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    #1

    Alien Express

    Did anyone watch Lou Diamond Phillips in SciFi Channel's Saturday night movie, "Alien Express?"

    http://www.scifi.com/alienexpress/

    "Lou Diamond Phillips (Supernova, Young Guns), must overcome his haunted past to board a bullet train and save its passengers — including his estranged but still beloved wife — from aliens on a rampage in the unstoppable high-speed locomotive. "

    *cough*

    I had the movie on for white noise -- I sort of listened to it while I surfed the net.

    It was your typical Class C scifi/horror schlock fest. It had some good lines of dialog, really bad special effects, REALLY bad acting by most of the actresses (whom I'd never seen before in anything) -- and it had this one clever bit:

    Here's the scenario.

    Lou Diamond Phillips is on Train A, heading west at 120mph. They can't stop their train due to some problem...

    Another cast, in Train B, is heading east at 80mph. This train can't stop...due to some problem...AND it's carrying a cargo of radioactive explosive waste.

    They're on the same track.

    Lou asks his train dispatcher friend how long until they collide...and she goes through the whole SAT problem recitation of: if Train A is going so many mph, and Train B is going so many mpg, and there's 200 miles between them, when do they collide...

    It was funny.

    Can't recommend it, but it does air again this Thursday at 9pm on the SciFi Channel (US).

    Oh...and Todd Bridges is in this movie. (Yes, the actor from Different Strokes)

    As an FBI Agent!

    Stunt casting, I love it.

    Here's the info for the movie at IMDB, where it's known as "Dead Rail":

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0450258/combined



    Morjana

    SG1/SGA/SGU - Saving Earth/Atlantis/?, one mission at a time!
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    #2
    Alien Express derailed before it left the station if you ask me. Another typical offering by SciFi Originals. Now the other train movie they made (Atomic Train) was actually a movie i watched and found interesting.

    Alien Express was simply just bad. The alien sequences looked way to CGI-ish and special effects were pretty mediocre. The Acting was little off, but not overly terrible. Like i said, another typical offering from SciFi Originals.

    Comment

      #3
      Its sad. I am a Sci-fi groupie. I will pretty much watch any show that is sci-fi (at least until I find it stinks) but in truth, if it wasnt for Stargate and Atlantis and to a lesser extent BSG I probably would never, ever watch the Sci-fi channel.

      What a wasted opportunity for a cable channel.... even Lifetime for women has more interesting original movies (but maybe thats due to the prevalence of stargate actors they have in those movies )
      Joseph Mallozzi -"In the meantime, I'm into season 5 of OZ (where the show takes an unfortunate hairpin turn into "the not so wonderful world of fantasy")"

      ^^^ Kinda sounds like seasons 9 and 10 of SG-1 to me. Thor, ya got Aspirin?

      AGateFan has officially Gone Fishin (with Jack, Sam, Daniel, Teal'c) and is hoping Atlantis does not take that same hairpin turn.

      Comment

        #4
        Originally posted by AGateFan
        What a wasted opportunity for a cable channel.... even Lifetime for women has more interesting original movies (but maybe thats due to the prevalence of stargate actors they have in those movies )
        ...Or the lack of really bad CGI-ish fake-looking giant snakes, aliens, and anything in between.

        Comment

          #5
          You guys need therapy for your this penchant you have for hurting yourselves by watching this stuff. I know I do like some bad movies on occasion but even I know that scfi channel origins are bad for the brain. I think the last one I watched involved dragons.. although I did sit in for a small amount of one that had Teryl Rothery in it. And sadly I did sit through both Epochs, one of them, twice. Oy! I'm as bad as the rest of you.

          Scifi Channel really wastes money and time on some crappy scripts. I just don't understand where they're getting these concepts from and why do these people continue to have jobs? Is there really such a great audience for prehistoric beasts resurrected through the wonders of genetic engineering? They just keep making the same movie. Wasn't there already one called Atomic train? It's just odd how often trains with nuclear material seem to get away in the scifi world but they don't ever derail until they're about to reach a big city or hit something important.

          I'm waiting for the day a mosquito that fed on alien goo from a recently landed meteorite, stings a genetically engineered runaway sabertooth transforming it into a super predator with metal coated fangs, armor beneath it's fur and can outrun a cheetah twice over. The alien super tiger then hops on a train, attacks the conductor, which causes him to break the brakes, which sends the train careening towards a national monument just opened to the public after renovation to install a nuclear power plant nearby which is being toured by a few hundred school children and the president.

          "You know what would make a good story? Something about a clown who makes people happy, but inside he's real sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea." - Jack Handy

          Comment

            #6
            Originally posted by MarshAngel
            <snip>

            Scifi Channel really wastes money and time on some crappy scripts. I just don't understand where they're getting these concepts from and why do these people continue to have jobs? Is there really such a great audience for prehistoric beasts resurrected through the wonders of genetic engineering? They just keep making the same movie. Wasn't there already one called Atomic train? It's just odd how often trains with nuclear material seem to get away in the scifi world but they don't ever derail until they're about to reach a big city or hit something important.

            I'm waiting for the day a mosquito that fed on alien goo from a recently landed meteorite, stings a genetically engineered runaway sabertooth transforming it into a super predator with metal coated fangs, armor beneath it's fur and can outrun a cheetah twice over. The alien super tiger then hops on a train, attacks the conductor, which causes him to break the brakes, which sends the train careening towards a national monument just opened to the public after renovation to install a nuclear power plant nearby which is being toured by a few hundred school children and the president.
            You know... write the script and you could sell them that. I mean, it's just the sort of movie they would love to waste money on. Just make sure the movie doesn't get a good budget.
            What's the point of a Sci-Fi original movie if it doesn't have the crappy CGI and actors?

            Comment

              #7
              No offense but I thought that this movie just sucked!!!

              Comment

                #8
                these scifi original movies all suck, i dont know why they continue to make these. at least use the budget from all those movies and create a decent one with good CGI, not crap CGI.

                i think the only scifi originals that i thought were somewhat entertaining was Alien lockdown and the Epochs. i liked alien lockdown a bit since i liked their "sci-fi"'ed AK47s and the CGI wasnt as crappy as the others. epochs were decent, but everything else sucks.

                Comment

                  #9
                  Originally posted by Anubis345
                  No offense but I thought that this movie just sucked!!!
                  *cough*

                  Yes...I watched this flick a second time -- and MOST of the movie was even worse than I thought, especially the really, really bad special effects. Oh...my. Toy trains and helicopters. Nice.

                  However...I was impressed with Lou Diamond Phillips. The poor guy -- stuck in a flick like this, yet he delivered another fine performance. He's such a good actor, I wish he could get better roles.

                  And...some of the humor was good.

                  But, yes, this movie goes immediately to the "there went time wasted" category.

                  Morjana

                  SG1/SGA/SGU - Saving Earth/Atlantis/?, one mission at a time!
                  SG1-Spoilergate Richard Dean Anderson Fans Abydos Gate Morjana
                  Morjana's Blog Twitter

                  Comment

                    #10
                    The Soap on E!, made fun of Alien Express. And watching the clips they showed, it really looked like crap.
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