stigma I talked about affects me, that the need for connection, and the fact I try to do so through the fascinating, multi-universe that scifi is, is not a connection I can make with those directly around me, and isolates and saddens me sometimes. Don't worry, I feel this way about the environment and eco problems in North America, too.

I'll just have to get out more, as a certain scifi actor said ... . - Dean

[Snowman37]

For me that depends entirely on how you look at it.
To use a more modern example of what I mean, next time someone calls you a geek or a "basement dweller", consider...

That they like to make fun of people or you won't stop talking about science-fiction?

[Dean Grr]

I'm intriuged, why do you think that is sad?
I see that as turning a "percieved weakness" into a strength.

I think you are doing just fine TBH.

I think I'm doing fine, too, but maybe my expectations were raised, and I found it exciting to be part of the Stargate forum, even though forums have been around for nearly 20 years. (Are there Twitter forums, is such a thing possible? I'll probably try Twitter in a few years, but only when it's old ).

...

I think Tyrion's suggestion of how others look at you as armor, shows he's still resentful himself, just like Jon is, hacking with his sword. Strength seems to be contentment, being proactive with what you have, not hanging onto resentment (although, what a tempting bottle that is ...). I'm all for turning weakness into strength, but Tyrion seems angry himself ...

[Gatefan1976]

I think Tyrion's suggestion of how others look at you as armor, shows he's still resentful himself, just like Jon is, hacking with his sword. Strength seems to be contentment, being proactive with what you have, not hanging onto resentment (although, what a tempting bottle that is ...). I'm all for turning weakness into strength, but Tyrion seems angry himself ...

Who says *you* have to see it like that though?

[Dean Grr]

Who says *you* have to see it like that though?

Gatefan, you're right, there's no one way to look at things. Live and let live. I haven't watched the series, but judging from that one scene, don't you think Tyrion is drowning his sorrows (i.e his "armor" has a few cracks)?

In a way, I can read what you're saying as I don't have to "see" things as a stigma at all. My mind is a labyrinth, and I just need to find that ball of thread, right? For example, I was just made aware of the creative artwork and signatures on this forum, something that I took for granted. A rose by any other name, but only if you notice it first.

[fems]

The "stigma" I'm talking about is how, at least for me, scifi has been associated with shyness, being anti-social, living in a basement, etc. It can just as easily be associated with intelligence, creativity, high tech, internet startup success, etc.

Personally, I think it has a lot to do with where you live and what kind of people you surround yourself with. I've never felt that sort of stigma even though I'm a big Stargate (SG-1) fan. I'm not much into Star Trek etc but there are other sci-fi shows I like. Some of my friends like them too, others don't. Most of my friends are intelligent, creative and some like gadgets others don't. None of them live in a basement though. Everyone here has internet and in this day and age you can hardly live without it, so people will be more stunned if you don't have it. Shyness is certainly not something that's associated with me, although I can be a bit anti-social but that's more because I can see fairly quickly if I click with someone or not; if not then I'm not going to bother unless I have to.

There are lots of shows I enjoy and some of my friends enjoy the same ones, so we can discuss them without problems. But overall I don't just start talking about sci-fi or quoting from the show (it'd be a bit weird to suddenly start talking in English after all). If someone asks me what kind of things I'm into and what shows I like I'll happily share them and have never been ridiculed or something like that.

My brother used to be very into Star Wars and introduced me to it as well when I was little kid. He had the movies, the cards, posters, a cardboard Darth Vader and C-3PO and little/large model spaceships. Sometimes we'd tease him for being a geek but he's very social, always had plenty of friends and is now a successful lawyer (his girlfriend didn't want the cardboard figures in their house though).

So in short, I think it totally depends on how you act (people might think you're odd if you constantly quote lines or reenact scenes from TV shows - be that sci-fi or otherwise), where you live (people in the US seem to be more judgmental rather than a 'live and let live'-attitude for example) and what kind of people are in your life.


EDIT:

Just realized I forgot to mention age might be a factor too. These days sci-fi is more likely to be cool than stupid in younger generations. Just look at the Batman, Spiderman, Avenger etc movies that are made nowadays, while kids (and adults especially) used to be taunted about reading "comic books".

[python490]

I think the "stigma" your talking about is when people think your "weird" I never got it with Stargate but when I told my HS buddies I was excited about Dragon Age Origins there were like "really" since they were into Call of Duty(I do play also but I personally love RPG's more) but they are still my friends and they don't attack me verbally or physically, but I do understand that its not true for everyone for some they get publicly humiliated and attacked because of their interests (which doesn't have to be Sci-fi specifically but anything that is not "mainstream") Just get use to the geek and nerd labels if your around jerks.

[KEK]

I can only speak from my experiences in the UK, but I find there's much less of a stigma attached to liking Stargate than there is Star Trek. I think amongst most social groups or workplaces you'll find someone who likes the show, maybe not a fan, but enjoys it at least. With Star Trek though, that has the nerd-alarmbells ringing straight away. I'm not sure you could admit to liking Star Trek to many people without having the piss ripped out of you

[SF_and_Coffee]

The "stigma" I'm talking about is how, at least for me, scifi has been associated with shyness, being anti-social, living in a basement, etc. It can just as easily be associated with intelligence, creativity, high tech, internet startup success, etc.

I guess I'm lucky in that most people I know make the second association rather than the first one. And really, the people who associate science fiction with that first group of qualities tend not to be the sort of people whose opinions I care much about anyway.

Even if I did, I'd quickly prove their assumptions wrong. I've loved scifi since I was a little kid, and I'm neither shy nor anti-social, at all! Nor do I live in a basement...

[Dean Grr]

Thanks everyone for posting, you have given me a lot of food for thought.

You've reminded me that many people identify positively with Scifi: especially today, when working in high tech can mean Billion $ companies and some hot publicity, such as for Facebook, Google, Apple, etc. High tech is the new black!

Unfortunately, I fit closer to the stigma I mentioned: at this point I could use some better social confidence. I'm closer to Radek Zelenka, than than say, Col. Sheppard from SGA. Also, I don't have a high income, so I can't say that I love Scifi and be associated with economic success. And I guess that's the focus of my thread, that it's what we associate with Scifi that creates a public impression. Many of you have said that you identify in a positive way, through work, friends, etc with Scifi, and I find that commendable, and a great way to live. - Dean