Favorite Sheppard quotes!

[CeeKay Sheppard]

You guys have gotten to some of my favorites already, but I have a few more to add:

"Thirty Eight Minutes":
•"Don't talk to me about screwed!"
•"Lookit, Lieutenant, what I'm tryin' to say is, if you don't get this d*mn thing off me, I have even less time than you do." (I just about died when he said "Lookit." )
•Sheppard: "Hit me with the defibrillator."
Beckett: "I think you may be on to something, Major!"
Ford: "Wait, you said that would kill him!"
Sheppard: "That's the idea."

"Conversion":

Spoiler:

•"I'm not safe to be around anymore."
•"Look, I made a new friend!"

"The Siege, Pt. II":
•"So long, Rodney."

"The Long Goodbye":
•"Sometime in the middle of the night – kicking and screaming."

"The Storm":
•"KOLYA!"

"The Brotherhood":
•"I want points for this."
•"If you ever try this again... I will kill you."

"Aurora":

Spoiler:

•"Rodney, you're drooling over a Wraith!"

I'll be back with more.

[AGateFan]

McKAY: Well, according to Einstein's General Theory of Relativity, there's nothing in the laws of physics to prevent it. Extremely difficult to achieve, mind you -- you need the technology to manipulate black holes to create wormholes not only through points in space but time.

SHEPPARD: Not to mention a really nice DeLorean.

McKAY: Don't even get me started on that movie!

SHEPPARD: I liked that movie!


AND

McKAY: Well, a man wonders how he would choose to go out, given such dire circumstances. Now I know.

Old-WEIR: Trying to save the lives of others.

SHEPPARD: But ultimately failing! (He throws Rodney a smug look.)

[AutumnDream]

Sheppard: Like "dinosaurs turned into birds" theoretically or "theory of relativity" theoretically?


Spoiler from "Epiphany"

Spoiler:

Sheppard: This is Sheppard. I appreciate you can't hear me, but I don't have a volleyball to talk to, so what the hell.

1. That one was awesome. But I thought McKay's reaction was better.

2. I forgot about the volleyball thing. XD Another great one.

Has anyone mentioned:

SHEPPARD: Yeah! M.A.L.P. on a stick!

(Rodney looks at him in exasperation.)

McKAY: Yes, M.A.L.P. on a stick(!) Very clever. Are we done?

[Heaven]

Spoiler:

WEIR: Distracted?
SHEPPARD: Ah, well, the lead scientist, uh, she’s very, um ...
WEIR: hot?
SHEPPARD: I was gonna say attractive. But McKay is acting very, uh ...
WEIR: smitten?
SHEPPARD: I was gonna say pathetic.

MCKAY: I have a very firm grasp of Ancient technology.
SHEPPARD: You’ve blown up entire planets Rodney.

[AutumnDream]

And then...

McKay: It wasn't MY fault!
Sheppard: Well it didn't do it by itself!

[AGateFan]

I shot him...... in the leg.

[Ancient 1]

Paraphrasing From: TheTower (when he's being hit on by another chick)
"How is it I never see this coming?

[mckaychick]

I shot him.. In the leg. That was funny.
Dont talk to be about screwed

[DragonGate]

Oh but that quote is funnier with the whole conversation, I think.

WEIR: I'm still trying to understand, how you thought it was a good idea to test this device by having someone throw you off a balcony.

MCKAY: Oh, believe me that's not the first thing we tried.

SHEPPARD: *Huge grin, nodding, to weir* I shot him. *weir looking in shock* In the leg.*shrugs*

MCKAY: *Grinning* I'm invulnerable.

[CeeKay Sheppard]

Oh, jeez, I forgot one of the best ones:

"The Lost Boys":

Spoiler:

•"Artoo, I need you to turn off the autopilot. Now!"

I just about died laughing – Sheppard's a Star Wars fan!

[Easter Lily]

One of my recent favourites comes from Coup D'etat...

Spoiler:

It's Colonel Errand Boy to you!

[Easter Lily]

Oh, jeez, I forgot one of the best ones:

"The Lost Boys":

Spoiler:

•"Artoo, I need you to turn off the autopilot. Now!

I just about died laughing – Sheppard's a Star Wars fan!

Of course he is... afterall he's from "A galaxy far, far away"...

[MacGyver`]

Since most of the funny ones were already posted, I'll just post a moderately good quote from Coup d-etat:

Major Lauren: "So eh, you come to rescue us?"
Sheppard: "Well just about a moment ago I thought you were dead, but now that I see you speaking and breathing... yeah, I'm thinking about it".

[Yanks4Life23519]

lots of good quotes from Coup D'Etat...


Sheppard [to Ladon]: What – no ZeePM?
Ladon: I sent it to another planet for safe keeping. How stupid do you think I am?
Sheppard: From what I remember, I gave you a pretty good crack on the head last time we met, so I was kinda hoping it made you simple.
Ladon: No, it didn't...but ever since then I've been plagued with headaches.
[John smiles.]
Sheppard: You're just sayin' that to be nice.



Ladon: I'll only talk with Weir.
Sheppard: Do I make you nervous?
Ladon: Not at all, Major. I'm just not interested in talking to the errand boy.
Sheppard: That's Lieutenant Colonel Errand Boy to you.



Ladon: I need about a hundred machine guns, a couple of dozen grenades and any C4 that you have to spare.
Sheppard: Sounds like you're havin' a party



Sheppard: I left one of our best Special Ops guys on the planet when we searched him. If Ladon goes anywhere, my guy will find him.
Weir: Good thinking.
Sheppard: Could've been Mensa!



McKay [to John]: You know, I'm not sure that you've sufficiently trained me in actual combat. I-I-I don't know how much use I'd be in a fight-our-way-out kind of scenario.
Sheppard: Well, I look at it this way: the Genii have tried to kidnap you on numerous occasions to mine that big old brain of yours.
McKay: Yes.
Sheppard: Well, if we get into trouble, I'll just trade your life for mine.
McKay: Oh, funny.
Sheppard: Don't worry – if you survive, I'll mount some sort of rescue mission...eventually.



[after enterring the warehouse]
Sheppard: Clear! Start doing a room sweep. [To Rodney and the two marines with him.] You three with me. We're finding Ladon.
[They start to walk.]
McKay: See how I almost stunned that guy?
Sheppard: I must have missed it.
McKay: Yeah, but if he was, like, a step to the right, I would've stunned him for sure.
Sheppard: Good for you!



Sheppard [to Lorne]: Way to be alive.
Lorne: Thanks, sir! So, uh, have you come to rescue us?
Sheppard: Well, until about a moment ago I thought were dead, but now that I see you speaking and breathing, yeah, I'm thinkin' about it.



[after waking up from being gassed]
McKay: What the hell happened?
Sheppard: We got gassed.
McKay: Are we in some sort of trouble?
Sheppard: Was it the gas or the prison cell that was your first clue?

[Infernorhythm]

From "Coup d'Etah"

WEIR: Good plan.
SHEPPARD: Hey, could have been Mensa.

From "The Defiant One"

MCKAY: What now?
SHEPPARD: Keep shooting!

[GateR_mk]

[quote=Yanks4Life23519][color="Navy"]Dex: Ah! I think they're loosening.
Sheppard: Take it easy Chewie. You're gonna cut your damn hands off.

to continue with the star wars motif:

"Artoo, I want you to turn the autopilot off"

nothing happens

"Worth a shot"

[AcidSquid]

I liked it in Home when he said, "Now someone is gonna tell me what the hell is goin' on here!"

...just the way he said it. XD

I use that one at parties, With a real gun.

[Infernorhythm]

Oh but that quote is funnier with the whole conversation, I think.

WEIR: I'm still trying to understand, how you thought it was a good idea to test this device by having someone throw you off a balcony.

MCKAY: Oh, believe me that's not the first thing we tried.

SHEPPARD: *Huge grin, nodding, to weir* I shot him. *weir looking in shock* In the leg.*shrugs*

MCKAY: *Grinning* I'm invulnerable.

The greatest scene of Season One. I want that as my screensaver.

[alfirin_kirinki]

Oh but that quote is funnier with the whole conversation, I think.

WEIR: I'm still trying to understand, how you thought it was a good idea to test this device by having someone throw you off a balcony.

MCKAY: Oh, believe me that's not the first thing we tried.

SHEPPARD: *Huge grin, nodding, to weir* I shot him. *weir looking in shock* In the leg.*shrugs*

MCKAY: *Grinning* I'm invulnerable.

God, now I miss season one again - so. much.

[Captain-Peregrine]

One of my personal favorites from Hot Zone:

Sheppard: "Get as far away from the nuclear explosion as possible. Good advice, Rodney. Thanks."
McKay: "You're welcome."

And then from Rising--I think part 2:

"Well, it's official. You don't get to name anything. Ever."